Waiters are understandably upset about why I don’t tip and have given many illogical reasons in support of this ridiculous practice. Here’s a rebuttal of the most common ones.
Bullshit 1: We only Pay for the Food. Service is Extra
The menu price doesn’t include just the cost of preparing the food and paying the chef. It includes the restaurant setting, the tables, the cutlery, the effort and investment that the restaurant owner has put into the dining area. Now guess what? Since I’m paying for it, the restaurant has to give it to me. And how do they accomplish this?
Waiters. Ding ding!
See without waiters, the restaurant has no way of delivering the dining experience to me that I’m paying for. I’m paying for sitting down in a nice place. I’m paying for the air conditioning. I’m paying for the nice tablecloth and for my food to be delivered to me in a reasonable time. The menu price covers all this. Waiters are just the restaurant’s way of bringing me my food. Of fulfilling their part of the contractual obligation.
Bottom line. Servers are not independent contractors. They’re not an “extra” that you have to pay for. By hook or crook, the restaurant needs to deliver the product. Whether they use waiters or conveyor belts (a term that many seem to object to), is not my business. I don’t care. The waiters can just melt into the background and let me enjoy my food in peace. If the menu includes free refills or whatever, then waiters are required to deliver that as well. Why? Because…wait for it….I paid for it!
Bullshit 2: It’s the custom. It’s ‘merica!
Yeah right. You do realize that not all customs are created equal don’t you? Slavery was a “custom” back in the day and so was race and sexual discrimination. Anyone with an ounce of integrity does what they feel is right. There are many harmless customs in the world like bowing instead of shaking hands, or using chopsticks instead of forks etc that are morally neutral. It really makes no difference if you follow them or not.
But tipping? Hell no! It’s not morally neutral. If you get better service because you’re a good tipper, then you’re essentially paying a bribe to servers to get them to do their job properly next time. All customs have a limit. And tipping is such a convenient custom isn’t it? Hell, I wish I had a custom in place for people to just throw money at me.
And just in case someone feels I don’t appreciate the US, there are many great things about this country that I love and I’ve blogged about repeatedly. Freedom of expression, the way Americans show respect to their armed forces, the politeness of people as you walk by on the road, the work culture, the individuality.
I just don’t like tipping. It’s not as if a person has to blindly accept everything in a country without judgment. There are good things. And there are bad things. Just like everywhere else.
Bullshit 3: The cost of food will increase dramatically
Someone needs to do basic math. Increasing the price of food to pay minimum wage to waiters will not double the price of food. Some have even gone so far to claim that it’ll increase 4-5 times. Ridiculous. Totally, utterly ridiculous. Let’s dissect this rubbish.
As an example, I’ll take Chili’s. A waitress at Chili’s was so kind as to comment saying that the price of food at her restaurant will increase by 3 times – $30 for a $10 burger. Using the statistics she herself gave in her comment, there are 12 waiters (at full capacity) who need to be paid minimum wage. That’s $5 extra per hour per waiter making it a net total of $60 per hour that has to be added to the price of food on a full day.
$60/hr? For 12 waiters. That’s it! It’s peanuts. If you assume even that each waiter is serving just four tables. That’s $5 an hour extra they have to make from four tables. Even if we say that each table sits for a massive two hours, the extra paid per table is way less than $5. On the total bill. Worst, worst case scenario.
You know what? Customers won’t even notice. So stop the garbage about the prices of food going up several times to pay minimum wage. It’s utter nonsense. The only reason waiters don’t want this system in place is because they earn a hell of a lot more than than minimum wage using our tips. And they come across as the victims.
Waiters are Struggling Mothers/Students
Look, it’s not as if I don’t have sympathy for those who struggle in life. I just don’t think it’s my problem. And I specially don’t like it being impinged upon me. Generosity is one thing. Having money demanded from you is something totally else. Any tip I give is out of the generosity of my heart and I expect some gratitude for helping those in need. It’s not something I have to do since…refer to Myth 1.
Bottom line: Socially mandated tipping is a scam. I can’t believe how intelligent people have been hoodwinked into it. Probably because they like to come across as “nice” people and feel sorry for servers who hover around looking expectantly. Well, I find that irritating and I won’t buy into it.
Just out of curiosity, why is it expected to o tip waiters and waitress when they already make actual menial wage in California? Minimal wage here is $9/hrs. So, I don’t see the point in tipping if they’re making full minimal wage. I don’t see the reason to tip here if that is the case because tipping is only required for waiters and waitresses who make like $3/hrs. Perhaps I should stop tipping. I don’t tip anyone else who makes the same amount of money as well as doing hard work. Do I tip the hotel maid? No, she’s already making minimal wage (however that is expected too which I don’t understand). People are paid to do a job. This act of entitlement is disgusting. That people cannot even civilly debate without name calling. Why do you have to tip 20% anyway? Who the hell made up that rule? I certain have to be expected to tip THAT MUCH for someone just bringing me food and my drink. That is to expensive. It’s like paying for another person for dinner. This whole saying “If you can’t afford to tip, you can’t afford to blah blah blah” is the reason why I don’t want to tip. People should not tell me what I should do with my money that I WORK FOR as well. I make $9/hr at my job but I don’t get tipped at all. I just do my job that I was HIRED to do. Nowadays you see tip jars everywhere as well. If you pay with a card you have to see a stupid tip line on there. How does making coffee deserve a tip? You don’t see anyone tipping McDonald. Or nursing assistants who work hard as hell and have to deal with body fluids and grumpy patients. Do they get tip for helping someone to the bathroom? No.It is part of their job. And it is a lot harder then being a waiter or waitress. You don’t have to worry about body fluids and cleaning up a mess that a patients make all over the hospital bed.
I’m sick of it. I’m sick of worrying who should I or should I not tip. You are paid by someone to do a job! And in that job you’re suppose to do this or that and not expect anything but payment from your employer not the customer.
Writers like this is the reason the US should stay out of other countries problems and … Go eat a cow Bhagwad! Maybe we should have let your family suffer during the Sino-Indian War and I could name a dozen other examples of how India’s culture is flawed and needed US help(like economics)… Readers remember they are not all born equal there… It’s a Caste system and he just want to be on top.
In reply to KevO
Please go ahead and criticize “my culture”. I don’t care! I do it myself on my blog all the time like this: http://www.bhagwad.com/blog/2015/rights-and-freedoms/we-need-to-murder-indian-culture.html/
In reply to bhagwad
Make me curry bitch and shut the hell up about tipping.
In reply to bhagwad
Hey towel head, go “jihad” on some goats ass, which is what you’re good for, then stay the fuck out of America, goat fuck ing piece of shit terrorist
In reply to Rick cantina
Please excuse this racist asshole from being American. He certainly doesn’t represent all of us with his offensive remarks.
In reply to Rick cantina
Hah! Losers up there can’t even keep their racial stereotypes straight! No wonder they’re stuck waiting tables! No higher education…People from India aren’t usually terrorists, they aren’t “towel heads,” and are not generally Muslim. But by all means, keep showing us how you should just stay in service work…
In reply to bhagwad
bhagwad – I really think you need to stop commenting on your own post until you can back up your opinion with facts. I have made several comments loaded with facts and why you should tip and even challenged you to educate yourself or come up with a decent response to my comments. Well its been a while and still no response sir.
The fact of the matter is that you refuse to tip because you are cheap and for some reason feel like you are above the culture you decide to live in. “When in Rome” sir.
Bhagwad.
Exactly what purpose do you serve to this country aside from denigrating the people who live and work within it? Precisely what makes you better; above those you encounter in all our walks of life? Are you of Godly lineage? Do you speak in a Divine Tongue? Do you bring with your opinion a temperance that which we lesser Folk fail to understand?
Do forgive me, but I find you parochial and judgemental; this is bothersome. Your hyperbole thinly veils your prejudice toward the country you profess to adopt.
Thoughts?
In reply to Rita
And it’s his opinion, on his blog. Are you really saying he can’t have an opinion, on his own blog? Seriously? Get over yourself.
I am in total agreement w/you. I worked as a waitress ever summer through college and it was NOT the hardest job I had. It sucked but I did my job well regardless of whatever tips I was going to get, so I would not be fired for performing poorly. Don’t get me wrong – I loved getting big tips (who wouldn’t??), but recognized that customers should not be the ones subsidizing our wages,
In reply to Belinda
Is a waiter in a restaurant, most often servers tip out 5% of their total sales to their assistant servers,and bartenders irregardless of what they get an actual tips. So if I wait on you and you spend $100, leave nothing for the tip, I essentially lose out on $5 for that hour. Plus it is nice to have someone in actually invested into your experience. Having someone who can give you in-depth knowledge of pairings with wine and food, allergies, customizing your experience to suit your needs. I’m assuming you’ve had limited experience with phenomenal service. Perhaps your perspective will open up and you will change your ability to receive it and fully appreciate it.
In reply to Kendall
Um, I’m sorry, but that’s not what most servers do. Unless Applebee’s, Olive Garden, IHOP, and Chili’s do that now? Places like that is where waiters usually work.
In reply to Cathleen
There’s no bartenders at IHOP but yes most all these places do require you to tip out the bartender and/or bussers. In a hibachi restaurant the tips are split 50/50 with the chef and still they are not paid hourly just the chefs are. So educate yourself before walking in a restaurant and demanding someone to work for you for free aka slavery. Get a to go order and clean up your own mess and serve your own drinks if you don’t want to tip for these things.
In reply to Kendall
Irregardless is NOT a word in English…the word is regardless…off topic, I know, but annoying nonetheless..
In reply to Kendall
i’m sorry but that service it’s what i pay for (included in the bill) or … should i bring my own waiter (since i’m supposed to pay his wage and the bill)?
In reply to Belinda
I am not fully sure you understand how the tip system works. You may have worked as a server but chances are you were never explained how this system works and why it works so well.
There is a lot to it but one of the main reasons it is around is this: Food costs and wages. (Using Colorado based wages and just accounting for the server, not the chefs or anything else) Your $10 burger – $4 to pay the server = $6 profit. Without the tip system you are looking at $10 – $8 = $2 profit. To make up for the loss in profit to keep the business running you need to make up $4. So you charge $14 for a burger. Originally you would have been expected to tip $1-$2 in tip but now you forced to pay $4. Customer pays more without say and may still not receive the service they hoped for.
Its much more complicated then this but its a easy way to show one of the ways why the tipping system came to be.
In reply to Brian
And what about a 15$ glass of wine or a 30$ dish? Everything about demanding tips to cover wages is stupid, but applying a percentage rule is utterly stupid
In reply to Belinda
Customer tips are the sole means of a servers income not a subsidized add on. I’m sure you were compensated for your work in the past aside from tips which is how restaurant USED to work. Things have changed dramatically in recent years. unless you were paid 2.13 an hour previously which was taken entirely by the government for taxes and received a check stub every week that said VOID I honestly could care less what your previous experience was as a server. Your use of the word “waitress” tells me it wasn’t that recent and you have no current understanding of what the job is like a present. Educate yourself.
Like you said you have the choice to tip and not doing so is completely fine. If you don’t want the extra service and you don’t plan on tipping let them know! You are paying for everything else including me bring your food but the rest of the service experience isn’t including. So instead of continuing to vomit these useless words that most people don’t agree with, just tell your server your not going to tip. He or She will provide what you payed for and absolutely nothing more. They will not chat with you, they will not kneel next to you, and they will not pay attention to you. Just as you requested. So you as customer can choose to only recieve what you paid for and us as waitresses can choose to only serve for what were paid for. All of this isn’t quite the disaster you’ve all made it out to be, most everyone is going to tip not always fairly but what is this ones guys opinion matter? I do my job because I love it, I love talking to people and making sure people have a great experience. If this guy came in and told me straight up he wasn’t going to tip, cool here’s your food eat it pay for it and leave so I can take care of my next customer. My husbands in Afghanistan for his 4th time, trust me everyone one guy choosing not to tip (yes I know there is more than just him) is hardly as big of a problem as you make it.
In reply to Ariana
I think he’s more trying to help servers. Servers should be paid minimum wage just like every other job, instead of making the customer decide arbitrarily how much money servers make. The service you as a server provide is one that should be included with the experience of going to a restaurant. You do your job and that is to provide excellent service to the patron entering your domain. If servers were paid a regular wage, tips could still be a thing, but now they would always be a pleasant surprise instead of sometimes pissing you off and ruining your day. Of course no one is going to come in and tell you they are not going to tip because they still want decent service. Tipping is like this weird bribing tactic to make servers do better than they normally would. The service should be the same across the board, whether you’re getting a tip or not, that’s what the restaurant would like of you I’m sure.
Anyone reading this, check out this video:
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=q_vivC7c_1k
In reply to Ariana
What does your husband being in Afghanistan have to do with anything? Do you work that in to random conversations? Why? Typical “Dependa.” And yes, my husband deployed too. I just don’t feel the need to use it justify anything, to get sympathy, or to look important.
I want to start out by saying that I love taking care of and interacting with people. Sure, it hurts my feelings when I make a guest truly enjoy their experience by going above and beyond only to receive no tip, but I realize it is part of the job. That being said, I would like to point out a possibility you may not have realized. If servers were to be paid hourly, the managers/owners of restaurants would likely schedule fewer of them to save on labor costs. Add to that the fact that your server would not feel the stress to earn a tip as they work a larger and busier section, they may not be so inclined to move as fast to accomodate your needs as they would if their income truly depends on your level of satisfaction. Did you know that a tip is to insure prompt service? I understand that it is not a perfect system, but does taking it out on a person who is trying to make a living and having such callous feelings towards another human being really make you feel good about yourself? To all of the people who have said such terrible, hateful things about people in the service industry I truly do feel sorry for you. Either you have a very unpleasant life that makes you spiteful to others or you have lost your humanity somewhere along the lines to show such disregard to another person. I may be a lowly, humble server but at least I am happy and have compassion for others. Now that I have said what I felt needed to be said, I will take my leave of this hate filled thread and go back to positive living. May you all find peace and happiness in your lives. ☺
The fact is, the author is a hypocrite. I say that because in his country, tipping is known as Baksheesh. That’s tipping in India. In fact it’s very customary. As well as bribing the man to stay off their back. We grat their tables when they come in because like all Indian groups that enter, they order tons of food, take 2 bites of each, leave a ton of leftovers and a big mess, don’t bother to box any of it up and never tip. They ask 10 tons of questions are very, very particular on how they want everything laid out not giving a damn how many customers are waiting on the same server. Meanwhile the waiter/waitress makes $4 an hour and taxes are slapped on that as well as tips. It’s called Wages, Tips and Earnings (Sound familiar my fellow Americans?). So yes, the server smiles despite your many rude gestures and grits his/her teeth, they return promptly with the food you ordered just the way you like it… Including “WATER NO ICE!!!” So yes, waiters and waitresses work their asses off for you to pig out and leave a big mess, but be respectful and leave a tip. If you are not looking to tip or too worried about money, then cook at home, don’t waist our time. Guaranteed that waiters, waitresses and bartenders remember faces. The next time they see you, they definitely show you their dissatisfaction by taking their sweet time in serving you next time, or telling you, “Sorry, table is reserved.” sounds harsh, but we have businesses to run and customers to take care of. If you want to be a customer and you enjoy the food and the fact that you have been waited on hand and foot by a waiter or waitress who’s been running around on their feet for the past 8-10 hours and still providing you a smile and a greeting, then give a little baksheesh and stop being so stingy.
This thread is really hilarious. I am european visiting the US often and i always have the perennial fight with cab drivers and waiters why i do not tip them. In Europe we do not tip and we get excellent service, so much for the correlation between tipping and service quality.
The other thing that annoys me is this fake friendly attitude of waiters. I do not know you, i do not want to know you, bring me my food and let me enjoy my meal.
In reply to Nicholas
Wait. I’m confused. In Europe you only pay your waitstaff and can drivers less than minimum wage? And why did they female bathroom attendant in the Marseilles airport have a tip jar and scream at me in French when I bypassed the tip plate?
In reply to Jim DeVinney
They’re there for americans. They love to tip and feel great for it!
In reply to Nicholas
Your servers also get paid minimum wage or higher. Ours do not.
Also ever heard of the phrase “When in Rome” ?
If you are visiting here then you have probably changed a lot of other behaviors. You have already switched currency, possibly cell number, driving culture and laws, and time of day you even eat. While some of these are laws most of them are culture driven. So why is tipping the one you decide you don’t have to pay attention to? What makes you so high and mighty you decide what cultural traditions or ideas you have don’t have to follow. I will admit Americans travel a lot and do their fair share of messing up on following cultural guidelines but two wrongs don’t make a right.
Tipping is a set in place system grown from a cultural system. How about you respect our culture and laws and tip. Not asking you to like it just be respectful. Ultimately its your call but maybe inform yourself about a countries culture before you visit. Most travelers do their best, maybe its time you do the same.
In reply to Nicholas
So you’re just a shitty tourist then, congrats. Your culture doesn’t always apply to where you travel, you have to adjust to the norms.
In reply to Nicholas
Nicholas thanks for showing me that the Ugly American is no longer an American icon. I applaud you for showing me that it isn’t only Americans that struggle with cultures outside the us. It is refreshing to know that there are idiots from other cultures. Thank you sir for bioengineering an idiot.
In reply to Nicholas
What a bag of dicks you are. Just had to say it as it is. Having been to europe a few times myself… Why do you have tip jars? This is America… We are a different, and quite frankly, the greatest country in the ?. Patriotism aside, we have customs here that differ. You are an ambassador of your country when you visit the US. Your actions contribute to an overall consensus of your fellow Europeans.
In reply to Nicholas
Well this is not Europe and the reason HERE in America tips are used to Insure Service is because servers are not paid an set rate like those from where you are from. Their only income is the tips they receive from customers. So if your in America not tipping then you are allowing someone to work for you without paying them which is immoral no matter where you come from. If you don’t want to participate in the system that the States utilize to pay the restaurant employee’s then don’t eat in a restaurant. If you don’t want to follow the rules then why be here? You seem to enjoy the way Europeans treat dining in so therefore you should eat in European restaurants and make your own food when here in America or get a togo order.
Do you feel the same way about delivery drivers, that use their personal car to bring you food?
It’s your decision not to tip but I can say with near certainty that the servers unfortunate enough to have you as a diner don’t find out about your no tipping policy until the meal is finished and you fail to leave a gratuity.
Have the courage and conviction in your beliefs to inform your server before hand of your no tipping ideal. Just tell them upon being greeted that although you aren’t going to be rude, they are nothing more than a computer for your order and a walking conveyor belt and you will not be leaving a tip.
I mean that seems fair right? Instead you soak up the friendly service and smiles, knowing the server is working under the assumption that a tip is going to be left. It’s deceitful. You know you will not be tipping yet your taking advantage of a system based upon tipping.
It’s the equivalent of being a member of the church and not tithing. You enjoy the services of the church. You sit in the heated or air conditioned pews, receive wine and wafer, enjoy church sponsored meals, etc. You take advantage of a system based upon giving.
In reply to Ryan Patrick
Well said. It was a nice counter point & it was done in a respectful manner. I agree if you’re not going to tip be honest and upfront about it, but also dont be surprised or upset if your service declines a bit. As a server for many many years I have waited on many “non tippers” some are very friendly, but I’ll be honest if I’m busy and I need to put things in order that non tipping table will ALWAYS be my last priority. Again just being honest, I’m there to make money and if a table doesnt tip in my mind there just not as important as those tables that help pay my bills.