It never fails to shock me how a tip is demanded in the US. People simply refuse to listen to reason when we (yes, there are others!) tell them that leaving a tip isn’t necessary. Well, I’m hoping for too much here, but if you’re a waiter, here are 5 reasons why I will try my best not to give any money to you and why the reasons for tipping are crappy.
1. You act as if you’re my best friend
Just leave me alone ok? I don’t want to bloody chit chat with you. I want food. FOOD! Get it? It’s a restaurant. I go there to eat. I go because I want either Italian food, Chinese Food or something else which I can’t get in a McDonald’s. So I come to a restaurant to fulfill my cravings for it. I will pay for what I value – food. Not you.
Christ, you offend me – kneeling down next to my table, pretending to like me and chatting as if you’re my best friend when it’s obvious that all you’re after is the tip! I’m not a bloody money bag you know. I will pay the bill which includes the cost of the food, the environment and the salaries of the people involved – nothing more.
The only way to get money out of me that I don’t have to legally pay is by prying it out of my cold dead hands…
Bottom line: I don’t want to know your name, or interact with you for any longer than I have to in order to place my order. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the equivalent of a conveyor belt that brings me my food and a computer into which I input my order. Of course, I won’t be rude. But don’t expect me to interact with you any more than I would with some stranger.
Image Credit: cafemama
2. You don’t get paid enough
And this is my problem how exactly? It’s astonishing that customers are expected to make up for your employer’s cheapness in not paying you a decent wage. Please include the full cost in everyone’s bill thank you very much. I’ll pay it because I have to and the charge is there for me to see.
What’s really funny here is that no one seems to criticize the employers! All criticism is reserved for non tipping customers instead of the owners of the restaurant for not paying a decent wage. Wtf! Could it possibly be because you guys know you can make much more by tips and under report your income to the IRS?
3. You’ll spit in my food if I don’t tip you?
And I’ll shoot your kid if you don’t give me a million dollars. Seriously, am I even hearing this right? You’re actually using the threat of blackmail to make me pay you? Well as long as you’re openly claiming to be a criminal it’s all right I guess.
Fortunately that’s why I prefer buffets. Listen apart from it being illegal, this shows your poor integrity. But if you spit in someone’s food because they didn’t give you money you didn’t earn, then you’re a loser and deserve to be a waiter for the rest of your life.
4. Bringing me my food isn’t worthy of being paid extra
Did you cook it? Did you invent it? No. You picked it up and brought it to me. While it might not be easy, there are plenty of jobs which are much worse – shop floor workers for example. And I’ve been a shop floor manager, so I know. Face it – compared to other jobs, being a waiter is unskilled. You get paid what the market will think your services are worth. You don’t deserve more for your work over and above what your employer should pay you.
5. Money doesn’t grow on trees
I expect you to be grateful and pray for me at night if I tip you 10%. Be happy I gave you anything at all. I worked for the money in my wallet and by giving you some I didn’t have to, I’m doing you a favor. Learn to remember that when people give you something they don’t need to, it’s a favor. You don’t complain that they didn’t give you more!
By the way, the same thing above applies to all professions that demand tips including those on cruise liners.
So now that you understand why I won’t give you money you don’t deserve, stop with the “oh how could you?” attitude. I can. And I will.
Update: Here’s a rebuttal of the many silly justifications for tipping that people have given in the comments section.
You are a sick person. Just thought I’d let you know . I hope people always spit in your food. Servers probably make more money than you working your lame retail job . $300 a night ! That’s right get with it . Your an idiot you think you compare mc Donald to an upscale enviornment . You pay for service when you go out . But you obviously don’t get out much lol
unbelievable how self centered this guy is. Don’t you realize that if you upped the standard wage of restaurant workers as you suggest, that the price of any food or beverage goes up with it? There are good,bad,exceptional and terrible workers in all walks of life. In AMERICA we accept that to tip for service in varying amounts is how our culture works.You control the amount. My suggestion to you is to look in the mirror and ask why are you so self centered that you would believe that a single mother of, doesn’t mater how many should have her income determined by you. Since you only think of yourself. Don’t forget what goes around comes around.
“Did you cook [the food]?”
Haha! So the author tips the cook, right? What a jag…
Wow…. I don’t even know what to say to that. You’re a horrible person and it saddens me to know that people like you exist. The service industry people work their butts off preping stocking and cleaning so you can have a nice experience when you fo out to eat. if you don’t want human interaction and just want food how about don’t be lazy stay at home and cook your own food. Then you can keep your negative piss poor attitude to yourself. You sound like a miserable person and I feel bad for you that this is how you think.
In reply to bartender27
See the problem is, I am a lazy person so no way I’m going to cook my own food. Even ordering take out is problematic because I need to wash dishes afterwards. I just want someone else to take care of all that. Ergo, restaurants.
I realize waiters work hard, and I respect that. But I’m a customer of the restaurant. I don’t contract the waiter’s services separately. The waiter is part of the establishment that I visit, and I pay whatever is required to on the bill.
Isn’t that the way things should work?
In reply to bhagwad
No… You’re a fucktard… Buy fast food and stop complaining. I feel sorry for whoever would ever be dumb enough to marry a piece of shit like you. Seriously. You are everything wrong with the world. Literally. Not exaggerating. You need to not be alive. Everyone who comes in contact with is a worse person for it. And whatever religion you subscribe to… I’m sure your deity feels the same way about. Eat a bag of disease, and go die in a field alone and worthless like you have obviously lived you’re life.
In reply to Dustin
Lol. Quite a harsh sentence on someone who disagrees with your views on tipping don’t you think? :D
Good thing you’re not a judge or responsible for framing law I guess!
In reply to bhagwad
That was way more than one sentence, and I disagree with you as a person. You literally are scum. And fucking CRAZY UGLY by the way. Just to throw that out there. You’re morally corrupt, have no regard for anyone else, and for someone who calls himself a writer, a very poor grasp on grammar, syntax, conjugation, and sentence structure. You fail at life. So once again, please, go die miserably, ugly, and alone.
P.S. Youre beard looks like hair on testes. That is all.
In reply to Dustin
Lol. One of the sweetest comments I’ve ever had on my blog :)
Btw, look up “sentence” in a dictionary. You’ll be surprised at what you find. New learnings eh? :D
In reply to bhagwad
What’s crazy is punctuation ends sentences. There were several of those in there. You’re literally the worst kind of dumb, the self assured and wrongly cocky… You’re like napoleon with a huge gut and bad skin, minus at least 70 IQ Points. It’s ok though, here in the US, we don’t classify the mentally handicapped as untouchables and force them to hunt rats. Sometimes we even let them have blogs and promote their hideouslyerror riddled (opinionated and grammatically) rants.
In reply to Dustin
Ooooh, feel the burn :D. I feed off your outrage. Thankyouthankyouthankyou.
In reply to bhagwad
Wow… Borderline illiterate and touches himself to insults? Watch out ladies… This guy’s the total package. And don’t worry, he only hits women because he loves them.
In reply to Dustin
this man is an indian. some *lucky* bride’s family will pay him to marry her. she has no choice. i feel bad for her too.
In reply to Angela
Aaaawwww – you’ve created a pretty little imaginary opponent in your head. Good for you! Is he appropriately evil?
In reply to bhagwad
says the guy who is deleting my comments. go play a game or something. you clearly have no friends, no life and your hands are tired of jacking off that sad excuse for a penis. i guarantee anyone you tried to have sex with would get more sensation from a super plus tampon.
In reply to bhagwad
Dude, in what way do you think your opinion on this matter is not evil. Whether or not you agree with the system, that’s how it works. You are literally STEALING from a server when you don’t tip them. They have to tip other people based on what you order. So you are making that server pay for the privilege of serving your obnoxious fat ass. That’s theft. And that makes you a bad person. A bad person is also known as EVIL. Plus you’re still CRAZY FUCKING UGLY
In reply to Dustin
“You are literally STEALING”
Amongst your many talents, I don’t think you understand the word “literally”. Treat yourself to an xkcd comic and chill: http://xkcd.com/725/
In reply to bhagwad
Well yea but they don’t work like that… In Europe it works like that though. Here it would put all those restaurants you love so much out of business.
In reply to bhagwad
Is that the way they SHOULD work? Yeah, probably. It’s how they work in many countries, actually. But, here in America, that is not how it works. The government has federally mandated that employers can pay their employees less than minimum wage because they know that the customers will tip them and they will be able to make up the difference between hourly wages and minimum wage. Many wait staff make over minimum wage in spite of their hourly pay solely because of tips. Without tips, wait staff do not make a liveable wage.
If restaurants were paying their employees above minimum wage, you would be paying far higher prices for your food. One of the reasons you can eat at whatever price point you eat at is that there is a very low overhead for wages, which keeps running costs down for employers and means that they can charge closer to cost for the food that you are served.
In reply to Someone
Perhaps you should be aware of the fact that according to the department of labor guidelines, if a waiter doesn’t make enough in tips to reach at least minimum wage, the employer has to make up the balance amount. Of course, this rarely happens because they inevitably end up earning far far more than the minimum wage.
Is your name really bagwad? Because it seems to suit you!
Wow. Never go to anything other than buffets and fast food places then. Waiters are paid less because you are expected to pay the difference. Those waiters work for YOU. You don’t want to pay them? Fine. Don’t use their services.
I can here after seeing the title and thinking “oh, it’s gonna be like ‘I don’t pay if you pick your nose then touch my plate’ or ‘if you ignore me and make me wait 15 minutes there went your tip’.”
You’re an asshat. Seriously. I hope you get a job as a waiter and serve people like you all day. Or die in a fire. I’m good with either.
Basically you’re a cheap fuck, a bad person, and an unbelievable asshole. You could have just saved us all 5 minutes and typed just that and we would’ve gotten the picture. If you can’t afford to tip, you can’t afford to go out to eat. Fucktard
Alright you want to know the best reason to tip? It keeps YOUR cost down. Servers typically get paid 4.35 an hour (at least in AZ). IF the owners of the establishments where we work increase our pay to 7.25 an hour (which is by the way the lowest minimum wage, not the average) that is a $2.90 raise for EVERY single server and the bartender. Lets say 3 servers plus the bartender. That is $11.60 per hour; $139.20 if the establishment is open for 12 hours a day. If open 7 days a week 360 days a year this adds up to $50112 per year. Now where do you think this extra money is going to come from? It’s not going to be out of the owners pocket. That kind of extra cost would shut down a LOT of places. The money to cover that is going to come from your pocket and I promise it will be more than 20% (which is a good tip). So save yourself and everyone else some money and leave a tip. Also I don’t try and be your best friend. My goal is that you have a wonderful dining experience.
Awww this is so cute. The funniest part is that you get paid to write. So you probably just wrote this to get peoples attention. Which worked…. Now since you have no idea what you are talking about I challenge you to actually get a job waiting tables because everything you are writing is so incredibly ignorant. Good luck getting a job waiting tables because believe it or not you need very specific skills to do this job.
I really just think you need a hug. You poor little thing. No one has ever shown you how to love. You are very pessimistic and whiny…
Boo hoo I need to add up a percentage extra and I don’t feel like it because I don’t understand the value of the service being provided to me. Awww I don’t want to follow the cultural norms of this country. Awww I don’t realize that when I sit down to eat at a restaurant I am entering into an implied contract where I pay the waiter for their SERVICES.
Now if you can’t do the math… Just ask your waiter (Kindly-with manners) to add the gratuity at the end of your meal.
In reply to The Waitress
The thing is I would never be a waiter because I don’t want to take up a job where my income depends on the largess of random strangers. So your little experiment ain’t gonna materialize :)
In reply to bhagwad
So…… you are willing to tell others how to live their lives without trying to walk in their shoes? I beat you don’t believe racism and sexism exist either
In reply to Carl Jackson
Excuse me, but how on earth did I tell anyone how to live their lives hmm?
In reply to bhagwad
Because you’re so busy writing phenomenal blogs and amazing book reviews
In reply to Angela
Gaming too. Don’t forget online gaming.
In reply to bhagwad
you’re probably just as bad at gaming as you are at writing.
Mad props, man!! Completely agree.