I found how to live in a meaningless universe!

Three weeks ago, I had finally figured out the universe was meaningless. Depression came over me as I realized everything was going to just end – the stars, galaxies, and even black holes would all be gone. Nothing would be left except for space filled with random photons.

How can I live with this knowledge? I love my life and everything I see. I’m thrilled to see light in the Universe and the thought that a time would come when there would be no more light for all eternity was horrifying. No one says this better than Goethe in Faust:

The Devil:

A modest truth do I declare.
A man, the microcosmic fool, down in his soul
Is wont to think himself a whole,

But I’m part of the Part which at the first was all,
Part of the Darkness that gave birth to Light,
The haughty Light that now with Mother Night
Disputes her ancient rank and space withal,

And yet ’twill not succeed, since, strive as strive it may,
Fettered to bodies will Light stay.
It streams from bodies, it makes bodies fair,
A body hinders it upon its way,
And so, I hope, it has not long to stay
And will with bodies their destruction share

It’s my habit to stay awake for some time before going to sleep – just thinking. And for many days I kept turning this over – how could I find a way to be happy when everything I loved was going to end and never even be remembered?

Finally, I recalled something I always knew. My life, the earth, and the present universe exist because of the laws of physics. The very same laws in fact that will kill it. So there are two options. Either I have things as they are now and the knowledge of all coming to an end, or…nothing! Which would I choose? When I thought of it like that, it was a no brainer. It’s better to live and die, than not live at all.

The problem was in my thinking it was somehow wrong for everything to end. It’s not. That eventual end is what’s keeping me alive now! Instead of railing against it, I should thank my stars for being able to exist and take a look around before I sink into oblivion. Opposites which depend on each other to exist. Yin and Yang.

So nothing’s changed. The facts are the same. The conclusion is the same. We’re all going to die and there is no ultimate meaning in anything we do. It’s only my perception that has changed. I now view my life and this pretty universe as a lucky chance that has no business claiming immortality. It’s enough that we came, we saw, and went. More than that is just greed.

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Comments

  1. Good to know Bhagwad that you atleast fear death. I always believed that an intellectual like you will always be ready with the understanding that your life is but a role that you play on this stage and move on…but was a bit surprised to see that just an understanding of world going to end brought you on the verge of depression.

    Reply

    • In reply to Sajid

      Sajid, I feel that most people who are not afraid of death don’t really realize they’re going to die one day. I mean really really realize it. They may know it intellectually but not comprehend it fully.

      Yuddhishtira told this to the Yaksha when he said that the most amazing thing in this world is that thousands of people die every day and each person thinks he/she will live forever…

      Reply

  2. Universe is meaning less that I agree with you. Is life meaningless overall ? That question bothers me as it creates and echo for suicide. Still breathing and reading your blog. What Goethe had written in Faust is only half truth, the remaining half is its opposite. Bhagwad sir, understanding gives meaning to life and takes away soul of life from it.

    Reply

  3. ” But I’m part of the Part which at the first was all, ”

    if the
    ‘ which at the first was all ‘ – forever is
    ( because it is ‘ which at the first ‘

    then
    being a part of The Part
    you are a part of the ‘ was all ‘

    right ?

    Reply

  4. These kind of questions never bother me :)

    //It’s enough that we came, we saw, and went.// Maybe that’s not enough, but then since we have no choice why waste our time feeling bad about it :)

    Reply

    • In reply to Indian Homemaker

      It’s only those who’re jobless and have too much time on their hands (like I do) who think such stuff :D . But for people like us, they’re very real problems. Most others I think are so busy that there’s opportunity for this sort of angst to rise up…

      I may be wrong, but maybe not.

      Reply

  5. Read Dr Brian Weiss’s Many Lives, many masters. You’ll feel much better.

    Reply

  6. You aren’t alone!!! Many many texts and lots of research seems to have gone into this. Maybe religion was created to answer such questions…

    Reply

  7. That was a profound piece of introspection, something I wouldn’t have been capable of :) I would have fretted maybe, but not agonised over it! A good post. enjoyed it :)

    Reply

  8. there might exist a matrix consisting of a play of thought energy that does not depend upon whether your visible physical body exists or not. in this context – what does it matter whether this visible physical body lives or dies ?

    Reply

  9. The Greek philosopher Thales, when asked: why he chose to continue living after saying there was no difference between life and death; replied “Because there is no difference.”

    Reply

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