It never fails to shock me how a tip is demanded in the US. People simply refuse to listen to reason when we (yes, there are others!) tell them that leaving a tip isn’t necessary. Well, I’m hoping for too much here, but if you’re a waiter, here are 5 reasons why I will try my best not to give any money to you and why the reasons for tipping are crappy.
1. You act as if you’re my best friend
Just leave me alone ok? I don’t want to bloody chit chat with you. I want food. FOOD! Get it? It’s a restaurant. I go there to eat. I go because I want either Italian food, Chinese Food or something else which I can’t get in a McDonald’s. So I come to a restaurant to fulfill my cravings for it. I will pay for what I value – food. Not you.
Christ, you offend me – kneeling down next to my table, pretending to like me and chatting as if you’re my best friend when it’s obvious that all you’re after is the tip! I’m not a bloody money bag you know. I will pay the bill which includes the cost of the food, the environment and the salaries of the people involved – nothing more.
The only way to get money out of me that I don’t have to legally pay is by prying it out of my cold dead hands…
Bottom line: I don’t want to know your name, or interact with you for any longer than I have to in order to place my order. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the equivalent of a conveyor belt that brings me my food and a computer into which I input my order. Of course, I won’t be rude. But don’t expect me to interact with you any more than I would with some stranger.
Image Credit: cafemama
2. You don’t get paid enough
And this is my problem how exactly? It’s astonishing that customers are expected to make up for your employer’s cheapness in not paying you a decent wage. Please include the full cost in everyone’s bill thank you very much. I’ll pay it because I have to and the charge is there for me to see.
What’s really funny here is that no one seems to criticize the employers! All criticism is reserved for non tipping customers instead of the owners of the restaurant for not paying a decent wage. Wtf! Could it possibly be because you guys know you can make much more by tips and under report your income to the IRS?
3. You’ll spit in my food if I don’t tip you?
And I’ll shoot your kid if you don’t give me a million dollars. Seriously, am I even hearing this right? You’re actually using the threat of blackmail to make me pay you? Well as long as you’re openly claiming to be a criminal it’s all right I guess.
Fortunately that’s why I prefer buffets. Listen apart from it being illegal, this shows your poor integrity. But if you spit in someone’s food because they didn’t give you money you didn’t earn, then you’re a loser and deserve to be a waiter for the rest of your life.
4. Bringing me my food isn’t worthy of being paid extra
Did you cook it? Did you invent it? No. You picked it up and brought it to me. While it might not be easy, there are plenty of jobs which are much worse – shop floor workers for example. And I’ve been a shop floor manager, so I know. Face it – compared to other jobs, being a waiter is unskilled. You get paid what the market will think your services are worth. You don’t deserve more for your work over and above what your employer should pay you.
5. Money doesn’t grow on trees
I expect you to be grateful and pray for me at night if I tip you 10%. Be happy I gave you anything at all. I worked for the money in my wallet and by giving you some I didn’t have to, I’m doing you a favor. Learn to remember that when people give you something they don’t need to, it’s a favor. You don’t complain that they didn’t give you more!
By the way, the same thing above applies to all professions that demand tips including those on cruise liners.
So now that you understand why I won’t give you money you don’t deserve, stop with the “oh how could you?” attitude. I can. And I will.
Update: Here’s a rebuttal of the many silly justifications for tipping that people have given in the comments section.
to be fair, bhagwad jal park is just another sand nigger who is from a place where restaurants only sever buckets of shit with flies on it.
I’m so glad I get a good hourly wage so pieces of shit like you do not bother me as much. Your face is out there now and you are probable on every servers shit list. Enjoy eating floor dust, spit, and the possible snot rocket, You earned it!!!!
Go to the grocery store…cook your food…wash your dishes…make your cocktails buy beer and refill your water…got no problem with that….or admit that you’re a cheap bastard looking for an excuse to not tip…my guess is if the server did just the opposite you would find a reason to bitch…cause that’s what you are…a bitch…never had to really work for a living….how’s mommy and daddy? Or if they’ve passed you just keep on hanging onto what they left ya…for every one of you there are 10 people who make up for your ignorance.
First of all I would like to start of by disclosing that I have worked in the food service industry for 18 years fast food, fine dining, you name it. I do it because I love it, obviously not because of the money. Us servers are here to be your advocate. We make sure your thirst is quenched, your order is properly placed, and you get exactly what you order, if it isn’t correct please tell us, we would be happy to make sure you get exactly what you are paying for. We also are not here to be your friend, most of us are probably being nice to you because in general we are nice people. Not robots or part of some assembly line.Contrary to public belief we DO have souls. Perhaps you have no desire for human contact or you just despise people in general. But when we are nice to you it is because we are generally nice people and we want you to enjoy your experience. No hustle, at least on MY end. In reference to your comment that “we don’t get paid enough” I have never said that to a customer, EVER. Most people in general feel they aren’t paid enough. Threaten to spit in your food? As far as I know just threatening that is grounds for dismissal for just joking about it in any place I have worked. Go ahead, don’t tip. No big deal, luckily most patrons aren’t as uncouth as you are. I try to go above and beyond for each one of my customers and I also respect their desire to be left alone. Even if you don’t tip me and you return you will still receive the same level of service from me each visit. And lastly, “money doesn’t go on trees”. Really? It doesn’t because the food you order doesn’t just magically grow where you are seated either. Lame comment. If you despise being bothered with human contact so much then please order delivery or take out or drive through. Dealing with you is probably harder for us than it is for you.
5 words for you !! YOUR A PEACE OF SHIT !!!
Hey, Asshole. Tipping is part of American culture. It’s not a legal requirement, but it is a human/ethical/courteous one. You don’t understand or agree with it because you don’t understand basic capitalist economies.
In the United States of America, we tip servers. It’s not your fucking place to ask why or denounce it. If you choose not to tip, that’s fine. Just know this: Servers remember non-tippers like you. And, when they see you again, you’re God-damned right your food’s gonna be fucked with. Bon Apetite, Jackass.
Just sounds like a ridiculous reason to be cheap…
Restaurants have a system- the food is cheaper because gratuities are based on service. Not because they are optional. You are self indulgent and selfish! You “reasons” all prove only your selfishness. In other countries servers don’t always receive tips because they make a fair wage. It’s not “extra”. If we didn’t have this system you’d pay more as a standard. This system is based on the fact that we’re a capitalist country. I like how you blogged your nonsense reasons to make yourself feel better. I bet your mom is super proud you grew up to a selfish dick!
Your a dirt bag. And no I’m not in food services.
This blog has got to be the worst blog I have ever read!!!!! Your ignorance makes me sick if you do t like Americans or America go the eff home. Your cheap and there is far more that just picking up an order. Also did you know those buffets you love so much are filled with discusting germs poor grade food and not to mention people such as your self……. Get some class!!!!
Cheers!