It never fails to shock me how a tip is demanded in the US. People simply refuse to listen to reason when we (yes, there are others!) tell them that leaving a tip isn’t necessary. Well, I’m hoping for too much here, but if you’re a waiter, here are 5 reasons why I will try my best not to give any money to you and why the reasons for tipping are crappy.
1. You act as if you’re my best friend
Just leave me alone ok? I don’t want to bloody chit chat with you. I want food. FOOD! Get it? It’s a restaurant. I go there to eat. I go because I want either Italian food, Chinese Food or something else which I can’t get in a McDonald’s. So I come to a restaurant to fulfill my cravings for it. I will pay for what I value – food. Not you.
Christ, you offend me – kneeling down next to my table, pretending to like me and chatting as if you’re my best friend when it’s obvious that all you’re after is the tip! I’m not a bloody money bag you know. I will pay the bill which includes the cost of the food, the environment and the salaries of the people involved – nothing more.
The only way to get money out of me that I don’t have to legally pay is by prying it out of my cold dead hands…
Bottom line: I don’t want to know your name, or interact with you for any longer than I have to in order to place my order. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the equivalent of a conveyor belt that brings me my food and a computer into which I input my order. Of course, I won’t be rude. But don’t expect me to interact with you any more than I would with some stranger.
Image Credit: cafemama
2. You don’t get paid enough
And this is my problem how exactly? It’s astonishing that customers are expected to make up for your employer’s cheapness in not paying you a decent wage. Please include the full cost in everyone’s bill thank you very much. I’ll pay it because I have to and the charge is there for me to see.
What’s really funny here is that no one seems to criticize the employers! All criticism is reserved for non tipping customers instead of the owners of the restaurant for not paying a decent wage. Wtf! Could it possibly be because you guys know you can make much more by tips and under report your income to the IRS?
3. You’ll spit in my food if I don’t tip you?
And I’ll shoot your kid if you don’t give me a million dollars. Seriously, am I even hearing this right? You’re actually using the threat of blackmail to make me pay you? Well as long as you’re openly claiming to be a criminal it’s all right I guess.
Fortunately that’s why I prefer buffets. Listen apart from it being illegal, this shows your poor integrity. But if you spit in someone’s food because they didn’t give you money you didn’t earn, then you’re a loser and deserve to be a waiter for the rest of your life.
4. Bringing me my food isn’t worthy of being paid extra
Did you cook it? Did you invent it? No. You picked it up and brought it to me. While it might not be easy, there are plenty of jobs which are much worse – shop floor workers for example. And I’ve been a shop floor manager, so I know. Face it – compared to other jobs, being a waiter is unskilled. You get paid what the market will think your services are worth. You don’t deserve more for your work over and above what your employer should pay you.
5. Money doesn’t grow on trees
I expect you to be grateful and pray for me at night if I tip you 10%. Be happy I gave you anything at all. I worked for the money in my wallet and by giving you some I didn’t have to, I’m doing you a favor. Learn to remember that when people give you something they don’t need to, it’s a favor. You don’t complain that they didn’t give you more!
By the way, the same thing above applies to all professions that demand tips including those on cruise liners.
So now that you understand why I won’t give you money you don’t deserve, stop with the “oh how could you?” attitude. I can. And I will.
Update: Here’s a rebuttal of the many silly justifications for tipping that people have given in the comments section.
Wow I see this discussion is still going strong. I found this article that I thought was interesting…http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/12/magazine/12tipping-t.html?pagewanted=1&em&_r=0. Also, I want to add that yes your state does set the minimum wage, but all that means is that your employer cannot pay you BELOW 2.33 or whatever it is, but they can certainly pay you more.
In reply to BBD-Lite
I’ve gone to this restaurant and the service, along with the food is EXCELLENT!!!
American culture? This article totally disproves that. Tipping came from Europe and was met with fierce opposition.
You are correct sir. An employer can pay your MORE than 2.33. Heck, aren’t most of us paid more than $2.33/hour?
the NY times article:
Eighty percent of Americans say they prefer tipping to paying a service fee, according to Zagat Survey. They do so, Leo Crespi’s surveys first demonstrated, primarily because they believe tipping provides an incentive for good service. But there is little correlation, in fact— less than 2 percent, according to Michael Lynn, a Cornell professor of consumer behavior and marketing.
Note the last sentence
The single most important factor in determining the amount of a tip is the size of the bill. Diners generally tip the same percentage no matter the quality of the service and no matter the setting
So much for “service” being factored in. Even if you get crap service, most diners tip as well as they would to someone that gives out great service.
In reply to Common Sense
I smell rationalization. One study does not a fact make. You’re a cheap bastard. Own it. So few people (you evidently included) do. I admire honesty. I do not admire rationalization. It may explain why you live in Kalifornia.
In reply to redleg
Um, born in raised in California. What, now you are critizing my home? I don’t mind being called cheap. Nevertheless, tips are not required for me to pay. So why would I need to do so? I’m not rationalizing anything, i’m just showing fact. I’m referring to the studies referred to by the article posted.
RedLeg, you seem like a great American, then why are you critizing my free speech?
In reply to Common Sense
CS– brother– I may hate what you say but I will defend with my dying breath your right to say it. But the best answer to offensive free speech is more free speech– not government regulation. It seems you dislike when someone counters your arguments– I have as much right as you to say my mind. You are perfectly free to dislike it. Never asked you to tip– just told you to own the disapproval when you do. And again, one study does not a fact make. It is an informed opinion, usually filled with bias, that is as yet unproven. You are dressing your rationalization up with studies and how it is perfectly awesome to be cheap and most tips don’t mean a thing about the service. I can can find similar studies if you wish proving the exact opposite.
In reply to redleg
I’m curious to see these studies proving that tipping generates better service.
Waiting for some eagerly…
In reply to bhagwad
You know, I don’t think there are any studies on this. It would be interesting to see, though.
But more factually, I think the results would show that average customers would receive adequate to above average service. Whereas regulars who DON’T tip, who by the waitstaff is KNOWN not to tip, will receive poor service. And as it goes oppositely, regulars to the establishment who are KNOWN to be good tippers, will receive quite a bit of better service than normal.
I don’t think that for guests that are not regulars, there would be a “better” or “worse” service, because the staff won’t know whether or not they are a good tipper until AFTER they finish their meal.
I LOVE it when people try to excuse their cheapness. You seem to be saying “It’s someone else’s fault that I’m a d-bag”. Well Dude the only people you should be blaming for being a cheap and whiny d-bag is yourself and your parents.
In reply to Tessa
Tessa, let me ask YOU then. California wait staff already make minimum wage BEFORE tips. Does this mean I’m required to tip?
Also why can’t I tip 14% instead of 15%? Does the 1 less percent make me a d-bag?
In reply to Common Sense
I give you props for not cutting out comments… many people would have flounced.
You can tip 14%. That is fine. I’m sure some would mind, others wouldn’t notice. But you said you tip 0%.
You don’t have to go out and have people bring you food and drink. You can eat and drink at home. You can go to a fast food establishment. You have options. But, you’re whining about going to an establishment where it is expected that you will tip and the waitstaff are taxed on your phantom tip. Minimum wage in many areas of California is a pittance, it is a pittance in “cheap” areas as well. Waiting on tables is demanding work and there is a tacit agreement that the waiters will take the minimum wage for waiters in the area and not a higher wage because customers are aware of and will tip based on the food and drink they order.
You have decided to make your own rules. I stand by my opinion, based on your own words, that you are a cheapskate who is trying to justify your cheapness by blaming it on others.
Don’t go to restaurants if you do not want to pay a tip, you prick.
In reply to anon
Lol – and you get to demand that…how exactly?
In reply to anon
what gives you the right to demand anon? who are you to say otherwise? You are in no position of legal authority, are you? The law states that I only pay what is on the receipt. All tips are optional. Wait staff took the gamble of accepting such a position while also taking the gamble of receiving tips that are not necessarily guranteed.
Think of it this way. When you invest in the stock market, you are not GURANTEED riches. That in itself is a gamble. Waiting is similar. Either you make TONS of money off of tips or you make less. You can’t demand otherwise.
In reply to anon
I wonder if he refuses to tip on a date (if anyone is willing to go out with him). Not many women would find that attractive. Then again I’m sure he has a very strong opinion on paying for his date’s meal too.
As of the stock market. The comparison between investing in stocks and getting paid for the work you do is not comparable. When you order food someone is going to bring to you in a full service restaurant it is considered a given that you will tip. That’s how it works here. If you don’t like you can (as mentioned a hundred times) not go to a full service restaurant. Or move to another country where the waitstaff get paid a wage commensurate with the work they do. You can try to justify your cheapness all you like but it is nothing but empty justification.
Big surprise you’re Indian. Thanks for respecting other peoples cultures. How awesome of you to smash a whole industry that takes alot of effort and doesn’t pay out very well. Keep up the good work and remember: “compassion is a virtue that only the respectful follow in EVERY situation.” Have a nice day hag wad.
In reply to Randomness.
Racism, like cheapness and douchebagery, is not cool.
Dude. Just….. don’t go out to eat. Seriously. I’m a server, and I wouldn’t spit in your food because you refuse to tip me – I would never do that to a customer even if I somehow, magically, could tell who was and wasn’t going to tip me at the end of their meal – I would spit in your food on principal. Because you fucking suck as a person. You’re cheap, and this is just your defense as to why you should be allowed to be cheap. Well great, you’re totally allowed to be, and I don’t mind at all. But if you’re going to be cheap, don’t go out to a place where common courtesy requires you to tip the workers.
I’m not going to attempt to convince you otherwise of your opinion, because it seems that you are beyond the point of reason. The majority of people being served in this country understand that the tip left is your payment for the service you receive and the dining experience – clearly you are part of the minority that just doesn’t get it.
What I will say is that if you’re choosing to go into a restaurant and your philosophy is that you refuse to tip, fine. But you owe it to your server to tell them that “you don’t tip” as soon as you’re seated.
If you’re choosing to go into a restaurant and your philosophy is that you refuse to tip, fine. But you owe it to your server to tell them that “I don’t tip” as soon as you’re seated.
Come wait tables for me for a month … getting no other paycheck … then we will talk.
So from your so called writings or musings
It is easy to discern that you are ignorant & smug!! Here is a tip for you when traveling learn the costums of whichever place you visit therefore your cheap ass will know how to act properly when in public
In reply to Me
Ahem…it’s the “custom” in Arab countries to mistreat women. That doesn’t mean I’ll go there and do it. I hope you’re the kind of person who won’t either.
“It’s the custom” is no excuse for unethical behavior.
In reply to bhagwad
I’m just going to say, there is nothing about tipping waitstaff who provide a service to you that is “unethical.”
Comparing the custom of paying for a service you voluntarily use to the custom of abusing or mistreating women is like comparing night and day. The only similarity is that they are customs.
The BIG difference is that the American custom of tipping is paying for a service you use and helping people around you in doing so, whereas the Arab custom of mistreating women only hurts innocent people with no justification for it.
So seriously, that comparison is getting old and is completely irrelevant to the topic at hand.
If you’re going to compare the tipping custom to another, at least chose a custom that has good intentions or reasoning behind it.
In reply to Brittney
I consider tipping to be a form of bribery. You’re paying someone extra to do their job that they’re already employed to do. The fact that they signed up for low compensation is not an excuse and is completely irrelevant. Their low wages are not my concern.
So I have very good reasons for comparing these two because I view both customs to be unethical.
In reply to bhagwad
But they are still entirely different.
What part about leaving a tip to a low wage waiter is seriously hurting you as a person? Does leaving a tip really hurt you so much financially that it imposes on your ability to pay your own bills or live your life?
So sorry, NO, that is ridiculous to compare something so life affecting like that Arab custom of how they treat women, to the American one of tipping. Not even remotely the same in the category of what could be considered “unethical.”
In reply to Brittney
Everything you just said about tipping can be applied to bribing poorly paid government bureaucrats.
“Does leaving a bribe really hurt you so much financially that it imposes on your ability to pay your own bills or live your life?”
No it doesn’t. But paying a bribe is still wrong.
In reply to bhagwad
Just because YOU consider it a bribe, does not in fact make it a bribe. Some people understand the idea of leaving a tip for unpaid services. The waiters don’t get paid to do their job, or not REASONABLY, and most people don’t consider that fact as a bribe to get money out of their pockets. We understand their service is not paid for, so we pay for it. Is it necessarily OUR problem as the consumers? No. But we partake in the custom of eating out so we partake in the way the system works instead of taking advantage of it.
So no. It is not a bribe. It is a choice.
Bribing would be a bum on the side of the road trying to convince you to give him $10 for nothing. No other job has to “bribe” you to pay for services you use. You just do it. So paying your waiter is not a bribe at all. If you choose not to, that is your choice. And sure, you may looked down upon for it, but that is the waitstaff’s choice and everyone else’s choice, too.
But in the end, it’s NOT a bribe, and the two things you are trying to compare are still completely different and incomparable.
Just like you were being dramatic about counting out the tip as it being “work”, you are being overly dramatic about comparing leaving a tip to affecting the lives of women in foreign countries.
In reply to Brittney
“The government bureaucrats don’t get paid to do their job, or not REASONABLY, and most people don’t consider that fact as a bribe to get money out of their pockets.”
Sadly many people in certain countries say exactly this.