5 reasons why I won’t tip you if you’re a waiter

It never fails to shock me how a tip is demanded in the US. People simply refuse to listen to reason when we (yes, there are others!) tell them that leaving a tip isn’t necessary. Well, I’m hoping for too much here, but if you’re a waiter, here are 5 reasons why I will try my best not to give any money to you and why the reasons for tipping are crappy.

1. You act as if you’re my best friend

Just leave me alone ok? I don’t want to bloody chit chat with you. I want food. FOOD! Get it? It’s a restaurant. I go there to eat. I go because I want either Italian food, Chinese Food or something else which I can’t get in a McDonald’s. So I come to a restaurant to fulfill my cravings for it. I will pay for what I value – food. Not you.

Christ, you offend me – kneeling down next to my table, pretending to like me and chatting as if you’re my best friend when it’s obvious that all you’re after is the tip! I’m not a bloody money bag you know. I will pay the bill which includes the cost of the food, the environment and the salaries of the people involved – nothing more.

The only way to get money out of me that I don’t have to legally pay is by prying it out of my cold dead hands…

Bottom line: I don’t want to know your name, or interact with you for any longer than I have to in order to place my order. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the equivalent of a conveyor belt that brings me my food and a computer into which I input my order. Of course, I won’t be rude. But don’t expect me to interact with you any more than I would with some stranger.

Image Credit: cafemama

 

Did you earn this tip?

 

2. You don’t get paid enough

And this is my problem how exactly? It’s astonishing that customers are expected to make up for your employer’s cheapness in not paying you a decent wage. Please include the full cost in everyone’s bill thank you very much. I’ll pay it because I have to and the charge is there for me to see.

What’s really funny here is that no one seems to criticize the employers! All criticism is reserved for non tipping customers instead of the owners of the restaurant for not paying a decent wage. Wtf! Could it possibly be because you guys know you can make much more by tips and under report your income to the IRS?

3. You’ll spit in my food if I don’t tip you?

And I’ll shoot your kid if you don’t give me a million dollars. Seriously, am I even hearing this right? You’re actually using the threat of blackmail to make me pay you? Well as long as you’re openly claiming to be a criminal it’s all right I guess.

Fortunately that’s why I prefer buffets. Listen apart from it being illegal, this shows your poor integrity. But if you spit in someone’s food because they didn’t give you money you didn’t earn, then you’re a loser and deserve to be a waiter for the rest of your life.

4. Bringing me my food isn’t worthy of being paid extra

Did you cook it? Did you invent it? No. You picked it up and brought it to me. While it might not be easy, there are plenty of jobs which are much worse – shop floor workers for example. And I’ve been a shop floor manager, so I know. Face it – compared to other jobs, being a waiter is unskilled. You get paid what the market will think your services are worth. You don’t deserve more for your work over and above what your employer should pay you.

5. Money doesn’t grow on trees

I expect you to be grateful and pray for me at night if I tip you 10%. Be happy I gave you anything at all. I worked for the money in my wallet and by giving you some I didn’t have to, I’m doing you a favor. Learn to remember that when people give you something they don’t need to, it’s a favor. You don’t complain that they didn’t give you more!

By the way, the same thing above applies to all professions that demand tips including those on cruise liners.

So now that you understand why I won’t give you money you don’t deserve, stop with the “oh how could you?” attitude. I can. And I will.

Update: Here’s a rebuttal of the many silly justifications for tipping that people have given in the comments section.

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12,129 thoughts on “5 reasons why I won’t tip you if you’re a waiter”

  1. If you ever sat in my section (I’m a server) I would purposely kneel down next to you the ENTIRE TIME chatting up a storm, and constantly repeating my name.

    Oh and for kicks, let me guess what you typically order. “Eggplant parm, water no ice, tabasco sauce! Is the ravioli vegetarian? No? Okay just the one eggplant parm to share with the 10 of us because us Indians are too poor to feed the family.”

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  2. you are the typical cheap dirty smelly Indian who is arrogant and probably work behind a computer all day such skilled workit is okay that you try to spread your misery to others but at the end of the day we are all still better looking better smelling and better people than you

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  3. I agree with you 100%!

    1. Waiters have the choice to pick a different profession if they’re unsatisfied with their wage.

    2. There are many people earning very low wages who are not compensated with tips. I’ve worked at McDonald’s earning $6.50/hour. I didn’t get any tips despite working very hard. I don’t understand why waiters think they are entitled to a high wage.

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  4. You are missing the obvious. If this tipping system were not in place and the employer had to pay a higher wage, the prices of the drinks and food would be higher. This is the way it is now, when it changes, you will be in the right. Now, you are just a contrarian douchebag….stay home!!!

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    • In reply to Steve

      The price increase? OK, if I get a $10 hamburger, I tip 20%, which means I add $2, totalling $12.00, right? If the tipping system were not in place, guess how much the prices of food would increase…20%. That means I am STILL paying $12.00 for the same burger, right?

      Its called math people.

      BTW, waiters DO have the choice to work elsewhere .Wanna make good money? Work for sanitation. Starting at around $12/hour, no experience.

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      • In reply to Common Sense

        You are so completely moronic and redundant. Work for sanitation and make 12 an hour? For those of us who have chosen this as a career and raise our families off this, that won’t cut it. You do realize that the hourly wage will jump ATLEAST five dollars. Your food prices will increase a lot more than 20% the quality of product will also go down drastically in most places. So, not only will you be paying more you will essentially be receiving less. You are delusional. From your tone and your constant references to Walmart employees, McDonald’s, and sanitation workers it is clear you look down on and do not respect people in the food and beverage industry (as well as those in the above jobs). I am part of the union so I already started at 7.18 an hour plus tips. I am now at 10.82 an hour. People still tip. 80% of our customers know we get hourly but still tip us. My family’s health insurance, taxes, union dues all come out of my paycheck so I’m left with very little. I live a comfortable, fulfilling life, thanks to the custom of tipping. Something tells me, dear, that you have an extremely lonely life… Obviously socially awkward. Good luck, you won’t get very far.

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      • In reply to Rebecca

        WOrked in manufacturing and worked in sanitation. Trust me, i don’t look down.

        It doesn’t matter if you chose it as a career. You chose the career and therefore understand the consequences. You said it yourself, you make 10.82/hour. THen why on Earth would I tip you? THat is a lot of money.

        At least 5 dollars? Whatever that is fine. Receiving less? Well let capitalism take care of that. Best buy workers work their hump and make less than $10/hour dear, sorry about that.

        YOu are left with little? It isn’t my problem. I’m a successful, married man who owns his house and has no debt (never had it either). Trust me, my life is fine. Some good investments and smart business management helped.

        One piece of management advice? Don’t give people money unless you are legally required to do so.

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      • In reply to Common Sense

        Don’t go out to eat then. Make your own damn food. If there were not servers at restaurants, there wouldn’t be business. You don’t HAVE to go out to eat. Remember that.

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  5. Couldn’t agree more. I am surprised servers aren’t saying anything against their employers who are artificially keeping the price low and expecting the customer to tip handsomely or else…well or else the server can spit in your food, talk rudely to you the next time you come etc etc. Why can’t the employer just price in the value of a fair tip into the food price and be done with it?

    Let me tell you what the problem with the current system is. As a server, you may think your service is worth a $10 tip while I may judge the service to be not so great and give you $5. Does that mean I deserve to be talked to rudely the next time I am at your section, or be branded a cheapo by all the waiters and routinely get served a loogie? Let’s remove the subjectivity and have standard service after pricing in tips into the food prices. And after that, if a customer really loves your service, let them by all means pay you extra. Nobody’s stopping them – just don’t expect it from all customers as a right.

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  6. EXCUSE ME…I won’t go thru all the reason I think you are a azz. but saying wait person don’t need experience..is soo wrong..Learning the menu’s, an what is in the dish, knowing the station’s doing side work, knowing how to order correctly cleaning, your side stations. how to approach a customer an give good service, DOES take experience.

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  7. It’s pretty simple. I work as a waiter while I am starting a new business. The tipping situation in the states is the way it is to increase the probability of good service for you. It is a social contract that whether you want it to be this way or not, you enter into when you go out to a restaurant where tipping is required. This social contract you fail at every time you get good service and tip poorly. My hourly wage is very low. If my hourly were higher, the business would make up the costs by making you spend more. Either way you’re paying the same amount. Instead of looking at it this way, though, you decide to put the squeeze on the one who is vulnerable; your server. I really see it as taking advantage of the vulnerable. If everyone did as you do, I literally could not pay my meager bills(my checks are ZERO every week). I take care of people who come to my restaurant because I want those people to have as enjoyable a time as I would like to have when I go out. That doesn’t mean kissing your ass or making sure you know my name; it means I do what you need when you need it so you can relax. When I go through of all that with good will and am tipped poorly by an unthinking individual like you, I feel honestly betrayed. You too have a choice, be a part of this society or eat at home.

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      • In reply to Common Sense

        Look up the definition of social contract, you idiot. Debating with you is like debating with a 5th grade student. There ARE arguments you can make against a system in which service industry workers wages are compensated through tipping, yet you have touched on none of them.

        Just as a side note, for all of those who believe service industry workers are just making way too much money, why don’t you all go get serving jobs if they are paying so much? And those who state that they make too much money have all never worked in that industry and thus have no fundamental understanding of the job and what the requirements are. The major problem with the tip system is it allows ignorant people like you to determine what I will make rather than just forcing you to pay more (more than you would even when tipping) by paying higher wages and raising prices.

        I have yet to see you propose a legitimate argument against the fact that if the restaurants just pay a higher wage and raise prices like you suggest they should do anyway because it’s not your responsibility to have to use basic judgement and do 1st grade math to determine tips, then you would be paying more than you do now since you don’t tip. So your solution to the tip system is one in which you will pay more and yet you argue that you shouldn’t have to pay servers more because all they do is carry food from point A to B. (which is a whole other argument).

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      • In reply to David K

        So what? I’m an idiot, i’m ignorant. Doesn’t mean i have to tip you. I’m asking about the legal ramifications. Lots of idiots out there that have the absolute right not to tip (unless auto grat is on the receipt).

        How about we open a restaurant that doesn’t have these fake “social contracts?”

        I go to lots of Asian restaurants and they don’t expect tips. WHy is it that more, and I hate to use this term, but “white washed” restaurants require tips?

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  8. So clearly youve never worked in a restaurant for yourself. You shouldnt be paid the wage you do because obviously your to lazy yo just stay at home and cook your own meals. Oh and by the way when you tip 10%, 2% goes to kitchen 2% goes to bar 1% goes to the hostess. So quite in fact you only gave 5. And half the people have jobs in the morning that make over 25$ an hour but due to alot of financial struggles its hard for people to keep up. The next time you leave 10% just remember. You might be leaving that tip to a college student who desperately needs that cash. But because you undersold them they wont be able to afford dinner for the night. Happens alot.

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    • In reply to steven singh

      Maybe we should leave everyone we meet in life a 10%, 15%, or 25% tip. Maybe we should tip the doctor or nurse the next time we see him. Sure a lot of people make $100k a year, but due to a lot of financial strugges its hard for people to keep up. The next time maybe you’ll remember leaving your nurse a 10% tip.

      People have jobs. Not all people get equal pay. Its called capitalism. There are rich people and poor people. Sorry that is just how it works.

      Are you struggling? Not my problem. Take it up with your boss. I’m a consumer and I really dont’ care.

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  9. If I ask 100 people in a room do you want to pay more money for a product or less money for the product I think almost everyone would say less.

    The tip is voluntary, why would anyone choose to pay more? The servers dilemma is that they are in the position of trying to use any tactic they can to convince people to pay more for a service that they can legally they have already paid for..

    They use etiquette websites, pleas for humanity for under paid employees, intimidation, social pressure (being called cheap) and name calling to convince the public to give a optional gift to the server..

    Tipping is unfortunately somewhat of a scam it has been from its inception. It has a spotty history of fraud and playing on the public conscience. For years they would underpay hotel employees and the house or the manager would steal the tips given in chairity for the workers. Laws have changed to eliminate that in most states.

    Historical intimidation by servers:

    Quote:
    So when his lordship’s guests were getting ready to leave after a week in the country, they’d find themselves surrounded by a cadre of servants with their hands out. And if you didn’t pay, it wasn’t uncommon for your horse to suddenly develop a sprain, your tapestries to go missing, or a footman to mutter he’d drop “gravy on your breeches.” Seems like punishing bad tippers started at the tradition’s inception. Scullery maids probably spat in their lordship’s tankards of mead.

    Playing on Christian Charity.

    The Pullman Train company in the early part of the century saved millions of dollars in wages a year by convincing (suckering) a sympathetic public to tip (pay) the wages of its employees. Brilliant strategy sucker the public into knowing they were underpaid, playing on the sympathizes of the public, and then turning around and charging the black porters for riding on the trains, buying their own food and sleeping on the train.

    Quote:

    And if that wasn’t bad enough, the company cynically made sure its passengers knew the porters were underpaid and depended on tips to survive. This led the St. Louis Republic to editorialize, “Other corporations before now have underpaid their employees … but it remained for the Pullman Company to discover how to work the sympathies of the public in such a manner as to induce the public to make up, by gratuities, for its failure to pay its employees a living wage.” The editorial concluded, “It was the Pullman Company which fastened the tipping habit on the American People and they used the Negro as the instrument to do it.”

    On average according to the IRs Servers only report 16% of the income they make, they don’t report 84% of their income!

    That’s robbing everyone who does pay their taxes legitimately. Less police, Fireman and social services. Plus many employer’s encourage this as they must pay a 8% tax on all of the servers income, the lower the salary of the employee the less the employer pays.

    How do they get away with this, they are paid by tips in cash instead of having a legitimate record of the transaction. This practice of not reporting is illegal and costs the american public billions of dollars every year.

    In order to commit tax fraud the key is to be able to make the public willingly pay more in cash then they need to for a product. Its the paying in unreported cash that is the problem. If everyone stopped tipping this scam would go away and a system would emerge which forces honest bookkeeping.

    its illegal to withold reporting your full income. Not tipping is perfectly legal!

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  10. This post is almost 4 years old but I can’t resist commenting. I’m so disgusted by this entire post. Waitresses make $2.89 an hour. No, not just a little less than minimum, just under $5 less than minimum. Yes we expect you to tip. Waitessing can be hard. We deal with asswipes like you who don’t understand that every payday we don’t get a paycheck because all the taxes on our tips get taken out. So what we make in tips is what we live on. If you go somewhere that is a chain, chances are the servers are basically forced to introduce themselves, walk you through the menu and push the company’s online survey, usually under threat of termination. So the fact that you’re complaining when people are just trying to give you what the company deems “good service” is despicable. You’re probably someone who sees their waiter and instead of letting them greet you, interrupts with your drink order. Finally, I just want to put it out there that if you can’t afford/don’t want to tip DON’T GO OUT TO A RESTAURANT WHERE IT’S EXPECTED. Use your common sense and lose the condescending attitude you pretentious douche. You wouldn’t last 5 minutes serving, so keep your uneducated shit to yourself.

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    • In reply to Mary

      There is a great post on the Freakonomics podcast about how ridiculous tipping is. There is a professor at Cornell University who actually studies tipping behavior in the United States.

      What is his argument? Ban tipping.

      It is discriminatory, a form of bribery/corruption (countries that tend to tip high also see higher levels of corruption) and is arbitrary.

      Many labor lawyers even call tipping practices discriminatory. why?

      Certain waitresses tend to rack up more tips than others. A white, slender, 30 something year old waitress with big breasts tends to rack up more tips than her male counterparts or her non-white counterparts.

      A black waitress was not hired by a restaurant because she does not have “the look.” Even though this is not direct discrimination, the Supreme Court says ANY form of discriminatory practices are illegal.

      Plus–you making $2.89 is not my problem. Perhaps you should find another job that pays more. There are plenty. Waitressing isn’t the only job in the world, ya know. I never waited at a table in my life and went through school just fine.

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      • In reply to Common Sense

        Look, in the United States, it’s customary to tip. It’s engrained in our culture and your little posts will never abolish it. You can complain all you want and whine about how we’re stealing your hard earned money and blah blah blah but in the end when you don’t tip, you’re going to get bad service and a bad reputation at whatever restaurants are unlucky enough to have you as a patron. And as for getting a higher paying job, I’ve had jobs that pay me $10+ an hour and I didn’t make nearly as much as I do working for $2.89 an hour plus tips. Did I ever say it was your fault or problem that’s how much I make an hour? No. Because its not. But when you’re shitting on my job and sitting on your high horse about how it’s so wrong for us to expect tips, I’m going to bring my wage into it. Would you rather give a gratuity or pay much higher prices on your food, plus tax? I don’t even need a follow up comment to know you’re going to say higher prices. Simply put, you’re cheap. You want low prices and no tips. Sorry to say those two do not go hand in hand. So “Common Sense” looks like you need to get some and realize the culture you live in.

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      • In reply to Mary

        Guess what…in Africa, it is the culture to perform female circumcisions. Does that make it ok? Its the culture they live in, right?

        The culture argument is a complete cop out. It was also the culture in the US to have slaves. I’m sure plenty of Southerners said “hey, its Southern culture to own a slave. It is engrained in our culture and your little Civil Wars will never abolish slavery. You can complain all you want and whine about how we’re making blacks suffer and stealing hard working blacks from Africa blah blah blah, but in the end, if we don’t have slaves, we’re going to be producing bad cotton and crops.”

        You admitted yourself tips allow you to make more than $10 an hour, so this is MORE reason for me not to tip. What if I get bad service? So what? I really don’t care as long as I get my food. If my food is bad, guess what? I’ll complain to your management, HR, your corporate officers, etc.

        It isn’t illegal for me to not tip, however it technically is illegal for you, as an employee, to give ridiculously bad levels of service.

        I wouldn’t mind paying higher prices on food plus tax. It makes it less ambiguous.

        MATH TIME!!!!

        Ok, average tip is 15%, right? Lets say I get a burger for $10 and I have to pay tip, which is $1.50. If tipping were abolished, wouldn’t that 15% simply transfer over to the burger price, raising it only $1.50?

        Also, I worked in food and beverage at the manufacturing end. Food prices at restaurants are marked up on average of about 300%. So that burger is really only worth $3.33. Plenty of profit there.

        BTW, here in California, you guys are already paid the same wages as non-tipped employees. So why should I tip in California?

        COmmon Sense, right?

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      • In reply to Common Sense

        You clearly have too much time on your hands to sit there and type your nonsensical arguments. We choose serving/bartending because it is lucrative. Why? Because unlike you, the vast majority of the US population tips. This allows us (or atleast me) to make WELL over 10 an hour (i worked 6 hours and made $685 this past friday night) You say “get another job” “why should I tip if you already make that much”. Well sir, continue to not tip that’s fine but you cannot change what most of the population thinks is customary and who view you as, well, for lack of a better word “scumbag” maybe you’re envious? Of those of us who chose this as a career… I love my life, I make a killing, and I love my job
        And the crazy hysterical people I work with, I have the funds and flexibility to travel the world. You clearly do not dine out at fine establishments, and you clearly do not go out to enjoy yourself. I feel genuinely bad for you…

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    • In reply to Mary

      Seeing the end of your comment doesn’t seen you have a education as you said. I was a waiters and I have seen what some waiters have done with the tips they have gotten. At the end we all get minimum wage Which is around 9 bucks Because the restaurant is obligated to match it up and if that’s no your case, they are exploiting you.

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