Disclaimer: This is merely a trend I’ve noticed with Indian parents and their kids. Obviously there will be exceptions. Keep that in mind before leaping on me!
Recently, Anupa and I decided that it’s been a long time since we had Indian food. In particular, I had a hankering for dosas. Luckily for us, there’s a place called “Dosa Hut” just a few minutes drive from our place. I thought it was okay – spacious, good dosas, and a buffet for those so inclined. But one thing ruined all of that.
Noisy, bratty, kids.
Normally in India I wouldn’t notice this, because they’re everywhere. But after staying a while in the US, it’s particularly jarring when I visit an Indian establishment. Children are everywhere in the US, but they’re hardly ever noisy. The few times when it happens, people get pissed off. Remember – your kid is not my problem. If they’re making a racket, please get them out of the restaurant by force if you have to.
There was this horror in Dosa Hut who kept running up and down the place screaming his lungs off. The parents were nowhere to be seen. Towards the end he came and lay down flat in my seat while I’d gone to get some napkins. I had to manually push him off.
What kind of parent doesn’t bother about whether or not their kid is inconveniencing others? Raising children is not some community project. There is a reason why you are parents and I’m not. Oh, you say he’s just a kid? Well he’s your kid, not mine. Ergo, your headache.
But here’s a twist and I’m not sure what to make of it. These same parents would never let their kid run wild in an American restaurant! I’ve never seen an Indian kid wreak havoc in a Chick-fil-A or a Dunkin Donuts. I wonder why? Can it be because they know it’s a wrong thing to do and that only Indian customers will “put up with it” and that they can’t be bothered to reign in the apple of their eye?
We see this same class of behavior when people return to India and start throwing rubbish on the streets. They would never do it abroad – they know it’s wrong. But they also expect other Indians to tolerate their bad behavior and this enables them. In other words, they are little more than children themselves.
So remember that while you may be immune to your little darling making a racket, the rest of don’t have to tolerate it. If you can’t control your child running wild, leave them at home and don’t spoil it for others.
Read most of the comment here and here are some of my thoughts about parenting;
Discipline start from young and its a value that all family holds. Parenting is not rocket science, it requires consistency and patience to practice it. Some kids will stop and some kids won’t, until they get what they want. Its true it runs in the family for some reason but not 100% proven. It’s not genetically proven too so don’t blame the race for not being good at parenting. Maybe you can blame the government, we always blame the government, hahaha.
It’s a culture and environment that did part of the damage. It’s true babies and young kids unable to understand what is good or bad, but if the parents don’t see the reason to be a good parent in knowing how to discipline their kids, then they are just bad parents. Parenting is a universal thing, everyone in any part of the world has one responsibility, to bring up good and responsible children. That’s every parent wishes.
I’m not amazed when I see how a kid behaved politely and I’m not surprised when I see how a kid behaved monstrously. I just have to look at their parents for answers.
Tantrums are made, not born with and I will never agree with, “ That’s how my kids are, so let it be”. So that’s the kind of parents you see the most today! I agree kids are free to express themselves but not mischievously. When you don’t control the situation whether it’s at home or in the public, you will be getting the same spoilt child made by you; the parents.
So if you think having a 3 year old hang on to your unloaded pistol is okay, think again. Tell people it’s okay, nothing gonna happen because it’s unloaded. I’m talking about THE parent that does that, not the entire nation.So kids are meant to be taught and nurture the proper way that doesn’t go against your beliefs.
The article was indeed a trend and every parents should be aware.
It happens plenty in American restaurant also. Had the issue yesterday at a regular American restaurants. 3 adults and 2 going kids at the table behind me, screaming and jumping on their chair parents said nothing even after I gave them a stare of death
Generally in the Seattle area, if I hear a kid squealing, 80% of the times they are Indian.
“You aren’t born with respect and manners. It is something that is taught.”
In reply to Sebastien St-Laurent
I agree with you. I live in Eugene, OR and have had the same experiences at home and abroad. If either one of my 2 children acted up in a restaurant, generally from the baby to pre-schooler age, my husband or I would take them outside. I am happy to report that our family of four has been complimented several times by fellow diners who have been impressed by how well-behaved and quiet our children were. We had our kids in our 30s & 40s and have always stressed the importance of respecting other people’s space and rights. Just last night at a local restaurant that my husband & now grown kids have frequented, we were jarred by a shrill high pitch scream, and then a couple more. Amazingly the parents just sat there, doing Nothing as I stared in disbelief. They did happen to be what appeared to be east Indian. I have, however been in many restaurants where children of all different ethnicities have screamed, run amok or, everyone’s favorite, banged utensils on their high chair or tabletop. What is wrong with you selfish clueless parents? I’ve walked the walk and I just don’t get it.
And let’s not get started with their food odor coming up to your house to literally stink up your clothes, cabinet and invade the entire complex. I moved into a new condo with new cabinets. The cabinets are instantly infiltrated with food odor from them. The AC can’t even be turned on without be coughing from the odor. That’s not fair. I’m sorry but if you KNOW your food has a pungent odor you should definitely light some incense or candle or febreze or something to take into consideration people around you that are not indian.
In reply to Les
I agree… we have a family living downstairs from us… actually 2 or 3 families and they are so noisy and stick up the place… its a living night mare.. we have told our landlord about them and they sort of calmed down for a while but now its full volume noise and stink again.. We dont want to be the complaining old couple but its getting ridiculous. so much kid noise is waking us up EVERY morning. Brats are not being disciplined at all..running and jumping all day and night. ( God only knows when they sleep they are probably running too). No silence. Just constant stink of unions and thumping sounds. .
I just called non- emergency police to ask for a wellness check in my apartment building. I believe there’s a pre-two or a two year old who keeps searching/screeching as loud as possible, sounds like she’s being tortured, but could be a tantrum. I never hear anyone saying shhhhhh. I’m sure I’m not the only neighbor hearing this.
In reply to Kathleen
I have one of these in the unit below mine. The kid is somewhere between 2-4 years old (I assume) and he screams continuously, all day and all night. Not “normal” childish screams of delight or typical tantrums, but unbearable high pitched piercing screams, like a little girl on a roller coaster or something. The other day the mother put the little demon on the deck outside (right below mine) and he was just howling, screaming at the top of his lungs literally every fifteen seconds. I finally went downstairs and told his mother that she HAD to put a stop to it, now, or I’d be filing a complaint and I’d keep complaining until something was done about it. She went running inside like I was chasing her with an axe.
In reply to Kathleen
I agree… we have a family living downstairs from us… actually 2 or 3 families and they are so noisy and stick up the place… its a living night mare.. we have told our landlord about them and they sort of calmed down for a while but now its full volume noise and stink again.. We dont want to be the complaining old couple but its getting ridiculous. so much kid noise is waking us up EVERY morning. Brats are not being disciplined at all..running and jumping all day and night. ( God only knows when they sleep they are probably running too). No silence. Just constant stink of unions and thumping sounds. .Screaming and rioting from boy aged about 4-7. and his sister aged about 7-9.
In reply to Kathleen
I called the child protective services on my neighbor’s.. they are not even putting clothes on the child and he is constantly screaming and running like the building is on fire or he is being abused and kicked around.. im not sure which. I have noticed that others on here are having the same issues so maybe its just how they all are… no matter what white people do now they are called racists.. so we must put up with this insane behavior all the time now. THere needs to be some kind of separation though from people who like quiet and those who like noise and smell. ( Not to mention the garbage mess they leave ). Child protective services never even showed up so maybe they know more than we know about the culture. Its no normal to me at all. They act like they are outdoors in a field even in the early morning hours.
indians are the most lazy and entitled bunch of wanks I’ve ever come across. I work in retail and hands down the worst customers are foreign ethnics, in particular Indians. Kids are always running around and screaming at the top of their lungs. I’ve asked the Indian parents a couple of times, who are usually talking either on the phone or to another indian whos shopping with them (almost always talking in indian, never english), is their child disabled? Then they have the audacity look at me as if I’m the rude one when every other customer is clearly disturbed by not only their reckless and inconsiderate children but also the lazy and nonchalant indian parents who do jack all.
1. In Australia we speak english or the indigenous here speak their own dialect of aboriginal, NOT INDIAN! So learn to speak english you rude indian pricks
2. In Australia we discipline our children, they are seen and not heard simply because a child is not born civilized and needs to be taught (no wonder indians grow up to be smelly and inconsiderate grubs, their parents didn’t discipline them properly).
3. In Australia we show a little common decency and respect to our neighbors, we dont swamp neighborhoods with other smelly, stubborn and inconsiderate ethnics who have no desire to assimilate. Make an effort to become Australian and not just hoard our beautiful land for an india 2.0 because you lot ruined the original india (because of your passive lazyness and bobble headedness).
4. Stop acting like stereotypical jews and becoming lazy business moggils who syphon the life and quality out of society wherever you go and bringing down the standard and level of decency at the same time.
A message to all indians wanting to migrate out of india. Once you cross that boarder, assimilate or piss off back to where you came from. We got enough problems here witha corrupt government, bushfires and crack heads to be wanting to deal with inconsiderate and selfish ethnics like indians.
In reply to Paddy
Wow u little racist piece of shit there is no such language as “indian”. Also – I think I speak for the vast majority of Indians living in the UK (like myself) or any other westernised country that we can speak fluent English albeit often with an accent. It’s jobless skinheads like you who try to ruin our lives because we bring valuable skills to the economy. Before you get all patriotic ask yourself where Australia would be without Asian people; not just Indians.
In reply to noname
Wow you are the racist.
Big deal you bring “a skill” but nothing more.
We don’t need you or want you so stay wherever you come from.
In reply to noname
@noname
It’s not racist for somebody to call somebody else out on their bad behaviour.
1) Control your children
2) Control the fragrances from your cooking (Western equivalent: Don’t heat up tuna in a small office)
3) Assimilate
@Paddy
I appreciate your frustration but I think you are severely racially biased:
1) Not all Indians act the way you outlined
2) Most Jewish people are hard working
In reply to Paddy
As an Indian i agree with you Paddy, people need to muster some discipline when it comes to living in other countries. You are clearly frustrated. Get another job and you’ll be fine. And in addition with a therapy, i would suggest YOU as well to think twice when you travel aboard and preach your ‘struggles’ to the people. I won’t call it racism but pure vexation and negativity. If any other Indian reads your comment, he/she will make sure that you are definitely not welcomed in their country as well. Lol 😂
In reply to Bandyboundless
What is your point exactly? That the OP shouldn’t complain, get therapy….? OP is just pointing out very common instances of poorly behaved children out in public who are simply left to their own devices.
Kids aren’t just pieces of candy that poop out rainbows. They are uncivilised little monsters that require constant attention and discipline.
In reply to Paddy
Hi Paddy, I am sorry you have had the experience you have had. Although I myself am an Indian, I have to be brutally honest and ask my country brethren to (a) discipline their children to be considerate (b) be considerate themselves and not be on the phone whilst shopping–at least not all the time and certainly not when their golden spawn is tearing down the shops (c) cook “normal” food AND ventilate their homes. I also wanted to ask, if you have tried to talk calmly but matter-of factly with these Indians. Last but not least, about “assimilate or piss off”: when you came to Australia with chains around your balls, did you assimilate with the aborigines? Just asking, you know!!
I live on a condo with five Indians upstairs. Three woman and one child and one man. It’s a two bedroom. The child jumps and runs for twelve hours. I have begged for help. They don’t seem to care and my management don’t cate either considering they are renters. It’s s shame I’ve never considered myself a racist but I must be because I hate them with a passion. I work hard can’t afford to retire and have to live like this. They are the meanest and cruelest people I’ve ever seen. I hope Karma bites them in the ass for what they have done to me.
I just moved into a very nice apartment complex and we pay a large sum compared to anywhere else in my region. It is a cement building so we were excited that we would finally get a bit of peace and quiet. The premium price would be worth the price tag for quiet. Unfortunatly there is an indian family living below us with 2 children. I have seen the mother and children coming and going and she is always texting on her phone and not watching the children. I almost hit the little one with my car because he ran out while his mother paid no mind. He carrys sticks and throws them at people windows (these are Mercedes, range rovers, and bmws). They run, jump, wrestle, slam doors, scream, and cry all day in their apartment from 7am to 1am. Fortunately they are moving in a month, perhaps they are being kicked out due to this behavior. I am so glad this is a cement building because if it was not I would literally have become deaf by now.
I feel that if you want to become Americans you should assimilate to an certain degree. If this was acceptable behavior in India, then all means but this is a different country you are living in. Yes, kids will be kids but a little discipline never hurt anyone. If anything I believe it makes a better adult.
If my child was acting in this manner I would be thoroughly embarrassed. I just dont understand how the parents can handle hearing this from the children all day and night. I would go completely mad! How can the parents just be oblivious to this type of behavior?????
I know this problem very well. I live in an apartment and most of my neighbours are Indian. Their kids are playing on the road outside the building where I live and make horrible noise for hours EVERY DAY untilit’sdark and it’s a big group. They play football and cricket. I can’t stand anymore the sound of the football banging on the road and yelling as they don’t talk to each other just yell. I wake up every morning and know already that my day will end with a headache. It’s been reported to the property management and they sent the letters to everyone telling that it is antisocial behaviour and not allowed. On the day the letters arrived I saw one of the parents telling kids to ignore it and it’s just this stupid girl (they assumed it was me as I asked children nicely on two occasions if they could be a bit more quiet or play not so close to the windows). Another neighbour on that day opened the door and all windows and played Indian music on full volume for hours and was shouting that he can do what he wants. The women give me long hateful looks. They haven’t just ignored the fact that it is disturbing to others, they encouraged their children to ignore it and be disrespectful. The kids sometimes sit on the staircase and won’t even let you pass when they see you coming, you have to ask them 3 times to let you get through and they move just enough for you to squeeze your foot between them. Little kids so disrespectful, no manners. Since the letters came they started mocking my language every time they see me. I’m so tired of this. I love diversity and never minded having Indian neighbours but they made my life hell and I feel scared now what they can do in revenge and it makes me angry that I am being discriminated because I am the only non Asian person in my closest neighbourhood. I know kids have to play and I have a child myself (they call other children funny names) but there’s park 10 minutes away and it is such a big group that parents could take turns to take them there at least sometimes. I feel like I’m not welcomed and being forced to move out.
What is your point exactly? That the OP shouldn’t complain, get therapy….? OP is just pointing out very common instances of poorly behaved children out in public who are simply left to their own devices.
Kids aren’t just pieces of candy that poop out rainbows. They are uncivilised little monsters that require constant attention and discipline.
Not just in restaurants, this is an issue in neighborhoods as well. Indian parents seem oblivious to how much inconvenience their kids cause. The kids aren’t even toddlers. They’re at least 13 or so. An age they can learn effectively. Other people have their garages open and quietly go about their projects (with their own kids) while a gang of around 10 Indian kids pass through the street piercing through the silence like motorcycles. Not asking them to be holed up inside but when they’re out it’d be nice if they could keep it down to a low roar.