It never fails to shock me how a tip is demanded in the US. People simply refuse to listen to reason when we (yes, there are others!) tell them that leaving a tip isn’t necessary. Well, I’m hoping for too much here, but if you’re a waiter, here are 5 reasons why I will try my best not to give any money to you and why the reasons for tipping are crappy.
1. You act as if you’re my best friend
Just leave me alone ok? I don’t want to bloody chit chat with you. I want food. FOOD! Get it? It’s a restaurant. I go there to eat. I go because I want either Italian food, Chinese Food or something else which I can’t get in a McDonald’s. So I come to a restaurant to fulfill my cravings for it. I will pay for what I value – food. Not you.
Christ, you offend me – kneeling down next to my table, pretending to like me and chatting as if you’re my best friend when it’s obvious that all you’re after is the tip! I’m not a bloody money bag you know. I will pay the bill which includes the cost of the food, the environment and the salaries of the people involved – nothing more.
The only way to get money out of me that I don’t have to legally pay is by prying it out of my cold dead hands…
Bottom line: I don’t want to know your name, or interact with you for any longer than I have to in order to place my order. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the equivalent of a conveyor belt that brings me my food and a computer into which I input my order. Of course, I won’t be rude. But don’t expect me to interact with you any more than I would with some stranger.
Image Credit: cafemama
2. You don’t get paid enough
And this is my problem how exactly? It’s astonishing that customers are expected to make up for your employer’s cheapness in not paying you a decent wage. Please include the full cost in everyone’s bill thank you very much. I’ll pay it because I have to and the charge is there for me to see.
What’s really funny here is that no one seems to criticize the employers! All criticism is reserved for non tipping customers instead of the owners of the restaurant for not paying a decent wage. Wtf! Could it possibly be because you guys know you can make much more by tips and under report your income to the IRS?
3. You’ll spit in my food if I don’t tip you?
And I’ll shoot your kid if you don’t give me a million dollars. Seriously, am I even hearing this right? You’re actually using the threat of blackmail to make me pay you? Well as long as you’re openly claiming to be a criminal it’s all right I guess.
Fortunately that’s why I prefer buffets. Listen apart from it being illegal, this shows your poor integrity. But if you spit in someone’s food because they didn’t give you money you didn’t earn, then you’re a loser and deserve to be a waiter for the rest of your life.
4. Bringing me my food isn’t worthy of being paid extra
Did you cook it? Did you invent it? No. You picked it up and brought it to me. While it might not be easy, there are plenty of jobs which are much worse – shop floor workers for example. And I’ve been a shop floor manager, so I know. Face it – compared to other jobs, being a waiter is unskilled. You get paid what the market will think your services are worth. You don’t deserve more for your work over and above what your employer should pay you.
5. Money doesn’t grow on trees
I expect you to be grateful and pray for me at night if I tip you 10%. Be happy I gave you anything at all. I worked for the money in my wallet and by giving you some I didn’t have to, I’m doing you a favor. Learn to remember that when people give you something they don’t need to, it’s a favor. You don’t complain that they didn’t give you more!
By the way, the same thing above applies to all professions that demand tips including those on cruise liners.
So now that you understand why I won’t give you money you don’t deserve, stop with the “oh how could you?” attitude. I can. And I will.
Update: Here’s a rebuttal of the many silly justifications for tipping that people have given in the comments section.
You really are a stupid human being. In case you don’t know how this country works, the government sets the minimum wage for tipped employees, not the employer, sure the employer can raise the bar if they choose, but I guess they are greedy bast***s, kinda like you! Server’s bring you drinks, bring you food, put up with your bull****, refill at your whim, no matter how many glasses of water you drink, remove your dirty dishes, clean up after you when you are gone, and put up with your mind-numbing stupidity and ignorance. May you choke on a fish bone on your next outing!
If all you’re looking for is to be handed food then go to a drive thru and stop wasting our time.
Wow. 7000 comments. I have never seen a blog post with this many comments. It’s obvious this guy hit a nerve.
And guess what? He is exactly right. Tell me the logic behind tipping a server more because my plate of food costs more than my friends plate?
Why am I tipping a bartender who hands me a beer, while that same bartender will then go to Walmart and not tip the kid who just pushed fifty carts in out of the rain?
Why am I tipping the waitress, when she will go to the movie theater and not tip the kid who just sold her popcorn?
It’s fucking stupid, pathetic, and all the people who support the tipping system are morons.
I approach finances like a corporation, since all these stupid people are letting corporations run rampant. I will pay what I must pay. Is tipping required? No? Then I won’t tip. If you give me poor service, then I won’t return to your shitty business. It’s as simple as that.
Tipping is only prevalent in Canada and the USA. And yet, I guarantee you will find better service in numerous other countries. Countries that don’t use the tipping system.
There *might* be reasons to tip, but it would be for those out of the ordinary situations.
Fuck the haters. Go ahead and keep throwing your money down the drain so the business owner can buy a new car every year.
In reply to 74473
Just don’t go out to eat. It’s that simple. In other countries they’re also paid more than 3 something an hour. All y’all non tippers are just sad people
In reply to 74473
If servers made a higher wage like at those other businesses and other countries then tipping wouldn’t be an issue. Min. wage for a server is $3.50 and the reason it’s that low is because it’s customary to tip. You try living on $3 an hr. in a country that can barely survive on $8 an hr. and I’m guessing you’ve never worked in the hospitality industry so we wouldn’t expect you to understand. If tipping is an issue for you then please feel free to eat, drink, and be merry at home.
In reply to sarah
Why do we need minimum wage to begin with? I’m glad there is an industry that says NO to the ridiculous big brother mandates of the government.
You living on $3/hour is NOT my problem. You are NOT contractually obligated to complain about your wages. You and your employer have an obligation to serve me food. I have an obligation to pay what is on the bill.
Feel free to auto-grat.
In reply to Common Sense
So you’re really going to try and say with the pages and pages of posts you’ve made all over this topic about how unfair having to tip is and blah-fucking-blah, that YOU of all people wouldn’t throw a 3-year old’s temper tantrum if you saw 18% auto-grat on your check even ONCE? Hell you’d go crying to the manager louder than when your mom first expelled your sack of useless bullshit from her pussy and everyone here knows it.
Oh and no one has an obligation to serve a clearly under-educated, underpaid, greedy pole smoker such as yourself. Walk into my restaurant and try to pull that bullshit you’ve talked about. We’d all throw you out on your ass faster than you can add up how many a la carte items you can get for less than $10
I have this great idea. Why can’t businesses simply increase their prices fifteen percent and then pay their servers a cut of the food and beverage profits? It simplifies the system and makes it easier for everybody.
I’m done tipping. I’m not there to fuck around with numbers. I’m there to eat food. If you can’t serve food without requiring me to do calculus just to figure out my bill, then fuck you. You’re a terrible person, a terrible business owner, and I hope you fucking die.
And I’m especially done tipping bartenders. Pouring drinks shouldn’t make you rich, you fucking assholes. I’d rather put a bullet in your face.
In reply to yhgtrfewd
If basic addition is what you call “calculus” maybe you should take that gun and put the bullet in your own brain. Also, judging from your aggressive demeanor, I’d say you’re one of those lonely, loser drunks that shows up to drink alone about being single, poor, car-less, job-less or any combination of the choices and then I get to tolerate your belligerently slurred attempts at conversation especially with any remotely attractive woman daring enough to get close to you.
No pouring drinks alone does not justify tipping, HOWEVER, dealing with 30 assholes just like you all wanting cheap shit while trying to impress the bar rat they’ve targeted definitely is a good start at justification. Or maybe its that majority of the time we run the floor and supervise including doing check-outs, cleaning, and closing up at 2:30 after we’ve finally talked a cabby into hauling your pathetic ass anywhere but at the bar so we could finally go home ourselves.
But I really don’t expect you to understand all of this because, as previously stated, you think basic addition is calculus, you seem to think going out in public to be withdrawn and awkward towards those trying to get you what you want is ok, AND you don’t think the poor bastard that has to tolerate your whiny drunk rants and crying deserves a little recognition financially. After all, you’re too fucking stupid to google how to make the syrups, extracts, and bitters required to make the flamingly homosexual drink you insist on ordering 6 times. So in short, you’re fucking stupid. Flat out. I’m sorry you had to hear it this way. I wish your mother would’ve gone with the abortion too, I know. But hey there’s always suicide right?
The stupidity of these servers are why big business in America gets away with so much bullshit.
If corporations are people, and corporations get to act in such a manner to preserve as much value as possible, then I have that right as well.
Is tipping required? No? Then I won’t pay it.
If you low IQ servers have a problem with the way America operates, then you can fuck off and die.
Tipping is nothing but a psychological trick used by the business world to give the appearance of lower prices all the while making the customer both feel guilty about not tipping and feel good about tipping.
Given all the illiterate hate spewed by the wait staff who frequent this discussion, it’s obvious most of them have the IQ of a bean. And in that case, it’s no wonder you work for a shitty boss. I bet you don’t even know the salary of the business owner, do you?
Ha ha ha ha. The poor people in America are so stupid. Unfuckingbelievable.
I’m not going to subsidize your shitty paycheck and end up in the gutter with you at old age while your boss is living in a mansion outside Aspen.
In reply to John
John, very well said sir.
I really do not see how waitresses would be able to get organized to stand up for better wages. Their low IQ and lack of any useful job skills would never command better pay anyways.
What really surprises me is the job of waitress still exists. Even in a fancy restaurant I would gladly speak to the head chef and pick up my meal when it is completed. I am so tired of speaking to dimwitted waitresses and water boys. Put a carafe of water in the middle of the table and go away. I have never known anyone to give a crap what the waitresses name was anyways. Such a waste of time to listen to the waiters dribble about the specials when I could simply read it for myself. I especially hate it when the so-called wine expert shows up at the table. Long before he even showed up I opened up my wine app. No need for that worthless job anymore either. My favorite part is when I see tears in the waitresses eyes, because she expected 20% of $450.00 and saw zero.
In reply to Salvatore
You are a horrid person. And frankly I wouldn’t have tears in my eyes at the end of that. I would follow you out of the building and call you a fucking asshole, and a moron.
You clearly have never worked in the service industry a day in your life, because if you had you would tip. Only people who have served before really understand all of the bullshit we go through from people like you.
Oh and I have a low IQ just because I am a waitress? Jeeze I guess having a 4.0 GPA in honors classes in high school meant nothing than. Many people are servers to get themselves through school.
Sadly in my case it isn’t. With the job economy so bad here in the US, it was the only place that called me back, and I now have a secure, reliable job that I love to go to. I never got the chanceThankfully when there are the complete and utter assholes like you that intentionally and knowingly hurt a waitress by doing something such as that, occasionally there are the people at the other table who saw what you did, and walk over, apologize for your rudeness, and give me a larger tip, or something if they weren’t my table. Not all of the time, since finding people who are kind are much more rare than finding the assholes like you.
Clearly you make too much money, and are warped by greed like the rest of America. Seriously go eat fast food if you want to avoid tipping. Or pay someone to come to your house and cook for you every meal.
In reply to Kat
4.0 GPA in high school in honors classes? That’s cute ;)
I, like salvatore, reserve the right NOT to tip. I am not contractually obligated to do so.
In reply to Common Sense
Then go to McDonalds douchebag
In reply to Kat
Kat, I FULLY understand. I graduated from college cum lade, with two degrees and got a job in my field, but for a small company who laid everyone off because they could not afford to benefit us. So I am now a server. I was raised to tip, and I have never looked down on someone who is a server. The fact that there are so many hateful people in this world who thing they are better than the person bringing them their food. Why must you be so hateful? Did you not get enough hugs as a kid? Are you unhappy in your marriage, and want to take out your misery on everyone else?? Ignorance is not bliss and your ignorance as to what it takes to make it in the service industry is appalling, and the fact that others support you is even more appalling.
Yet you are the same assholes who would be complaining if your food didn’t come out to your table in a timely manner, because I am spending my time with another table, who is going to tip me or when I do nothing about the fact that your food is wrong because no matter what, you are not going to tip me. And the same people who know that you eat ketchup as though it is going out of production, and send me back to the kitchen for extra ketchup when all you had to say was I am a hoarder if ketchup so bring an entire bottle please.
And you complain about so many people not working period. Well, if you would tip, several of those people who are now on social services, wouldn’t be there if they could earn a living!!!
So screw you, and I hope we don’t cross pates because although I have never spit in anyone’s food before, there is always a first time for everything.
In reply to Salvatore
Think back to your last trip to McD’s…
That slow, surly, dull-eyed teenager…
If your server was that bad, you’d send an email to corporate, right?
If them being paid less than the McDonalds employee doesn’t offend you, but their lack of professionalism does, you’re recognizing that they could have added value to your experience.
Added value is the entire schtick of the serving industry. We know the menu, you don’t. That’s it. The entire industry boils down to your ignorance. It’s literally more efficient to have cute girls, who demand extra monies, explain to you why you can’t do that, than have you interact with the chef, who would want to cleave you.
Congrats! Even though you don’t tip, you’re part of why the industry exists!
In reply to Salvatore
Salvatore and John, I’m assuming your mother’s dropped you both when you were little, and your daddy was always gone on business trips and couldn’t give you his love, huh? You guys are assholes. Simple as that. You are the type of person nobody wants to deal with ever. You realize there are plenty of people who work wait staff in order to save money for college? IE they have brilliant IQ’s? Ever questioned your pathetic IQ because you make assumptions based off of nothing? Tipping is how we make money because if we were being paid regular wage, your meal would be double the cost and a lot of customers would be lost. How do you not realize this? You were complaining about IQ earlier so please, do some simple math in your head and realize you save money doing a 10% tip rather than a 900 dollar tab. If its to be believed you dropped 450 at a restaurant. Which personally I don’t. You sound like a prude. Why don’t you stay home from now on and masturbate with sandpaper? You’re clearly a shitty human being, and I promise, no waiter has given a damn what your name is either if you act like that. Believe or not there is this thing called nice people, and karma. Google it on your iPhone bro, your app makes you so smart bro. Gah my technology makes everyone obsolete, I’m so smart (you see what I’m getting at? You’re not smart, you have a smartphone. Douche.)
In reply to John
Fuck off and die.
It’s amazing to me that someone with a seemingly adequate amount of intelligence can be so unbelievably ignorant. You think serving tables is an “unskilled” profession? It takes patience, kindness, organizational skills, and interpersonal skills (which you clearly lack).
You wouldn’t last a week waiting tables. I work as a waitress so I can afford to put myself through college. I have a 4.0 at a University while still working and raising a family. And I’m proud of that.
Unfortunately, the service industry always presents us with condescending ignorant jerks who think they’re smarter than us. News flash, genius: I’m no imbecile. I have a brain and I use it to be the bigger person and serve you DESPITE your nasty attitude and skewed view of the service industry.
Please. For the love of god. Stay in Canada you ignorant selfish moron. The lower prices of food in the US only exist because restaurants pay servers $5/hr or less because they ASSUME condescending asswipes like yourself will tip based on the service they are recieving. Which yes includes taking your order and roughly 20 other individuals orders at the same time and making sure you get exactly what you ordered (gluten free, dressing on the side and all) at the same time as 20 others. By all means stick to buffets or fast food if you don’t feel the need to tip but stay away from sit down restaurants if you don’t agree with how they function. Oh, and feel free to choke on something you ordered tip free and die too. No one will miss you.
Waiter, waitress job is unskilled according to the Department of Labor. So stop saying you have skills. All you really have is a simple dead-end job. I am sure walking and chewing gum at the same time is also very difficult for you.
I can see most of these people have never worked in the service industry before. You are the dumb fucks of this society. I actually work in the service industry, and I tip well every time. Why? I know what it’s like to be screwed over from cheap/ignorant people like yourselves. These servers have to live off these tips, you know. My dad works as a server, and as a kid, I saw the effects when ignorant people like you didn’t tip. Next time you think about not tipping a decent amount, think of the people who will have to suffer. If you’re planning to go to a sit down restaurant but aren’t going to tip, here’s a suggestion, don’t go. Get your big fat asses to Mcdicks.
Servers don’t make minimum wage because they rely on tips from people like you, who are just assholes and don’t tip. Servers don’t make 20-30 dollars an hour like you probably do. In fact, if you’re making that type of dough, then just fucking tip. That’s another thing that gets me. People today are so fucking spoiled and have their heads up their asses. It pisses me off how people can go to a restaurant, and complain about the stupidest little things. Maybe you should try living in a third world country, and realize how much you actually appreciate life here.
Bottom line to my rant though, if you go to a restaurant to eat, just fucking tip. Money isn’t the fucking essence of life, it’s just a piece of fucking paper/chunk of metal people gave value to. Fuck man plain and simple to me