It never fails to shock me how a tip is demanded in the US. People simply refuse to listen to reason when we (yes, there are others!) tell them that leaving a tip isn’t necessary. Well, I’m hoping for too much here, but if you’re a waiter, here are 5 reasons why I will try my best not to give any money to you and why the reasons for tipping are crappy.
1. You act as if you’re my best friend
Just leave me alone ok? I don’t want to bloody chit chat with you. I want food. FOOD! Get it? It’s a restaurant. I go there to eat. I go because I want either Italian food, Chinese Food or something else which I can’t get in a McDonald’s. So I come to a restaurant to fulfill my cravings for it. I will pay for what I value – food. Not you.
Christ, you offend me – kneeling down next to my table, pretending to like me and chatting as if you’re my best friend when it’s obvious that all you’re after is the tip! I’m not a bloody money bag you know. I will pay the bill which includes the cost of the food, the environment and the salaries of the people involved – nothing more.
The only way to get money out of me that I don’t have to legally pay is by prying it out of my cold dead hands…
Bottom line: I don’t want to know your name, or interact with you for any longer than I have to in order to place my order. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the equivalent of a conveyor belt that brings me my food and a computer into which I input my order. Of course, I won’t be rude. But don’t expect me to interact with you any more than I would with some stranger.
Image Credit: cafemama
2. You don’t get paid enough
And this is my problem how exactly? It’s astonishing that customers are expected to make up for your employer’s cheapness in not paying you a decent wage. Please include the full cost in everyone’s bill thank you very much. I’ll pay it because I have to and the charge is there for me to see.
What’s really funny here is that no one seems to criticize the employers! All criticism is reserved for non tipping customers instead of the owners of the restaurant for not paying a decent wage. Wtf! Could it possibly be because you guys know you can make much more by tips and under report your income to the IRS?
3. You’ll spit in my food if I don’t tip you?
And I’ll shoot your kid if you don’t give me a million dollars. Seriously, am I even hearing this right? You’re actually using the threat of blackmail to make me pay you? Well as long as you’re openly claiming to be a criminal it’s all right I guess.
Fortunately that’s why I prefer buffets. Listen apart from it being illegal, this shows your poor integrity. But if you spit in someone’s food because they didn’t give you money you didn’t earn, then you’re a loser and deserve to be a waiter for the rest of your life.
4. Bringing me my food isn’t worthy of being paid extra
Did you cook it? Did you invent it? No. You picked it up and brought it to me. While it might not be easy, there are plenty of jobs which are much worse – shop floor workers for example. And I’ve been a shop floor manager, so I know. Face it – compared to other jobs, being a waiter is unskilled. You get paid what the market will think your services are worth. You don’t deserve more for your work over and above what your employer should pay you.
5. Money doesn’t grow on trees
I expect you to be grateful and pray for me at night if I tip you 10%. Be happy I gave you anything at all. I worked for the money in my wallet and by giving you some I didn’t have to, I’m doing you a favor. Learn to remember that when people give you something they don’t need to, it’s a favor. You don’t complain that they didn’t give you more!
By the way, the same thing above applies to all professions that demand tips including those on cruise liners.
So now that you understand why I won’t give you money you don’t deserve, stop with the “oh how could you?” attitude. I can. And I will.
Update: Here’s a rebuttal of the many silly justifications for tipping that people have given in the comments section.
Reality check–if the company pays 7.25 an hour for the waiter, a flat fee, that just means the restaurant will raise the price of your dinner to compensate for the inflated wage of the server. Except the money will not go to the waitress/waiter it will go the company–and the money that could have gone to the person actually serving, and ensure your own comfort, just went into the pocket of a big CEO. Please, please read an econ book before you peck on your keyboard
~Even a fool is thought wise when he is silent~
-Best regards in your education
Hey, worst person ever. It’s not the server’s fault that the restaurant industry pays 2 dollars an hour and that only tips make it so they can make a living wage. That’s just how it works. If you want to go out to eat at the same place twice and get treated better than you, you personally, deserve to be treated, then you will tip. It’s just part of the wage. It’s just unspoken. The honor system. Too bad some people are cheap, not honorable, and cheat the system. Just be good for the sake of being good.
I would just like to say that I am a server and feel totally entitled! Lol. If you dont want to tip servers thats cool. I just want to comment on above and beyond helping tables. Tonight I had a party of 11 who needed 2-3 drink refills each, modified every entree, wanted extra cocktail sauce(all at different times of course), lemons, ketchup, steak sauce etc. Needed to have the check split 5 ways. The check was $240 and i ended up making $17. Ok so my hourly wage is alright but it is more the thought of decency to me. Forget the money it just hurt my feelings. You can look me in the eye and ask me for one thing after another knowing you are not going to give me anything for it because you are not required to. Its sad that people have lost what it means to be kind. I wont do anything to anyone’s food or give them bad service. I was just reading things to see how people justify this in their hearts. I dont think knowing makes it better. Dont worry you will still get great service and food without having to reciprocate. This world needs an enema.
The polarity in the comments makes for an interesting read; however, many of the comments also reveal ignorance of the history regarding this topic and Federal law. Here’s a link for anyone interested to start brushing up on the law:
http://www.dol.gov/dol/topic/wages/wagestips.htm.
Sorry waiters and waitresses. You get guaranteed pay of the Federal minimum wage. That’s the $7.25 per hour one as of 24 July 2009. It’s totaled by the minimum required to be paid to you directly by the restaurant owner and the tips you receive from the customer. If you don’t make an average of $7.25 per hour over the pay period, then the owner is obligated to make up for the gap. Please note that this is NOT the same as if you didn’t make an average of $7.25 per hour any one shift. Also, please note that this is before taxes, just like everyone else. The minimum required to be directly paid to you by the owner differs by State (http://www.dol.gov/whd/state/tipped.htm). Some States don’t allow for the tip credit, and some States require higher basic minimum wage. Please stop this ‘we only get paid $2.13 per hour’ nonsense. If that is all you truly make, your restaurant owner is breaking the law and filing a complaint with the Department of Labor is really easy. Somewhat certain that you will be granted something similar to whistle-blower status, too.
‘My check from the restaurant all goes to pay taxes’…AND? Everyone pays taxes and your employer is required to withhold for them usually. FICA and Medicare don’t pay for themselves, and your employer is paying other taxes on your behalf for just giving you a job. But there’s thing that you do every year…I think it is usually around April 15th or something…where you file a return. You can try and get some of that money back if you are entitled to it. If you want to talk how horrible (or great) your compensation is, the number is more like restaurant take home pay + taxes paid directly by you + taxes paid by your employer on your behalf + tips – filed return (assuming a refund). Please note that I am assuming that each and every tipped person actually claims all of their tips on their Federal return.
Some links to the history of tipping:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gratuity#Etymology_and_history
http://www.ehow.com/about_6192417_history-tipping.html
Calling it a ‘tip’ as a gratuity custom originally being an acronym for ‘To Insure Promptitude’ or similar is a myth. Historical coincidence. Besides, it doesn’t make sense. Should be ‘ensure’ and tipping should happen before the service for the extra attention. But if people prefer to stick with the blackmail inherent with suggested acronym history, by all means. I would ask that in your next service job interview, you tell the owner that you want your tips upfront and you promise to be slow if the tip doesn’t meet to your satisfaction.
Interesting too how tipping is historically controversial and how many cultures consider it a bribe. I wonder if the view as a bribe is also a historical development after tavern folk started putting the acronym on jars?
Getting rid of tips bad?
http://www.slate.com/articles/life/culturebox/2013/08/tipless_restaurants_the_linkery_s_owner_explains_why_abolishing_tipping.html
The price of a meal will not go up three-fold if the tipping culture is drastically down-scaled in favor of direct pay (through service charge or similar). Bad service folk will lose their jobs and good service folk will get a market competitive rate. Tipped service folk will make less income…income that they never reported on their tax returns anyway.
In reply to JustWow
^^Finally some logic
In reply to Lip
…But when has logic made sense on an internet forum…?
In reply to Lip
…But since when does logic belong in an internet forum…?
As a long – time restaurant person (chef for over a dozen years, server and sommelier for several more), I can see both sides of this argument. But the thing is, we servers make $2.13 less any charge for staff meals per hour. In my case, this translates to $1.88 an hour, which combined with tip’s must at least meet Federal minimum wage. I work in fine dining; this usually isn’t an issue.
If you don’t believe in tipping, fine. Stick to fast food or work on legislation to change the law. If you come to the restaurant I work at and refuse to tip, you will never be allowed back in the front door, as you will have proven yourself to be a thief: it’s theft service performed by a thieving jerk who wants to chisel his/her way out of their social responsibilities.
So if you refuse to tip, stay home. Or, as a friend of mine says “Tip me or die of thirst.”
In reply to Argyle Wolf-Knapp
wait wait wait… why should we work on legislation to change something that isn’t even against the law to do (or not do), because it is optional? if you want tips so bad why don’t YOU work on legislation to make it mandatory to take our money even though you’re already making at least minimum wage?
I don’t think you know what theft is. Theft would be not paying for the bill at all. Theft is not choosing not to pay an OPTIONAL 20% on top of the bill which has already been paid. Theft would be your employer not making up the difference in your wage if you do not reach minimum during your pay period (which IS law btw).
And it’s funny how you guys complain that you’ll just give us shitty service, therefor leaving us to occupy your tables longer; so who’s really being punished? A quick talk with the manager/owner would straighten your attitude out a bit anyway, I’m sure.
In the end you’re doing a job that is worth minimum wage, and you are required BY LAW to be compensated if your tipped wage does not equal out to minimum wage during a pay period. SOOOOO yeah, your argument is invalid.
In reply to lip
Ok then. Forget about legality and minimum wage and tip so as not to be an asshole.
In reply to Jim
That’s more what it’s about, the social obligation to tip or else you’re viewed as an “asshole” by people who mean absolutely nothing to you; people who are already being paid for their service at the restaurant.
Restaurants are not limited to people who are well off, or can afford to pay an additional OPTIONAL 20% for something that is included in the restaurant experience to begin with. So do not come back with “if you cant tip, don’t go to a restaurant”, because I’ll just say “if you can’t afford to pay your employees a legal wage, don’t OPEN a restaurant.” Stop shifting blame to people you have never met before, and maybe put some of that on the person who is demanding you perform these duties (your boss), but is not willing to pay you. Don’t pity party people with this servers wage crap, cause it’s illegal not to make up the difference if your paycheque doesn’t amount to minimum wage. Telling people not to come will just lower your hours due to less traffic.
That family with three kids, paying off a mortgage, cars, schooling, clothing for their kids want to go out to eat, but cant unless they’re willing to pay some 18 year old chick who probably lives with their parents for free an extra 20% cash for them to go party with after their shift is done? = Servers entitled logic
(And yes.. I was a server for years, and I know it is not nearly as difficult as 95% of servers make it out to seem. That’s all a guilt trip to get your money)
In reply to Jim
Or, just thinking about all the options here, the owner could pay tipped staff more as not to be an asshole. There’s no law against being paid more than the minimum.
*clap clap* How clever, Jim. You hit the nail on the head with that one… I’ll give you a tip, but only the tip ;)
@Pieces of shit like the fucker author and his fanboys in the comments: Thank you for reassuring me to stay the fuck away of any kind of “customer service” jobs, i dont give a damn about the tips but serving shitty fuckers like you that treat everyone like shit? No way, in fact i wouldnt care if i was fired, i would throw the hot food in your faces LOL, scumbags like you dont deserve any kind of respect…
@Kimberly: You are awesome, i love your attitude, i wish i met a waitress as nice and friendly as you when i eat at a restaurant, please dont change that attitude for FUCKERS like the whiner who wrote this shitty article and his boyfriend/prostitute sect of fanboys in the comments.
It’s pointless to argue with the author of this post. At the same time he seems to be something of a misanthrope. I would wager that most of your customers are more pleasant than he. In the long run you are the happier person. This isn’t a job for the thin-skinned. When I worked customer service I would develop little short stories about my worst customers. This way they provided some entertainment along with the psychic burden.
All that said. If I come to your restaurant I will leave a 20% minimum tip, unless you are heinously rude. Even then I might tip, depending on the circumstance.
The problem isn’t that people think you’re an asshole for not tipping (on good service), the problem is that you actually are one. For every non-tipping douchecanoe like yourself, there are wonderful people who sometimes tip 120%. And despite your fears, you probably won’t end up with spit in your food, but you probably will end up spending your life surrounded by people who think you’re a dick.
As a waitress, its a really awful feeling to go to the table after your guests have left, and discover there’s no tip. You are left wondering if you did something wrong and upset them, or if they just don’t understand that showing gratitude to your wonderful server means leaving a few bucks on the table afterwards. I make 4.25 per hour, plus my tips,so having a customer stiff you means the difference between paying your bills and not. I think it would be great if we didnt have this whole tipping system and businesses just paid a living wage, but unfortunately that’s not how it works. So according to me, if you dont have the money to tip, then you don’t have the money to be eating there.