It never fails to shock me how a tip is demanded in the US. People simply refuse to listen to reason when we (yes, there are others!) tell them that leaving a tip isn’t necessary. Well, I’m hoping for too much here, but if you’re a waiter, here are 5 reasons why I will try my best not to give any money to you and why the reasons for tipping are crappy.
1. You act as if you’re my best friend
Just leave me alone ok? I don’t want to bloody chit chat with you. I want food. FOOD! Get it? It’s a restaurant. I go there to eat. I go because I want either Italian food, Chinese Food or something else which I can’t get in a McDonald’s. So I come to a restaurant to fulfill my cravings for it. I will pay for what I value – food. Not you.
Christ, you offend me – kneeling down next to my table, pretending to like me and chatting as if you’re my best friend when it’s obvious that all you’re after is the tip! I’m not a bloody money bag you know. I will pay the bill which includes the cost of the food, the environment and the salaries of the people involved – nothing more.
The only way to get money out of me that I don’t have to legally pay is by prying it out of my cold dead hands…
Bottom line: I don’t want to know your name, or interact with you for any longer than I have to in order to place my order. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the equivalent of a conveyor belt that brings me my food and a computer into which I input my order. Of course, I won’t be rude. But don’t expect me to interact with you any more than I would with some stranger.
Image Credit: cafemama
2. You don’t get paid enough
And this is my problem how exactly? It’s astonishing that customers are expected to make up for your employer’s cheapness in not paying you a decent wage. Please include the full cost in everyone’s bill thank you very much. I’ll pay it because I have to and the charge is there for me to see.
What’s really funny here is that no one seems to criticize the employers! All criticism is reserved for non tipping customers instead of the owners of the restaurant for not paying a decent wage. Wtf! Could it possibly be because you guys know you can make much more by tips and under report your income to the IRS?
3. You’ll spit in my food if I don’t tip you?
And I’ll shoot your kid if you don’t give me a million dollars. Seriously, am I even hearing this right? You’re actually using the threat of blackmail to make me pay you? Well as long as you’re openly claiming to be a criminal it’s all right I guess.
Fortunately that’s why I prefer buffets. Listen apart from it being illegal, this shows your poor integrity. But if you spit in someone’s food because they didn’t give you money you didn’t earn, then you’re a loser and deserve to be a waiter for the rest of your life.
4. Bringing me my food isn’t worthy of being paid extra
Did you cook it? Did you invent it? No. You picked it up and brought it to me. While it might not be easy, there are plenty of jobs which are much worse – shop floor workers for example. And I’ve been a shop floor manager, so I know. Face it – compared to other jobs, being a waiter is unskilled. You get paid what the market will think your services are worth. You don’t deserve more for your work over and above what your employer should pay you.
5. Money doesn’t grow on trees
I expect you to be grateful and pray for me at night if I tip you 10%. Be happy I gave you anything at all. I worked for the money in my wallet and by giving you some I didn’t have to, I’m doing you a favor. Learn to remember that when people give you something they don’t need to, it’s a favor. You don’t complain that they didn’t give you more!
By the way, the same thing above applies to all professions that demand tips including those on cruise liners.
So now that you understand why I won’t give you money you don’t deserve, stop with the “oh how could you?” attitude. I can. And I will.
Update: Here’s a rebuttal of the many silly justifications for tipping that people have given in the comments section.
Servers are paid a minimum wage of 2.13 an hour. You think the employers are being cheap. Maybe, but what you aren’t thinking about is the fact that servers make up the majority of staff. Paying servers 2.13 an hour and asking that guests at the very least pay a 10% tip keeps your bill lower. Higher wages mean higher costs for running the establishment. Higher costs mean higher food rates. I imagine if you had to pay 15 dollars for a burger you know should only cost you ten you could then rant about that. Maybe you’d even forgo eating out as to protest and save all servers everywhere from having to deal with your rediculous notions. You complain because servers give you their name. They’re told to introduce themselves so you know who to ask for (or complain about) when you have a need. They bring your drinks they do their best to ensure your food is what you asked for, they bring you refills. They fulfill every desire you have when it comes to the food you’re eating and they do this for 20 people at the same time. They work their butts off and you don’t have the decency to tip them for it. Servers are not uneducated losers. Ninety percent of the time they are divorced mothers who gave up going to school in order to care for their children while their husbands worked. Now they’re on their own without the benefit of a college degree or years spent building a career and they’ve got bills to pay. Serving is a very popular highly needed job and it’s an easy job to get when you’re on your own broke and have kids to feed. They don’t want to be on welfare they need a job and they get one as soon as they can. You’re a heartless bastard.
Im a server and i bust my ass to support my kids. And i can guarantee you that i more then likely make more money then you do! You wanna act like servers are uneducated. Sounds to me like you may need to go back to school yourself for a course in common sense! If you dont wanna tip take your cheap ass to mcdonalds! Oh and restaurants dont set the pay rate for there staff! They go by state minimum wage laws for what they set as a servers mimimum pay rate is! Educate yourself before you run your mouth and judge others! You are whats wrong with this country now days! I bet you wouldnt have the balls to say this to your servers face.
I wont spit in your food. Ill knock your pathetic ass out!
Not declaring tips…ok..how about we all quit waiting tables and then you can work and all the money you pay in taxes can pay for my food stamps and welfare!!
OMG I TOTALLY AGREE WITH ALL YOUR POINTS OF FACTUAL INFORMATION!!! Said no one, ever.
Love your name, by the way. Totally suits you.
I beg both of you to just give a serving job a summer’s chance; at a restaurant with a deck on water. Give it a shot, if you’re willing to stoop so low. Try running across the entire restaurant for a side of mayo, for refills, try diffusing unhappy customer situations, making sure food at 7 different tables (I did this last night) is correct, and come back and tell us whether you deserve a tip… If you can even get a job at a restaurant with your amiable, caring, accomodating personalities..
These are prime examples of why (I wish) customers would mark on paper how much they’d tip BEFORE servers started their job. Then you’d see the kind of service you intend to pay for.
And last time I checked, the economy sucks right now, right? Or am I wrong? People take jobs they can get just to get by, and if serving is it, then so be it. Have some respect for servers. I know some that are in college and trying to get by, I know some that have college degrees but can’t get a ‘professional’ job right now too..
Douche Bag
Who the fuck are you and why are you on my facebook shithead?
Fine sir. As a server, I say stop tipping me. Tell restaurants to pay their servers better… and when we get a decent wage, see how fast your food price shoots up. Seriously, you know how much a burger would cost we got paid minimum wage? Over $20. Don’t expect fries. Or for me to make any substitutions. Because I no longer care.
We servers work their asses off and do a lot more than you give us credit for, which means your lazy face has never even worked in a restaurant. I bet you sit behind a desk all day… soo harrdd. I’m working my way through school and which people like you would just stay at home and cook your own food. Since you’re so money conscious and unfriendly, it’s cheaper and you can be alone.
In reply to Wow
“Don’t expect fries. Or for me to make any substitutions. Because I no longer care.”
Absurd. We all do our jobs for which we get paid. Do shoddy work and get fired like the rest of us.
I stumbled over this while roaming around on FB & while its an old blog post, I am still compelled to respond.
I am absolutely astounded that anyone from ANY part of our developed world has a problem with tipping your server, or tipping anyone in a service related type industry. Of course it’s your prerogative not to do so, but is like to know if you step over homeless people & kick abandoned animals too.
No, tipping isn’t “MANDATORY”, you tipping your server is an acknowledgement that your service was good. Lets talk about what SERVICE entails shall we? First of all, you like getting a drink with your meal right? Maybe it’s a hot day, water beforehand is excellent too. Who brings you these beverages? Your server. Now, moving along, picking your food would be difficult with no menu, am I right? Who brings that item to you, removing it so as not to have your table cluttered? Your server. Next, after looking at the aforementioned menu, while enjoying your tasty beverage, you decide what you want. Who’s going to place the order w/ any special requests, answer questions you (might) have & get your food to your table? Oh. THAT’S RIGHT! Your server, without him/her, how would you let the kitchen know what you want? Smoke signals? Who’s going to fill your drink when you run out? Your server. Who clears your table if you decide maybe that you want dessert? (Dishes, those bad boys get in the way in a hurry don’t they?) Your SERVER. If you have a problem, and I’m guessing with your fantastic disposition you’ve had your share, who do you turn to? YOUR SERVER.
I’ve never been a server. Why? I couldn’t do it. My husband is one & has been for over 12 years working in fine dining establishments. I’m not a stupid person but I’ll admit it if I cannot handle something. And serving I couldn’t. Try work a double shift, meaning 10 to sometimes 14 hours a day. You’d think okay, I could handle a few days of that, give me a lunch break & I’ll be somewhat refreshed to plow through the evening shift. WRONG. Servers typically do not get a “lunch/dinner break”. Why? They are assisting the restaurant and its other staff in prepping for the evening clientele. Things like helping bus tables, breakdown tables & reset them for evening or large parties, polishing silverware, drying & resetting glassware for the bar, cleaning/straightening table set ups & that’s a small sample of what they are required to do before they take a break during a double shift. More often than not by the time the side work is done a server might have 30 minutes before evening shift starts. 30 minutes to eat, relax, smoke, get a breath of fresh air, whatever they can do in that small amount of time.
Servers are not dumb people. And it’s not always just a last resort job, my husband ha known many people in fine dining that have been serving many years & some that retired quite comfortably after years of serving. It’s more than dropping glasses of water at your table, getting your order, slapping food on the table & walking away. At fine dining establishments there’s the wine menu to know/understand, how to show the wine & serve it properly to a party, how to decant the wine if its over a certain age, because no one wants cork floating around in their glass after expense they shell out for the bottle.
Serving is a hard & thankless job. A server greeting you is annoying? You think they’re trying to be your best friend? They’re being POLITE, courteous. Them crouching at your table give you a rash? Many companies REQUIRE they crouch in order to be at the clients eye level. Or in your case to sink down to your level is more appropriate. Asking you questions during the meal an issue? They want to be sure your food is correct, good & that your enjoying it. If a server didn’t do these things for you when you are out at a restaurant I’m 99% sure you’d complain about them NOT greeting/inquiring/preparing “properly & in a polite manner”.
People like you? They’re never satisfied. But, that’s your right & you are free to exercise it. Just keep in mind that the majority of our 50 United States have the server wage at $2.13 & HAVE HAD IT $2.13 p/hr since 1991, the last time Congress generously “bumped” the tipped minimum wage up by a few cents, literally, just a few cents. The restaurant industry isn’t trying to swindle you w/ this “urban myth” of tipping. Since 1966, (in the US) a sub-section of the minimum wage has existed for people who work for gratuities. This was established by Congress & the D.O.L. mind you. The idea, I’ll go s—l—o—w—l—y so you can grasp it, is that any person who makes over $30.00 p/wk in tips earns the tipped minimum wage rate, a rate that has had only 1 minuscule increase in 47 YEARS, while the standard federal minimum wage has increased quite a bit more. For the tipped minimum wage earners should their tips plus the tipped minimum wage rate NOT equal the applicable minimum wage their employer IS required by law to make up the difference getting the tipped worker TO the minimum wage rate. This practice is rarely followed & an alarming number of tipped workers have no idea this law exists.
So, still looks like paying servers federal minimum wage across the board looks best right? Wrong. If you consider that Congress doesn’t implement timely increases to reflect inflation TO minimum wage, then compare real & nominal wage values based upon this fact, the end result is that the current federal minimum wage rate of $7.25 is equal to what was paid in 1960.
You still following pumpkin? Bottom line, a tipped worker is paid much lower but the opportunity to make more money through tips gives them the chance to make more money. Or I’m some cases not, like if all customers were cheap dickheads like you. In closing, servers work hard, are intelligent & perform a service that ensures YOUR experience is the best it can be. If that doesn’t warrant a tip, I don’t know WHAT does. That being said, I do realize this is a cultural thing. I read you from Delhi & caste systems are alive & kicking there. Which is horrible. I don’t care who you THINK you are, I’m telling you that you’re not any better than the girl who bags your groceries or the man who shines your shoes. And so on…..To think that a practice like a caste system is still thriving anywhere in the world shows how underdeveloped THAT location is regarding their mindset & the general understanding of how to treat & respect all individuals.
If you respond I’m sure you will cuss at me or be insulting, tell me how WONDERFUL Delhi is, blah, blah, BLAH….and that’s fine. I’m sure it’s FABULOUS. So fabulous that I think you should take your money and go back there……
Have a lovely day.
In reply to Jaded
Life is tough eh? Welcome to the real world.
And the only one doing the insulting here is you.
I hope thus author ends up serving one day. I bet he will because this attitude will get you fired from any job! Wages are determined by laws by the way….. Not only do we put in the effort to pretend to be your friend but we also make sure your drink is full, your food order us correct before it hits the table and mostly importantly make sure the food is hot or cold as necessary. We are servers not servants.
all we would