It never fails to shock me how a tip is demanded in the US. People simply refuse to listen to reason when we (yes, there are others!) tell them that leaving a tip isn’t necessary. Well, I’m hoping for too much here, but if you’re a waiter, here are 5 reasons why I will try my best not to give any money to you and why the reasons for tipping are crappy.
1. You act as if you’re my best friend
Just leave me alone ok? I don’t want to bloody chit chat with you. I want food. FOOD! Get it? It’s a restaurant. I go there to eat. I go because I want either Italian food, Chinese Food or something else which I can’t get in a McDonald’s. So I come to a restaurant to fulfill my cravings for it. I will pay for what I value – food. Not you.
Christ, you offend me – kneeling down next to my table, pretending to like me and chatting as if you’re my best friend when it’s obvious that all you’re after is the tip! I’m not a bloody money bag you know. I will pay the bill which includes the cost of the food, the environment and the salaries of the people involved – nothing more.
The only way to get money out of me that I don’t have to legally pay is by prying it out of my cold dead hands…
Bottom line: I don’t want to know your name, or interact with you for any longer than I have to in order to place my order. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the equivalent of a conveyor belt that brings me my food and a computer into which I input my order. Of course, I won’t be rude. But don’t expect me to interact with you any more than I would with some stranger.
Image Credit: cafemama
2. You don’t get paid enough
And this is my problem how exactly? It’s astonishing that customers are expected to make up for your employer’s cheapness in not paying you a decent wage. Please include the full cost in everyone’s bill thank you very much. I’ll pay it because I have to and the charge is there for me to see.
What’s really funny here is that no one seems to criticize the employers! All criticism is reserved for non tipping customers instead of the owners of the restaurant for not paying a decent wage. Wtf! Could it possibly be because you guys know you can make much more by tips and under report your income to the IRS?
3. You’ll spit in my food if I don’t tip you?
And I’ll shoot your kid if you don’t give me a million dollars. Seriously, am I even hearing this right? You’re actually using the threat of blackmail to make me pay you? Well as long as you’re openly claiming to be a criminal it’s all right I guess.
Fortunately that’s why I prefer buffets. Listen apart from it being illegal, this shows your poor integrity. But if you spit in someone’s food because they didn’t give you money you didn’t earn, then you’re a loser and deserve to be a waiter for the rest of your life.
4. Bringing me my food isn’t worthy of being paid extra
Did you cook it? Did you invent it? No. You picked it up and brought it to me. While it might not be easy, there are plenty of jobs which are much worse – shop floor workers for example. And I’ve been a shop floor manager, so I know. Face it – compared to other jobs, being a waiter is unskilled. You get paid what the market will think your services are worth. You don’t deserve more for your work over and above what your employer should pay you.
5. Money doesn’t grow on trees
I expect you to be grateful and pray for me at night if I tip you 10%. Be happy I gave you anything at all. I worked for the money in my wallet and by giving you some I didn’t have to, I’m doing you a favor. Learn to remember that when people give you something they don’t need to, it’s a favor. You don’t complain that they didn’t give you more!
By the way, the same thing above applies to all professions that demand tips including those on cruise liners.
So now that you understand why I won’t give you money you don’t deserve, stop with the “oh how could you?” attitude. I can. And I will.
Update: Here’s a rebuttal of the many silly justifications for tipping that people have given in the comments section.
Ok, I think I have seen enough on this. So let’s break this down. I work in a restaurant and I pretty much cover every shift in the place both FOH (Front of the house : serving, hosting, bussing, bartending) and BOH (Cooking, Dishing) and a bit of Shift lead. While yes it is true that I make 4.95 an hour, if my total tips do not equal minimum wage (8.25) an hour by the end of the week, I get minimum wage markup, basically my company will pay me minimum wage to help with not getting tips. What this boils down to is I have to make 3.30 an hour in tips to make minimum wage for that hour. So, everyone has pretty much covered what happens when you don’t tip. Do you also know the more that you claim in tips the lower your paycheck is, and once you hit what your paycheck would be with a minimum wage job in tips, you won’t get a paycheck. This means, that if you work 25 hours a week, minimum wage before taxes would be 206.25, now if you claimed more than 206.25 in tips for that week you won’t get a paycheck, so while not tipping does hurt your server, it isn’t the end all be all. I have also traveled abroad and to different countries, and even though tipping the wait staff isn’t custom, I still do it. I work in a restaurant I know how it is, I have to give them a tip. So now that this is established, do you also know you are suppose to tip hair stylists, the bell hop at a hotel, valet parking, taxi drivers, delivery drivers, etc. It just isn’t a restaurant position, you are suppose to tip people in other positions too. Servers aren’t begging for your money for a tip, they are providing a service and expect compensation. You wouldn’t go to a five star hotel and not tip the bell hop for running your bags to your room, or the valet attendant for parking your car, or the door man / security guards in your apartment/loft complex. These are other tipped positions that provide a service.
Now, I am done with the tipping part of this. Here is where I have another issue. We aren’t there to be your friend, we are there to take your drink order, your food order, keep your drink refilled, bus your table, take your food out, and give you prompt service at payment. Every server knows this, however; companies that we work for, don’t know this. For example, the company I work for tells me I should greet my table within one minute, I should offer the guests an alcoholic beverage and if that gets turned down I should offer a premium non alcoholic beverage, along with an appetizer choice. Of course this is all after I tell you my name, and let’s not forget they want me to tell you my name again before I leave the table to get your drinks. So as it may seem we are “trying to be your friend” we really aren’t; we are doing what is expected of us for our job. That is issue number one, you have to have a personality to be able to work with the general public in a place where everyone is cranky because they are hungry, and heaven forbid if the kitchen messes up the food, because then it is the servers fault. Going along these lines, do you realize that if you interacted with your server more, they would be more tempted to leave you alone? Personally, when I think a table is ignoring me, I will keep checking on them to make sure everything is okay and trying to make small talk.
The last major issue I have with this is statement five. I’m grateful for whatever money is left for me; however, it is a slap to the face when a table leaves 10% or less on their bill. So lets translate this into something else. You are a freelance writer and I am a client. You write something for me and I am not happy with your service; you fix it and we move on. The time for payment comes and I give you 90% of what you charge, because I wasn’t happy with the service you provided me. Would you be grateful and pray for me at night if I only gave you 90% of your fee? Most likely you would take me to court to get the other 10% of the money you think you deserve from me. Any position that you receive tips from, that person is providing a service to you and you tip based on the service. If it is poor service, yes you leave 10%; however, service industry standard is 20%. I also want you to think about it this way as well. You and some friends go out to eat at a restaurant. There is 15 in your party, your server then has to get 15 different drinks, 15 different food orders, 15 different checks. Can you handle 15 different clients at once and be expected to give each of them the same amount of quality service. So please, believe me when a job in the service industry isn’t an unskilled job, as it takes more skill to wait on tables than it does to work at a retail place, where you stand at a cash register, or where you help people with electronics.
In conclusion, you do make some valid points in these 5 reasons, however; do realize that not all of us have a job of this nature because we are ignorant or unskilled. Restaurant work is hard and brutal, but can be rewarding all in the same. It allows you to network with a different group of people and maybe pick up clients if you are a freelancer, etc. Most of your service industry staff above the age of 25, has a degree in something and they can not find a job in their degree field.
That being stated and more as a side note to statement number one, if you don’t want the human interaction then don’t go to a place that requires you to interact with someone else. These whole statements are a two way street here. You also have the choice not to patron these establishments.
i work as a bartender and i make my customers smile, i get paid minimum wage and work my butt off for that, tips are how i make a living. a few bartending shifts a week making minimum or below minimum wage wont pay for my apt or the food to feed my kids… tips are what make the world go round for people like me. if you want good service want me to pay attention to you, tip me and i wll make your experience happy and memorable. treat your bartender your waitress or waiter fantastic and you will get fantastic service. tip me nothing you are screwing me and my kids and leave us homeless. take that weight on your shoulders. tip your waiters, waitresses and bartenders or … stay home !!
You should eat at buffets! You obviously do not understand the concept of food!! Serving does take skill , I’d like to see you try it. Just for a month. I take pride in my job and helping people enjoy their night. If I’m wanted for entertainment or whatever , I know how to read people, they want me around or they don’t. I help make memories and smiles. I’m a sales person(hard to stomach huh???)
and I know and love my product…..FOOD! !
THAT HARD EARNED MONEY IN YOUR POCKET !?
WELL WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU THINK I’M DOING ? WORKING FOR FREE? IF YOU THINK I JUST TAKE
ORDERS SIR , THEN YOU HAVE OBVIOUSLY NEVER
BEEN TO A FINE DINING RESTAURANT! !
UNSKILLED? ??? I’m still stunned. …
I make my tips by being nice and friendly, (because I actually care ) product knowledge, and being able to sell things I like , and know my guest would like. And HOE ON EARTH
Stay the fuck out of our beautiful country if you can’t handle our shit. 14,000,000+ individuals who actually live here and work their asses off know that when you work your ass off, you deserve pay. That’s how freedom works. You stay your Eurofag ass in Canada and don’t fuck around with this place. You come in the wrong restaurant and not tip and we’ll have a group of monkeys follow you out to your car and we’ll see if we don’t get that tip. This is how we do shit, and if you don’t like it, then stay the fuck in your own country. Enjoy your censorship and gun control, I’ll enjoy my freedom. Fucking Canadians.
Youre so lame it hurts
Haha. Oh, nothing amuses me more than an ignoramus who has the audacity to be pretentious.
That’s fine, don’t tip. But at least have the balls to say so to your server beforehand, so they can give you the service accordingly. Then don’t have the nerve to complain when your food is cold (the conveyor belt will conveniently be on the fritz that day), and definitely don’t expect any refills, napkins, or any other miscellaneous items I’m sure you demand, even while knowing you’re going to screw your server over, simply because you’re a douche bag. That way, when you ultimately cheat a server out of their time and income, they won’t feel so bad about it.
I’ll give this post an A+ for shock value. It almost seems like a joke, that’s how ridiculously rude it is. I don’t know what happened in your life to make you so universally unlikable, but wow. It’s almost like you have to make more of an effort to be this much of an asshole, as opposed to just doing the decent thing and abiding by American customs.
By the way, if servers were paid enough by their employers to compensate for what they usually receive in tips (from decent people, obviously), they’d be receiving minimum wage or more, and wouldn’t be taxed as severely due to no longer reporting tips. Then guess what? That Italian and Chinese food you crave so badly would significantly go up in price. For someone with such an inflated sense of self-importance and intelligence like yourself, one would ASSUME that you would realize that. And, judging by how cheap you clearly are, you wouldn’t want to shell out all of that money for your cravings anymore, anyway.
It’s not so much that you’re a cheap bastard that’s bothersome, it’s the high horse, rude manner in which you tried to justify your cheapness that was a genuine example of being an awful human being.
Congratulations, sir. You are a douche. Your mother must be so proud. Maybe if you had a good spouse in your life, she could cook for you (since you obviously can’t do it yourself), so you wouldn’t have to plague any hard working servers with your presence. Unfortunately for you, women, as a whole, don’t find cheapness attractive in any sense. Maybe that’s why you’re so angry. I guess I just feel sad for you.
In reply to Jocelyn
I will never put up my name due to you gen y tyrants. I swear you speak to people that dont tip on the same level as people mass murdering shooters. Fine my name is Shawn. Or maybe Danny. For all i know yall are lying. Why am i on this blog so much? I care deeply for this subject.
All of you children are simply mud slinging like typical politicians. Your mother this f u that. What about real concrete solutions to this arbitrary problem?
In capitalism you are only required to pay what is contractually obligated. I can then tip what i please. Back when i was a kid a tip was your spare change. The 80s saw 10%. The 90s saw 15%. Now were at 20%. Whats next 50%? At this rate that isnt impossible.
You all have bills? Not my problem. Im a consumer. Your ills mean nothing to me. This is how capitalism works. You spoiled kids demanded so much that all your wonderful jobs have been shipped overseas due to your sense of entitlement.
Again here in cali all make minimum wage. Does that mean i dont have to tip? The system is bad i agree but the more i feed into this status quo the more it remains this way. Tipping is obsolete. You want obsolete culture? Tipping is as obsolete as women not working yet yall fall prey to it.
Get another job, protest, unionize. Great options.
In reply to Common Sense
Here is the thing with minimum wage and the service industry. No one wants to work in an industry that pays you minimum wage without the tips. Here is why, if you wanted to come down to it, how many servers make just minimum wage including their tips? I mean you have to be in a really slow restaurant or be a really bad server if you make whatever your states minimum wage is. So to make it fair, the average server in a chain restaurant can bring in between 15-20 dollars an hour, would you still complain if you didn’t have to tip but know your server is more than likely making more an hour than you? Or is all of this complaining about not tipping a server, because you know they make more than you.
In reply to Danny
Then it seems that we are at an agreement–servers make more than minimum wage. This therefore means that there is no need for me to tip. As far as the mandated 18%, if the restaurant enacted this, it is my contractual agreement to pay the 18% no matter what.
Regarding your comment below:
Just because say I order some food and I absolutely hated it, doesn’t mean I don’t pay for it right? We are speaking about contractual agreements here. This is why I have no problem with the automatic 18% gratuity–it is essentially set in stone. I’m sure you can always complain to the manager and they can perhaps throw in a free dessert, however an automatic 18% removes a lot of arbitrary factors from the service itself.
Now lets compare another example: retail. Let us say you purchase a sweater, however the salesman that was with you was absolutely obnoxious. Does this mean you are allowed to have a certain percentage of the sweater removed from your final costs? remember, part of the sweater’s costs are going to the sales person, just as part of the food costs are going to the establishment and the staff.
This is why we need to SIMPLIFY things in order to make for more efficient service. Many restaurants out here in San Diego enact an 18% gratuity. Servers at these restaurant are some of the best because they all make the same amount of money and focus on the consumer as a PERSON rather than Dollar signs. Look up the Cutlery. Great food, great service and a truly innovate way to serve people.
BTW making more than me in an hour? I make more than twice that, I really don’t mean to brag so please spare me. All of my life’s hard work payed off. Debt free (well never really had debt because I don’t purchase things like the typical consumer driven American) and now I’m relatively young and make more than the average American, which, yes, is much more than $20/hour.
In reply to Common Sense
Uh oh “common sense” – perhaps the phrase “yall” hints at why you are so concerned about not tipping…could it be that it is…”the way of your people”? …or shall i sayyyy, “YOU people” ;-) Dont worry, servers know what theyre in for when they see ya coming. And…oh yes…some of them *do* spit in your food.
I also want to pose a question, Common Sense. If all restaurants mandated an 18% gratuity on all of their bills and you had poor service, because the server knew, no matter what happened they are getting 18% from you, would you say something about the mandated 18% added to the bill?
BTW nobody wants to work minimum wage? Duh of course not. But you have to start somewhere right? I did. Everybody does. Every child dreams of making millions of dollars on their first day of work, but the fact is this rarely ever happens. Everybody starts on the bottom of the food chain and this is absolutely true in EVERY industry. Yet why is the service industry the only industry that has the luxury of receiving tips? Is it the guilt process and the social stigma? I made minimum wage, but I saved my earnings, went through school and make some pretty good money now. I can argue that I still don’t make enough, but everybody can argue this. Every American is never satisifed with their current paycheck.
Spare me about the “nobody wants to work minimum wage.” This is true, nobody does, but that isn’t the point here. THe point here is why on earth do I have to pay a fee VOLUNTARILY? Where am I legally bound to do so? Is it because I will look like a jerk if I don’t tip? Lots of wealthy people are jerks too–Steve Jobs (RIP), Bill Gates, Donald Trump, Ted Turner. THey really don’t care about what the rest of the world thinks of them. They work hard and when they make their money they are smart about it.
This is a very sad issue about today’s liberal society. A bunch of entitled spoiled children that feel they are entitled to the world. Guess what? Life is hard. Your wages are low. Deal with it. You chose an industry where you are not guaranteed to receive tips. That was your choice and now you have many people fighting this status quo and you are seeing your cheated earnings diminishing. Don’t get me wrong, I do see the humanistic side of all this, but face it we live in a CAPITALIST society that demands for both wealthy and not so wealthy people. The fact that you make less money than others is a fact of life, so please deal with it.
I, Common Sense, as a consumer have no regard to any of your social ills. Just bring me and my family our food. Make life simple for you and us. If you are making such little money to begin with, don’t take it up with me, the consumer. Take it up with your employer, unionize with fellow staff members, protest or quit the job. Let your employer feel the stigma of being so cheap as to paying you. As a manager, my responsibility is to ensure my employees are satisfied as much as possible in all facets of the job. Perhaps your managers are not doing the best they could be doing.
Tipping is obsolete. Get with the program. We live in 2012, an era of free market capitalism. BTW, all of you kids complaining about low jobs? Why don’t you go over to the manufacturing plants in Bangladesh or China where the kids there make about $5/hour and are more than happy. Be satisfied with what you are given and don’t complain like a bunch of brats.
In reply to Common Sense
The industry isn’t going to change just for you and a few other kooky Mr. Pinks who don’t tip. So, you might as well get over it.
In reply to Common Sense
so what you are saying is we should be grateful we make LESS PER HOUR than kids in China? If we complain to employers and our wages go up, so will the cost of your food! then you WILL be forced to pay us, one way or another!! It’s one thing if you think servers dont work hard and dont deserve the money we make, but to suggest we should WORK FOR FREE (because our hourly covers our taxes and thats about it) is absurd!! not to mention the job entails a great deal more than “bringing food to a table” but I wont insult your intelligence by assuming you don’t know that….
In reply to Common Sense
Kids in China and Bangladesh make $5 an hour?? I think they would be over the moon if that were true. Forget kids, even the regular workers don’t make $5 a day (yes, DAY) in most parts of China, India & Bangladesh, believe it or not.
I think anyone that walks into a resturaunt KNOWING they arent gonna tip, should let their server know that as soon as they are greeted, and watch what kind of service they deserve.
Your a fucking asshole!!!! I bet you money that you could never be a server because you obviously don’t have any people skills at all!!! Im a server And I would never be a server if I didn’t get tips because sometimes we have to serve assholes like you and we should get a tip for having to put up with your shitty additude!! Your probably not from the U.S.A so of you don’t like the fact of tipping get the fuck out of are Country!!!! Nobody asked you to move here!!! Go back I where your from!!!! And it takes skill to be a server!!! You wouldn’t know cause you don’t have the skills to be a server because your suck a dick!!! I would love to see you try and be a server when your slammed you have about 30 to 40 people all asking things from you all at once and your serving hundreds of people a day! Come back and tell me you would do that job for min wage!!! Are job can be exhausting!!! So fuck you and your stupid ass!!! Your just a big asshole!!! Go fuck yourself!
In reply to Kristin
Talk about xenophobia. Look it up. Im American born and raised and i dont like tipping. Serving 30 or 40 people? Try testing 1000 patient samples a day. Try helping 30 or 40 people in retail. Try working in sewage treatment where you deal with 30 to 40 tons of excremant. Its called work. Its not supposed to be easy so get over yourself. Go back to soviet russia if you dont want to work. Go to Greece right now and see what its like when everyone gets a “fair ” paycheck. You all are so bratty and spoiled.
In reply to Kristin
Lol you servers seem to think you do some kind of special job that only you lot can do. Well newsflash, its called unskilled labor for a reason. There’s a reason why people who are laid off in the economy are working as servers. Because its one of the few jobs just about anybody can do without any skill whatsoever. I am sure its incredible hard work bringing food to the table while the chef is weaving his magic wand to cook all the delicious food, you sure have made a believer out of me Kristen.
And look who’s talking about shitty attitude. Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately? Your language and attitude is something to behold for someone working in the service industry.
Knowing most of you servers will never unionize to ask for minimum wage because its apparent you can earn $100/hr with tips (you mentioned this yourself in another post), I think its obvious to anyone with more than two brain cells why some of us think 20% tip is excessive anyway. Well good news is thousands of people are visiting this site daily thanks to Google and they will all get a real good picture of how greedy and pathetic you & your server friends are. I hope the gullible rich people that you prey on keep tipping because the wise folks will read all these comments and know better.