{"id":3573,"date":"2013-03-12T17:55:46","date_gmt":"2013-03-12T12:25:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bhagwad.com\/blog\/?p=3573"},"modified":"2013-11-18T23:58:35","modified_gmt":"2013-11-18T18:28:35","slug":"the-huge-opposition-to-marital-rape-laws-is-shocking","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bhagwad.com\/blog\/2013\/rights-and-freedoms\/the-huge-opposition-to-marital-rape-laws-is-shocking.html\/","title":{"rendered":"The Huge Opposition to Shocking Laws on Marital Rape"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Criminalizing marital rape is a no brainer. There&#8217;s no need for even the phrase &#8220;marital rape&#8221; to exist. We don&#8217;t have &#8220;marital murder&#8221; after all. It&#8217;s just murder. The relationship of the victim to the perpetrator is completely irrelevant. Son, daughter, husband, wife&#8230;these are all irrelevant. And yet&#8230;so many people seem to be against the very concept that a man can rape his wife. <a href=\"http:\/\/articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com\/2013-03-03\/vadodara\/37409514_1_international-women-s-day-women-leaders-women-organizations\">Even the government doesn&#8217;t think so<\/a>. They think it&#8217;s not &#8220;genuine&#8221; rape. Why not? The definition of rape is &#8220;sex without consent&#8221;. How does the marital status enter the equation?<\/p>\n<figure style=\"width: 261px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Government's Misplaced Priorities\" src=\"https:\/\/lh6.googleusercontent.com\/-4SlKuuIEN7k\/UT8emuHF8TI\/AAAAAAAACFo\/DVuvzsUJZWU\/s271\/Government%27s+Misplaced+Priorities.jpg\" width=\"271\" height=\"180\" \/><figcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Government&#8217;s Misplaced Priorities<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>There are a few main lines of argument used against the idea of marital rape. First, that there&#8217;s no way to prove that it happened. While it&#8217;s true that there can difficulty collecting evidence, this is a red herring. Start by defining the crime, then we&#8217;ll think about how it should be proved. As of now, a man can openly claim in public that he violently rapes his wife all the time and the law cannot touch him!\u00a0<em>That<\/em> is the problem.<\/p>\n<p>Second, people say that when a woman gets married she agrees to have lifelong sex with her husband. That&#8217;s bullshit. A woman is not a personal sex slave. She will have sex with her husband <em>if and when she feels like it<\/em>. A wife is not a prostitute to whom a man pays money and gets to have sex with whenever he wants. If the man feels that his wife is not sexually active enough, he is more than welcome to sit down with her and talk about the problem and if nothing else works, apply for divorce. If he tries to force himself on her he is a criminal plain and simple regardless of what the shocking laws say. Sometimes the legal system is an ass and deserves to be ridiculed. This is one example.<\/p>\n<p>Third, the government feels that the introduction of marital rape laws will &#8220;destroy marriage&#8221;. Let me point out that the government has no Constitutional mandate to protect marriage. It\u00a0<em>does<\/em> however have the duty to <em>protect the rights of its citizens!<\/em> Which is more important?<\/p>\n<p>Many are afraid that laws addressing marital rape will be abused by women much like the anti dowry one- section 498A. There is good reason to be concerned about this. But the solution is to have well drafted laws that are less amenable to abuse. Not to forgo the very idea of a legislation itself! We can shift far more of the burden of proof onto the person making the accusation for example because in a marriage, consent is presumed unless stated otherwise. I&#8217;m sure there are other legal safeguards we can come up with. But not having a law is unacceptable.<\/p>\n<p>The true motive behind the opposition to marital rape might just be the resistance to a woman&#8217;s sexual autonomy. Men and even women are brought up with the idea that marriage is a license to have sex whenever the man wants. And that by refusing it, the woman is not doing her &#8220;duty&#8221;. Implicit in this line of reasoning is the notion that sex is not something that women enjoy. That they only do it for children and after that they don&#8217;t want it anymore. Instituting the idea of marital rape raises the specter of a man going for long periods without sex even though he&#8217;s married! I mean what&#8217;s the point then, right?<\/p>\n<p>I now understand what the government meant when it said they were &#8220;protecting marriage&#8221;. What they they&#8217;re defending is not marriage <em>per se<\/em>, but the warped <em>idea<\/em> of marriage that Indians have. For them, marriage is just a license to have socially accepted sex. Allowing women to say &#8220;no&#8221; takes that away from them. In the future, they might *gasp* actually have to <em>try and be nice<\/em> to the woman, make her feel wanted, and be romantic. You can&#8217;t treat her like dirt and still exercise a god given right to use her body when you want.<\/p>\n<p>And that sense of entitlement is probably the true reason for this resistance.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Marital rape in India needs to be a criminalized NOW. It&#8217;s plain absurd that a woman can be treated as a sex slave without any autonomy of her own.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3573","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-rights-and-freedoms"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>The Huge Opposition to Shocking Laws on Marital Rape<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Marital rape in India needs to be a criminalized NOW. 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