Why Your Reasons for Demanding a Tip are Wrong

Waiters are understandably upset about why I don’t tip and have given many illogical reasons in support of this ridiculous practice. Here’s a rebuttal of the most common ones.

Bullshit 1: We only Pay for the Food. Service is Extra

The menu price doesn’t include just the cost of preparing the food and paying the chef. It includes the restaurant setting, the tables, the cutlery, the effort and investment that the restaurant owner has put into the dining area. Now guess what? Since I’m paying for it, the restaurant has to give it to me. And how do they accomplish this?

Waiters. Ding ding!

See without waiters, the restaurant has no way of delivering the dining experience to me that I’m paying for. I’m paying for sitting down in a nice place. I’m paying for the air conditioning. I’m paying for the nice tablecloth and for my food to be delivered to me in a reasonable time. The menu price covers all this. Waiters are just the restaurant’s way of bringing me my food. Of fulfilling their part of the contractual obligation.

Bottom line. Servers are not independent contractors. They’re not an “extra” that you have to pay for. By hook or crook, the restaurant needs to deliver the product. Whether they use waiters or conveyor belts (a term that many seem to object to), is not my business. I don’t care. The waiters can just melt into the background and let me enjoy my food in peace. If the menu includes free refills or whatever, then waiters are required to deliver that as well. Why? Because…wait for it….I paid for it!

Bullshit 2: It’s the custom. It’s ‘merica!

Yeah right. You do realize that not all customs are created equal don’t you? Slavery was a “custom” back in the day and so was race and sexual discrimination. Anyone with an ounce of integrity does what they feel is right. There are many harmless customs in the world like bowing instead of shaking hands, or using chopsticks instead of forks etc that are morally neutral. It really makes no difference if you follow them or not.

But tipping? Hell no! It’s not morally neutral. If you get better service because you’re a good tipper, then you’re essentially paying a bribe to servers to get them to do their job properly next time. All customs have a limit. And tipping is such a convenient custom isn’t it? Hell, I wish I had a custom in place for people to just throw money at me.

And just in case someone feels I don’t appreciate the US, there are many great things about this country that I love and I’ve blogged about repeatedly. Freedom of expression, the way Americans show respect to their armed forces, the politeness of people as you walk by on the road, the work culture, the individuality.

I just don’t like tipping. It’s not as if a person has to blindly accept everything in a country without judgment. There are good things. And there are bad things. Just like everywhere else.

Bullshit 3: The cost of food will increase dramatically

Someone needs to do basic math. Increasing the price of food to pay minimum wage to waiters will not double the price of food. Some have even gone so far to claim that it’ll increase 4-5 times. Ridiculous. Totally, utterly ridiculous. Let’s dissect this rubbish.

As an example, I’ll take Chilis. A waitress at Chilis was so kind as to comment saying that the price of food at her restaurant will increase by 3 times – $30 for a $10 burger. Using the statistics she herself gave in her comment, there are 12 waiters (at full capacity) who need to be paid minimum wage. That’s $5 extra per hour per waiter making it a net total of $60 per hour that has to be added to the price of food on a full day.

$60/hr? For 12 waiters. That’s it! It’s peanuts. If you assume even that each waiter is serving just four tables. That’s $5 an hour extra they have to make from four tables. Even if we say that each table sits for a massive two hours, the extra paid per table is way less than $5. On the total bill. Worst, worst case scenario.

You know what? Customers won’t even notice. So stop the garbage about the prices of food going up several times to pay minimum wage. It’s utter nonsense. The only reason waiters don’t want this system in place is because they earn a hell of a lot more than than minimum wage using our tips. And they come across as the victims.

Waiters are Struggling Mothers/Students

Look, it’s not as if I don’t have sympathy for those who struggle in life. I just don’t think it’s my problem. And I specially don’t like it being impinged upon me. Generosity is one thing. Having money demanded from you is something totally else. Any tip I give is out of the generosity of my heart and I expect some gratitude for helping those in need. It’s not something I have to do since…refer to Myth 1.

Bottom line: Socially mandated tipping is a scam. I can’t believe how intelligent people have been hoodwinked into it. Probably because they like to come across as “nice” people and feel sorry for servers who hover around looking expectantly. Well, I find that irritating and I won’t buy into it.

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Comments

  1. beth says:

    If you don’t want to tip then don’t. But don’t go out where tips are expected. So you can eat at McDonald’s or Taco Bell, you can cook yourself, hell you can order take out from any restaurant! Just leave the tables open for customers that aren’t tightwad douches. I love working as a server. I do it on Saturday nights to supplement my income and because I enjoy it. I wouldn’t do it for minimum wage though! I probably average $20 dollars an hour with wages and tips. That’s good money and well worth the work. So next time you consider how much a restaurant would have to pay servers if they weren’t going to be tipped don’t base your math on minimum wage but the $20 – $25 an hour we really work for. Asshole.

    • Deborah says:

      I’m sure that it wasn’t your intention, but your comment confirmed this author’s entire point of view.

      • Chi says:

        I don’t think she confirmed what the author said. I think the author is speaking from a place of ignorance and I’m not really angry about his POV, I find it kind of comical; like the Westboro Baptist Church. We can only speak on what we know, and he does not know the service industry and honestly, just sounds like an individual who doesn’t tip just to spite, and the forcefulness of his rant makes it hard for me to believe he’s “Of course, not rude” to waiters :/ Whatever you believe is what you believe, but the elitist overtones are what is disturbing to me. If you don’t tip a server, we can’t really do anything about it (like spit in a guest’s food b/c from what I understand the check comes near the END of service) so…why so angry w/ servers? Comments like waiters are “conveyor belts,” and that we “…deserve to be a waiter for the rest of your life,” come out of left field. I was expecting to read a concise, CONSTRUCTIVE argument on reasons for not tipping and I was actually intrigued to hear an educatef side of the argument and what I came away w/ were insults generously nuzzled within a 7th grade rant. I may be willing to read another piece of his rubbish, though…after he’s spent 6 months in the industry :)

      • kali says:

        I think the biggest thing the author fails to understand is that with tips servers don’t make minimum wage. If you are only taking into consideration raising the cost of servers wages up to actual minimum wage the only people that are going to be willing to be servers are the same high school kids that you give orders to ad McDonald’s. Nothing wrong with high school kids, but they tend to be more flaky, forgetful, and less likely to give you good service.

      • Upnorth says:

        “Servers don’t make minimum wage”. Put that total lie on the list of reasons ignorant servers expect to be tipped. There is not one single state in the US of A that allows tipped employees to make less than minimum wage (other than the occasional exemption for owner’s family employees, trainees, temporary/seasonal teens, etc). If you’re making less than minimum wage, someone is breaking the law.

      • john says:

        I think he sounds like nigger

      • Brian says:

        What your mouth! Stop being a racist and offer factual opinions. We live in the age of equality and if you still think the color of someones skin makes them any different from someone else then please just go home and stay there and dont have kids.

    • Bigpoppa says:

      So you just flat out said that the tipping system benefits you more? So your giving this man shit for not paying you extra for a job that’s only worth $7.25? I tip whenever I can but people forget that tipping is supposed to be a reward for a waiters going above and beyond not just for doing the job itself. I build people’s houses, it’s much harder work and pays 10. I’ve never been tipped for going above and beyond let alone for just doing my job. It’s a cold world man most of us have to earn high paying jobs

      • Jimmy says:

        You can tip to those who worked hard to provide a good service for you. You don’t have to tip the bad ones, though if you feel pity, tell the server to be a better one to get more out. What I tend to do is see how the service goes. At best 20% for those servers who go beyond their way to help me. At worst 10% or none for those who are just plain rude.

      • blake says:

        The part you aren’t understanding is that you aren’t going to get “service” of any kind from anyone making minimum wage. If I went to work to bartend tomorrow and my boss told me that I would be making $7/hour I would quit.

      • Inger says:

        I manage a club. And our bartenders start off at 8 an hour. And “service” is what is expected. Waitress jobs are a dime a dozen and usually pay a lot less. And most bartending jobs around my neck of the woods pay barely more than waitress jobs. But this is cake work! unskilled jobs. Easy peasy. If I had you in my club and you didn’t provide the same service to both tipping and non tipping customers I would fire your ass. Plain and simple. and before you think I get paid a lot of cash to say this, I don’t 9 bucks when I bartend 10 bucks when I am working the manager shift. And tips are a big income for me, but as I tell my customers. I get paid an hourly wage. If you don’t want to tip, don’t. Everyone needs to stop cry babyin’ and get a better job if you aren’t happy with getting paid so little. Or go to the management/ owners and try for something better.

    • JoShandra says:

      At least at McDonald’s when workers make the NOT REQUIRED effort to bring my tray over to my table, they don’t expect any tip. or when they are nice just because. or when they come over to ask if the food is ok. and apparently THEY MAKE LESS MONEY than most of the servers posting bragging about $20-25/h.

      I’m just saying it shouldn’t have to be in your job requirements, or require a tip, for you to just be a nice person I would hope you all don’t require above minimum wage just to be a good person and serve your customers.

      • Phil says:

        I don’t think a McDonald’s worker who spends 30 seco ds with a customer is the same as a server who spends 30 minutes to an hour with multiple tables. Nect time you go to a restaurant with a server, tell them you’ll collect your food from the kitchen, refill your own beverage and pay up front. Oh and you’ll sit at the dirty table that hasn’t been cleaned all night. $20-$25/hr is reasonable for a nice family restaurant server. I’m all for removing tipping, but servers would have to be paid in guaranteed wages then, which means food bills go up. But really, not that much if you consider that $20-25 an hour is split between the 4-5 tables a server runs per hour. Thats $5-6 a table, and assuming an average of 4 people a table is $1.25 increase per meal. Now if you want somewhere that only pays minimum wage, you should expect McDonald’s quality service, i.e. eating on a bench, picking your food up at a counter, and refilling your own beverage. Its fast food for a reason.

      • JoShandra says:

        ok… ill just reiterate. I would rather dine in a place with kind people than a place that is whatever all that was you just said.

        can’t you just do your job description without it requires a tip beyond the amount you signed up to work for. no one wants over-entitled, under-appreciative, rude people crowding their table for tips. who aren’t even willing to fill their job description, or be a nice person without that tip.

        (so yes, i want McDonald’s quality servers. they are nice)

      • Brian says:

        Then just go to McDonalds. As you just said you want their kind of services so why are you even going to restaurants in the first place?

        Comparing servers to fast food workers is a joke. Like Phil said if your server acted like a person from McDonalds you would be getting everything yourself. All your server would do is bring your first drink, your food, and take your payment. We wouldn’t take your order, we wouldn’t ask if your food was good, we would just see you twice and take your money. If that all my job was then ya sure I would be more then happy to be paid a flat minimum wage and I would do it with a smile on my face all day.

        However that is not the case. I study for food tests and drink tests before I can even take a table, go through about 2 weeks of training to figure out the computer system and learn where each item in the restaurant can be found. Then we get to serve people that for some reason don’t use please and thank yous and use gestures that if you used to normal human beings you might get slapped in the face for using.

        There is much more behind being a server then just taking your order. We have to know the food, take your order, make sure you like it, do this all for at least 4+ tables at a time all while changing the experience for each persons personality.

        Employers also do not have control over how they pay servers. The government has control over that. Plus if you want to pay us a flat rate and add 18% straight into food costs by all means I am game. You just payed me 18% regardless of my level of service. I think you want some control over that.

      • Inger says:

        HA! the government has nothing to do with raises. The company you work for could start you out at the real minimum wage instead of server minimum wage. Trust me. i am considered a tipped employee and the company I work for starts out more than minimum wage. Because they care about their employees. Obviously your job doesn’t have that quality. It isn’t the customer’s fault. Ya it sucks when people don’t tip me. But I do not expect them to. Did you know that those poor waitresses that need tips and make 20-25 dollars an hour actually make more than STNAs? Ya, you know, the ones who wipe asses and give showers… just saying. If anyone should get tipped it isn’t waitresses or bartenders.

      • Brian says:

        I am going to enjoy this. One the government has a HUGE handle on how much tipped employes make. That being said I never said my company does not start me above what the government says is a minimum wage for a tipped employe so your argument basically just went to shit but I will still show you how much control the stat has anyway.

        Each state decides it own minimum wage based on living expenses and so on. For my state Colorado that is $8.23. A tipped employe must make a least minimum wage for hours worked. Since you must receive a paycheck of recorded hours and be paid for the hours you must now receive a tipped minimum wage. To do this effectively the state takes all recorded tips and takes the average. The average tips plus your your wage must now equal at least minimum wage per hour. You are also immediately considered a tipped employe if you receive a cretin amount in tips. For Colorado that’s $30 a month.

        As far as fairness in wages your example of STNAs is horrible. While the average pay for a STNA is about $10.00 a hour their benefits easily make up for that number. The average server brings in about $20,000 to $25,000 a year. The average STNA income + benefits equals close to $40,000 a year. While a STNA does not have direct control over that money, the resources it provides is. They choose not to be tipped and stay a hourly employ therefore they may not accept your tips. So its not that they don’t deserve them.

        I am looking forward to your response. Facts always help your case.

        https://www.colorado.gov/pacific/cdle/tipped-employees
        http://www.payscale.com/research/US/Job=State_Tested_Nursing_Assistant_%28STNA%29/Hourly_Rate

      • Marie says:

        that’s a flat out lie or horrible ignorance… the government only controls the MINIMUM.. not the maximum.. if you buy that ive got a nice bridge to sell you…and why in the hell do you think you would anywhere close to 18 percent of each check on a flat wage? You’ll be lucky if you get minimum wage from your cheap ass employer since hes got you convinced that he cannot pay you over that now. Raising the minimum wage for servers to the general minimum wage would add very little to the check, and most of that your employer would pocket, claiming increased administrative costs or somesuch. Unless you are a very bad server and work at a greasy spoon as well

      • Brian says:

        I can tell that your not very good at this whole debating thing. One never misquote your opponent. Never in my argument do I say they control the maximum or the minimum. “Employers also do not have control over how they pay servers”, the key word being HOW.

        Now for the rest of your argument and unchecked facts. “U.S. restaurant guests tip an average of 18 percent for good service, a study released this month indicates.” – http://nrn.com/blog/average-us-diner-tips-18-percent-study-indicates
        18% is the average of what a server makes in the US. Not only is this information gathered for research but also for the government. Your claim that I will be lucky to make minimum wage is ridiculous. Every person in the country that is working must receive at least minimum wage based on their state. So if a Tipped Employe (notice the caps here) makes no tips the employer must pay the difference to their Tipped Wage to make the two equal minimum wage.
        https://www.colorado.gov/pacific/cdle/tipped-employees
        Back to the first misguided argument you tried to make. The government controls how people are payed. In the state of Colorado if a person is handed $30 or more in the form of tips they instantly become a Tipped Employ. The employer has no say in this and this is why most profession do not allow tips. This allows them to better regulate and track a employs income. Now before you start comparing jobs let me explain why this is important. The better you can track a employs earnings the better you can manage and set up their benefits.
        This is why most tipped positions do not receive benefits. While they may make $20+ a hour the average server make $20,000 – $25,000 a year. Most serving jobs do not come with benfits so everything else is on you. However most college starting college degree jobs start you off around $10 a hour. Not only do they normally work more hours but because a company can track their pay they better because everything is claimed and the paycheck is almost always the same if not very close they can manage benefits. Most benefits sitting behind a college grad are about $20,000 a year. You do not have access to this money but the resources they provide are.

        Now for the last part of your very nonfactual argument. Raising minimum wage for servers will not change how much you pay for your meal. That is a different part of the business. That is food costs and Slandered Employ costs. The only reason minimum wage for servers goes up is when the states minimum wage goes up. All tips would still be yours regardless of the price in food. It is illegal for a employer to take your tips or earnings.

        “No employer shall make a deduction from the wages
        or compensation of an employee in violation of the
        Colorado Wage Act”

        And

        It shall be unlawful to deny presents, tips, or gratuities
        intended for employees in violation of the Colorado
        Wage Act,

        https://www.colorado.gov/pacific/sites/default/files/Colorado%20Minimum%20Wage%20Order%20Number%2030_0.pdf

        The only way they can take your tips is if they post a sign saying they do so.

        I urge you to read and think before you respond and to check and backup your facts. Otherwise your argument/debate is not either of those but a opinion and what I have said is fact.

      • Upnorth says:

        Sorry @Phil: apparently you don’t understand what a server does. A server’s job is to do those things you listed. That’s what they’re getting paid to do. It’s not my fault they agreed to be paid next to nothing. That’s why we have “minimum wage” statutes. The menu price in a sit-down restaurant already includes the service, unless otherwise indicated (e.g., “service fee of 20 percent for parties over 6″ and whatnot). If a server in that sit-down restaurant can’t provide the required level of service, knowing they may not get ANY tip, then they should be looking for a different sort of work, or expect to be fired immediately for doing a shitty job.

    • kimkim says:

      I started reading this blog and thought for sure I have to send this to all my American friends! I lived in the US for nearly 9 years and was often baffled by the attitude towards tipping. Early in the 2000s the IRS changed rules to try and force servers to claim more of their actual earnings. I love the server ‘s sense of entitlement. Can I suggest that anyone who takes a job with a variable which the customer decides on knows that there will be many ‘assholes’ who don’t give them what THEY expect. Have you heard of sales? Commission? What about commission-only jobs? You know why some people do not take those jobs? Because they do NOT want variable pay. The people that DO want to take those jobs usually have thick skin and are very driven to earn the maximum. You know what I love about living in Europe? When I go to restaurants I generally do not have desperate or over-eager or self-serving waiters or waitresses interrupting conversations or asking me while my mouth is full if everything is ok. Frequently there is an optional gratuity included…or not. Most people in service positions are paid a suitable wage and a tip is really an extra. Here’s another perspective for you, how do you feel when you go to pay for something that seemed like a reasonable price and then you see the real total once the tax has been added? Nobody likes that feeling…to many consumers the tip is like another tax. Now you mentioned the ‘assholes’ can choose to stay at home or choose to go to McDonalds etc if they don’t want to pay on time. Have you dear server always paid all of your taxes, on time? Have you always paid every one of your bills in full on time? Credit cards? If not…why do you think you are entitled to not pay for SERVICES YOU USED even when the full amount that you will need to pay is specified? If your internet got cut off wouldn’t you wonder why you were paying for it? That’s how people feel about additionally for bad service. Oh and once last question, when people go into your restaurant do they get to choose the server? I get to choose my hairdresser, my manicurist, cleaner, etc etc… but usually I don’t get to decide which table and which server. Anyway, be a grown-up and if you do not like the fact that your wage is variable…change jobs or lobby for change in the service industry.

      • Jim DeVinney says:

        Kimkim, when I go to Mexico I have a different expectation of my dining experience. I understand that i don’t have to tip,when in Rome…. You do get to chose your server and you can decline being seated at a specific table, most restaurants will accommodate reasonable requests as it is a capitalist driven society. But if you dont want to tip then say that upfront. That little bit of honesty will get you the level of service that you are asking for. The other part of your answer that is interesting is the “lobby for a change in the service industry” unfortunately in this society it is the consumer that must lobby for change. Unions, that are prevalent in other parts of the world have been demonized here so the workers can’t lobby without an internal struggle with their values. What I would like to see is to have the gratuity added to the bill that way you would be presented with one charge thus removing any issues with tipping. Since Tips is an acronym for To Ensure Prompt Service and was done to show a level of affluence in society it would be interesting to see how adding the 15 to 20 % to the bill would fare in a society that is increasingly leaning toward objectivism.

      • kimkim says:

        Actually it is not Ensure it is To Insure Prompt Service and stems from a time where people gave incentive to be served their tea properly hot. Lobbying for change is not limited to trade unions…having studied law in the US I can assure you that there are many things people can do to drive change which is exactly how many new laws are created in the US. Personally I frequently I tip well. I object to the feeling when in the US that even when service is bad and disruptive we are still expected to tip and particularly that research (and chats with honest servers) reveals many don’t declare all their tips. Something about the custom seems to have gone off balance…

      • Marie says:

        Actually you are BOTH wrong, its not an acronym at all, cause if it was, it WOULD be “insure” and insure doesn’t mean what you think it does heh.

      • PooCat says:

        “You know what I love about living in Europe? When I go to restaurants I generally do not have desperate or over-eager or self-serving waiters or waitresses interrupting conversations or asking me while my mouth is full if everything is ok. ”

        THIS^

        You know what I like about cooking my own food and eating at home? The food is always delicious, healthy, at-cost and the service is 100% excellent in a relaxed atmosphere. I have tried to like the restaurant experience, but is all twisted up in some buffoonery that only detracts from me enjoying my food in peace. Who is this asshole person who keeps interrupting and chiming in at the worst time? 10 out of 10 times, what I want is to get my own water, go pick up my own plate when the cook is done with it, pay my check when I am ready. Waiting for this person to do everything for you, like you are an invalid…it is just awkward and inconvenient, where is the appeal?

        My theory is that the entire server-served dynamic is a carryover from the days of slavery. It establishes an awkward power dynamic – I think that the served are supposed to feel pampered and socially elevated by the cheerfully obedient underling who depends on their kindness to survive.

  2. Casey says:

    Or even one week in the industry. Hell, a day would certainly help to enlighten this level of ignorance.

    • Upnorth says:

      “Ignorance”, Casey? You mean the ignorant sheep customers who simply pay an additional ridiculous percentage of their bill as a tip because someone told them it’s expected? How about pointing out that they ALREADY paid for the ordinary service in the menu price? Nobody has to work in a shitty job to know it’s probably a shitty job. But whose fault is that? The customer has no way of knowing how much the servers are being paid, if at all. What if the customers were to inquire, as they were being seated, “are you being paid fairly or are you expecting me to subsidize your employer’s payroll by tipping you later?”

  3. Mitchell says:

    I knew right off when I read the word “bloody” at the beginning of this article that it was obviously written by some snobby American-hating British socialist who doesn’t understand a lick about how money works. Go back overseas, nobody wants your selfish griping attitude here.

  4. A part time server says:

    I can’t believe that you can be this inconsiderate and ignorant. Please stick to buffets and McDonald’s. The less people have to interact with you, the better. It’s people like you that the rest of the good community has to pick the slack up for. I hope you don’t and won’t have kids.

    • Upnorth says:

      @PartTimeServer: If everyone were to take your stupid advice and avoid sit-down dining with servers, merely because everyone is EXPECTED to tip, then the entire business would fold up and blow away, as perhaps it should. Any tip is, by definition, optional. Only a greedy brat presumes he or she is getting a gift and will throw a tantrum if one is not forthcoming. The cost of service is included in the menu price. Your pay is not my concern. I did not contract your services directly — your employer did. I didn’t get a copy of your resume and references to judge your ability to handle my business. I couldn’t care less if you’re the unpaid homeless son of the owners or a retired millionaire doing service as a hobby. You cannot morally EXPECT a tip. Ever.

      • Brian says:

        Well Upnorth since this is a passionate subject for me I have subscribed to this thread and seen a lot of your comments as of late. Needless to say your facts may need some checking. I say needless because if you did check them you would know a lot of what you are talking saying is in fact, wrong.

        By living in the “US of A” as you have put it you have agreed to follow or understand the costumes of this land. The costume here is that you tip a “Tipped Employ.” Now this is where I see you have not read up on your facts. I live in the state of Colorado so all numbers I use will be in reference to Colorado. Minimum wage in Colorado is $8.23 I believe or very very close to that. That is based on what it costs to live here so it will very from state to state. You did get that anyone that is working will get paid at least that amount for hours worked correct. What you have wrong is where that money comes from. The full $8.23 a hour a server makes does not fully come from your dish price. Part of it does yes but for Colorado about $4.00 of it does the rest comes from you the customer. If it does not the employer must make up the difference out of pocket. Most of your food costs go to a Standard Employ. Yes there is a difference and a legal definition.

        A employ becomes a Tipped Employ anytime he or she receives $30+ in a month worth of tips. This automatically changes their status. This is why most professions do not allow tips. However there is enough of a costume of tipping for the US government to instill a set of laws that dictates the pay of employes that find themselves in a industry that calls for tips. So yes you are expected to TIP! In every way this should be something you should think about and consider part of your concern. Lets say that a server just likes to serve tables and has no interest in making money. He tells his customers not to tip him and have a good night and gave excellent service. My guess is that you would be very happy. You would return and this would continue until he got fired. Why would he get fired? He is doing a excellent job and people love their food and his service? Because the restaurant is loosing money to pay for the part of his paycheck you did not pay for.

        I have to go but I encourage you to read the following links and inform yourself. I encourage you to respond with FACTS, not opinions.

        https://www.colorado.gov/pacific/sites/default/files/Colorado%20Minimum%20Wage%20Order%20Number%2030_0.pdf

        https://www.colorado.gov/pacific/cdle/tipped-employees

        If you respond I will include my next informational lecture. How minimum for servers is set.

  5. Jenna says:

    Getting stiffed is a part of this server job that I chose. But for every dbag out there, there is 100 other people that don’t complain, or think they are getting robbed by feeling obligated to tip by Americas culture. They eat, enjoy their experience, pay the bill, tip and leave, and they for sure don’t write an article about it. Also, the few times I have been stiffed, the table next to them tips me extra because they feel sorry for me, having to deal with a douchebag. The majority of these “why I don’t tip” writers are just venting because deep down they’re pissed us wee little servers are making more than they are with a career they earned with a four year college degree. I’d be pissed too.

    • Nancy A Server says:

      Amen sister we work ours asses off….we don’t Just bring you food…you have no idea

      • Upnorth says:

        You work your asses off because that’s the job you’re being paid to do. If you want to be paid more, ask your boss to pay you more. Don’t expect the customers to gladly pay twice for the service (once in the menu price, once more in the tip). Imagine the millions of people working for minimum wage, also working their asses off, who would NEVER expect any tip. Are you somehow “better” than they are? Minimum wage is minimum wage. If you don’t want to work for minimum wage, get a different job.

    • Randy says:

      Yup. That IS why I’m pissed. Because you treat poor people who can’t afford to tip like shit. You think poor people shouldn’t be allowed to have dinner in a restaurant. We should stick to McDonalds or eat at home. You claim you NEED every person’s tip to survive because, poor you, you make less than minimum wage, even though you brag about how much more than minimum wage you make in tips. Yet if any person can’t afford to include a tip because just going out to a restaurant alone puts a, relatively, huge dent in their wallet, but they want to do something nice, you treat that person like a piece of shit and make THEM feel guilty for not being able to afford to tip.

      • Jenna says:

        Randy, not sure if you ment to reply to someone else’s comment because no where in my statement did I say I treat poor people like shit, nor did I say I treat anyone like shit. As a matter of fact, I treat all people how I’d like to be treated in and outside of work. Even the assholes, I’m sweet as can be to! I am also going to school and after I have a degree and a career I will still most likely wait tables so I can pay off my student loans faster and I enjoy the fast money. Annnddd it’s usually the richest assholes with money pouring out of their ears that don’t tip. Plus how would I know someone is poor from waiting on them? I’m not getting a print out of their bank account and I don’t judge books by their covers.

  6. mike lambo says:

    You really have to understand that the system is in place and until it is changed then yes you should obligated to “go with the flow” if you eat in a sit down restaurant. I appreciate every tip I have received, basically because I appreciate having a roof over my head and food in my belly. Here is one thing to consider (i have not read all 19 pages of comments so this may have been covered but….) when you eat in my section I am required (not asked to, but required to) pay three percent of your bill to my bartenders, food runners, and bussers. (ok you may think this unfair, and frankly so do I, I wish my company and others like it would pay a workable wage, but simply they do not. this 3% is an industry standard applicable in almost every restaurant) If you “stiff” me on a tip then i am actually forced to PAY for YOU to eat in my section. I should not have to pay to have you sit in my section, eat food that I placed the order for, made recommedations to offer the best dinning experience, and refill you soda every 20 seconds. Thats what you do when you stiff a server. You can call me a conveyor belt that simply walks around and begs for money for a living, but you are actually taking food out of my children’s mouth by not tipping. If you know that is the way the system works and you continue to stiff your server then you truly are a douche bag!

    • Upnorth says:

      It makes not one whit of difference how you agreed to share your tips with anyone else, if at all. That is between you and the company that hired you under those ridiculous terms. Not my problem. For all we know, you’re getting $30 an hour plus tips.

      It is illogical to say that someone stiffing you is forcing you to “pay for you to eat in my section”. The ordinary customer has no possible way of knowing whether you’re being paid, let alone how or how much. It cannot possibly factor into whether you “deserve” a tip. If you want to feed your children better, then why not get a job with a better salary? Perhaps you could stop blaming others who prefer to keep their discretionary cash rather than throwing it away for tips on service that’s already included in the menu prices.

  7. Tabitha says:

    Hell, I help people out of my sections all the time without expecting a tip. Servers are hard workers. I’m also a bartender and I work my ass off for hardly any money sometimes. But i still do it because it’s my job. Even after a guest has recieved their check and paid I will still ask them if they would like anything else before departing. I think that it is an ignorant statement to say that servers don’t deserve their tips. You have no idea what goes on behind the scenes. It’s hard work and it usually goes unnoticed and unaunappreciated. We also can’t “spit in your food or drinks” if you’ve already paid for your meal, seeing as though you usually pay for your meal AFTER eating it. I can usually tell when I won’t get a tip from a table too, and it doesn’t stop me from being polite and serving to the best of my abilities.

  8. Agnostic says:

    You’re purposefully being a jackass. You know what the number one reason people complain about Americans when we go to other countries? It is that we don’t respect their customs and we don’t abide by it. That we don’t bother to honor their own customs and so arrogantly insert our own comments without giving a damn about how they do things.

    That is exactly what you’re doing here. All your reasons are just an excuse to be an elitist jackass. Customer service in America involves being friendly to people, if you aren’t interested then ignore it. Stop blaming the waiters who are usually trying to get through college or make more. The younger generation in America are having a hard time getting a job and a waiter may be all they can scrounge up to make ends meet. Legally int he US, waiters and waitresses make less than minimum wage because LEGALLY the tips are supposed to supplement the rest of their income. It is not the waiter’s choice, it is how our laws work. So yes, if you eat out, you’re expected to budget for it.

    Blame our government, not the waiter’s for expecting you to supplement their income in a structure they didn’t choose. If you bothered to research anything about the typical average of people who are waitresses or waiters or the current generation, you would understand the economic situation in the US and just why they depend on those tips.

    If you choose to eat out, supply the damn tip. The tip is just automatically factored in other countries, it isn’t here. I don’t agree with it.

  9. davids says:

    Well , I’m a waiter , and i have sympathy for the writers view .
    I should point out , that i make no where near $20 / hr . in fact over a week averaging it would be $12/hr .
    BUT , his point is valid , too often i work with entitled types , who expect that a table will leave them x% and get pissed when they don’t .
    It really should be the business of the house to pay a wage , if they pay $9 / hr .. then they’ll be out of decent employers in a week . Free market economics , you set wage low , you get low quality .. end of
    It should not be left to the generousity of the public .
    Maybe they should just auto grat sales , then a good worker can sell more , and earn more ,
    This is what happens when we deal with parties and is set at 18% .

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