The upcoming “The Dark Knight Rises” has many movie lovers in hysterics. They can’t seem to stop oohing and aahing over the trailer and singing the praises of the most recent Batman franchise. Amidst all this ruckus, I have to bring some sanity back here.
I’m a rabid Batman fan. Have been for most of my life. I’ve done my duty and run through an obscene number of DC comics and have read all the famous (and not so famous) story arcs in the Bat universe. So you can say that I “get” Batman. I know what he’s all about. Sure, it’s unrealistic in so many ways but it’s an awesome fantasy. A normal human being able to achieve the things he does. It just gives you a high.
But Batman movies? Not so much. I always found that they pretty much suck big time. I respect the character of Batman too much to see him mutilated. Which is why I hate the recent Batman series by Christopher Nolan. What surprises me is that everyone raves about them as if they’re the awesomest movies ever made. Sure, they’re probably better in comparison to the Joel Schumacher version, but that doesn’t make them good. In fact, I find them awful. And here’s why:
Batman’s Appearance – The “Helmet”
I hate Batman’s appearance in Christopher Nolan’s universe. There are so many things wrong with him that I don’t know where to start. He’s not menacing enough. He just looks like a funny guy in a suit. The suit itself is a horrible wreck, looking like a clumsy piece of armor rather than something flexible that can be moved easily in. And before the fans start shouting “It has to be realistic!”, let me assure you that Batman as a concept isn’t very realistic at all. But more on the “realism” aspect later.
He’s not scary. At all. Just look at his “mask”:
That’s a helmet! He doesn’t look in the least bit scary. His mouth and lips are “squeezed” into a gap, making it bunched up. No wonder Bale talks with his lips parted so often! Next up – the eyes. Why, oh WHY can’t Batman movies make the eyes white like they are the comics? Dammit, this guy actually has makeup on his face around his eyes. MAKEUP! It makes me want to cry when I see what Nolan has done to my favorite comic book hero.
For reference, here is how Batman’s cowl should look like:
See the difference? Now that is scary. THAT is a sight I wouldn’t want to see at night swooping down at me. The guy in the first picture? Some loony clown on drugs wearing a costume. Pchaah!
Crappy Armor – Horrible Cape
I don’t even know where to start. I mean look at that suit. It’s a bunch of disjointed pieces fitted together haphazardly. It’s not uniform or elegant. It just looks shoddy. There we go again with that whole “realistic” mantra that Nolan loves to try and inject into this character. Please Nolan huh? Go make movies of Superman or something and leave this guy alone – please.
Batman’s cape has always been part of his effect. And yet it does nothing for him in the movie. It doesn’t even merge in color with the main suit! It’s a deeper shade of black that ruins the “solid” effect of night that is Batman. It breaks the illusion that this is one gigantic bat – almost supernatural. Instead, it tells us that this is just a costume worn by a guy for unknown reasons – since it’s clearly not scary. Here’s a nice shot of the real Batman style:
Let up with the voice huh?
We all know that Bruce Wayne disguises his voice as Batman to make it scary as well as to keep his identity secret. Works great in the Batman animated series, so why can’t Nolan give us a real crackling voice huh? In various media, Batman’s voice has been compared to “stepping on broken bottles”. In some comics, Batman literally uses his voice as a weapon to scare criminals into submission whenever he can.
And once again, Nolan turns Batman’s voice into a joke. You can barely understand squat of what he’s saying. It’s obvious that his voice is fake and put on. And coming from that squished out mouth of his, it just makes you want to puke. Someone needs to tell Nolan’s Batman to shut the fuck up.
The Batmobile
Ok – I get it. You were trying to compensate for the “blue lighted” batmobile in the Joel Schumacher movies. But come on! That’s not a batmobile – that’s a tank! Where’s the “bat” in it? It’s not stylish, it’s not elegant. It doesn’t make a statement. And remember that Batman is all about style. That’s why we really like him so much. More about that in the “realism” section.
Gotham
Gotham city is an integral part of Batman. It provides the setting, the atmosphere and sets the mood of the comics. It’s even called Gotham city for a reason. Because it’s gothic. Nolan’s Gotham is a ghastly departure from what Gotham should be. Where are the soaring cathedrals? Where are the gargoyles? Where is all the goth? He’s just gone and turned Batman’s city into Chicago! What the hell was he thinking?
Here’s is Nolan’s Gotham – aka Chicago:
And this is the “real” Gotham:
Poor Fighting Style and Posture
Everyone knows that Batman is one of the greatest martial artists of the DC universe. He’s the master of hundreds of fighting styles. He’s agile, knows his reach with mathematical precision and conserves the minimum amount of energy and movement while fighting.
And yet, Nolan’s Batman fights like a thug. There’s the scene in a pub which I cringed while watching. He’s like a boxer, even taking up a stance to fit. He looks ridiculous:
Notice by the way, how his cape is of a darker color than the suit. It doesn’t mesh. It breaks the continuity and looks just like just another piece of cloth. Not a part of him. It just looks funny. Here’s how it should look:
Notice how the cape drapes, how it “merges” into the cowl. Also see how Batman covers up his eyes. It makes him look scary instead of just a guy in a suit. Remember how cool Ironman’s mask looks when his eyes light up? Why the hell can’t we have the same thing for the bat?
Fake “Realism” in Nolan’s Movies
I’ve saved the worst for last. Nolan and many of his fans excuse all the above mistakes by saying that this is a “realistic” take on Batman and Gotham. I call bullshit on that claim. Because even as depicted, Batman is horribly unrealistic. You want realistic, get rid of the cape. It hinders you, can get caught on stuff, and you can trip over it. The marginal utility of being able to slow your descent and hide some stuff in it is heavily outweighed by the disadvantages. Even Nightwing has remarked that a cape cramps one’s style too much.
But yet we keep it. We have to keep it. Why? Because it’s about image. Because it makes Batman what he is. It’s about style. It’s about maintaining the atmosphere. Even Nolan can’t get rid of the cape without destroying Batman. Moral of the story – this is a comic book. Style and atmosphere trump realism. And I’m just scraping the surface here. Superman is in Batman’s universe as well! Talk about aliens and unrealistic in the same breath?
Spare me the junk realism please. Give me something that for once stays true to the comics. Two great movies I’ve seen that replicate the mood and the style of their respective comics perfectly are “Watchmen” and “Sin City”.
Can we please have a Batman version of “Sin City” for those of us who appreciate what Batman is really about? We’ll gladly leave the Christopher Nolan’s fans at the altar alone.
Haha is this guy serious?
This whole piece was nothing but bias bs. C.N.s Batman is nothing more than his vision of Batman like all the different versions of the graphic novels, movies, and tv series. Stop crying. If you were such a creative phenom, you would have your own movie, graphic novel, or tv series deal. You’re just another one of those losers that needs to pick apart someone else’s success.
In reply to joe
That is perhaps one of the most ignorant responses to criticism you can give. First off you don’t know if the person writing this is a filmmaker or not. Second criticism is not “picking apart someone’s success.” As an adaptation one can easily criticism Nolan’s Batman films. [You can have good and bad adaptations you know] Third, just because something is successful doesn’t mean that it’s either good, or that it’s perfect. The mainstream likes lots of stupid stuff that has no artistic merit whatsoever. I like some of that stuff myself, but I’m not going to say it’s the greatest thing since sliced bread.
And last, if you look at many of the artist’s, writer’s, and filmmaker’s that we admire. The majority of them started off as fans who decided that they could do better, and many went on to do actually that. That doesn’t equate to “loser” in my book. There’s a lot of merit in this “opinion piece” maybe this guy, or some other guy will take it and run with it while fanboys like you will fork out hard earned bucks to go see it.
These Movies were all eye sores. Rip Batman, ( movie Batman at least)
Okay, here is my opinion.
You have to realize that the person who plays batman is a rich boy, it’s quite hard to picture any rich boy menacing. The suit was first built as armor to resist all the dangers of the fights he would be in, and if you really paid attention to the Dark Knight, you will realize he turned the suit more flexible after the fight with the dogs, the mob and that mental dude. I’ll also reply on the ‘realism’ in my comment later on. The helmet thing, the cops can catch someone easily enough by mouth shape, and him to have it squeezed together makes his face different texture than what surveillance can catch. Okay, the white eyes could have been added as lenses or something, also blends with the night vision goggles at the end of the Dark Knight. Makeup… Makeup is a big important for characters, it can change people in so many ways, make them look like hobos or hardened war heroes.
You have to realize they made this movie ‘realistic’, and for a man to wear some pieces of clothing and avoiding as many bullets as he endures is fake, like most movies turn out to be. Once again, I’ll get to the realism when I see it. The cape; it does lots for him in the movies. It’s for gliding maneuvers, if he were to fall or if he wanted to get to places he couldn’t, like the jump in China he did to capture Lau. And, aren’t all ‘superhero outfits’ just costumes?
If he could do a different voice that was more ‘scary’, than he probably would. You have to do with what you have, his voice was actually pretty decent on hiding his own voice. He probably did have more menacing voices in him, but they sounded too much like him.
Okay, for them to actually add every single aspect of the real ‘Gotham’ into all the slides they take and create, it would take way too much time off their hands it would be better to just make an anime. Yes I would also have liked to see it more goth like the ending of the first one, THAT seemed goth enough for me. Then again, I’m pretty sure ‘Gotham’ in the comics was mostly based on the suburbs, which of course look crappy.
Bruce Wayne is NOT an engineer; he cannot just magically create a brand new vehicle that can sustain all that it can take. It’s meant to be a tank. It looks very well stylish to me, I’m betting 90% of people who have seen the movie would want that tank.
This movie has been one of the most realistic movies I have seen, excluding the few times I have seen the bad guys shoot way too slow up close and personal. Other than that, I have seen no un-realisim in these movies, and I respect any movie that is realistic than fake. Too many movies out there are fake, boring and action packed, but not REAL action. For instance; a lone dude running with no cover being shot at by an army and doesn’t even take a bullet. Even with AK-47s and there shitty accuracy, if you had enough people that person would be hit definitely. I have not seen many movies bring realism into action, one of the few I can say is Valkyrie. The gunfight in the hallway at the end, pistols blazing and everyone running for cover. THAT was a realism battle. Yes most people probably like the unrealistic action gunfights, but you have to respect the people who can actually bring realism into action movies, since not many people experience what it is like to be in a real gunfight. Talking about the cape again; the cape is made out of a type of cloth that is thick enough not to be caught but it’s for gliding purposes. If you want a realism movie, go back to the old ones they made. I’m sure those were real enough.
Anyone can make a fake fantasy style universe, but it takes REAL thought, and real effort into making realistic ideas. I don’t see how people can respect a movie, comic, or something else for something unrealistic and unexplained. It’s like people craving over a movie about a dude who can shoot lasers from his eyes simply because he can. No explanation, or like I said, running through a hundred bullets and not even being scratched, yet taking down the whole army like he’s God.
To sum up my point, you’re criticizing a movie on your beliefs of stuff you don’t like, but that does not make these movies suck. It makes them brilliant movies that you do not like. If you haven’t looked it up, the Dark Knight got a 9.0 rating on IMBD, the highest rating movie being a 9.3; Shawshank Redemption. They put a lot of effort and realism into these movies it’s not even funny. You should really rename your article “7 Reasons I didn’t like Christopher Nolan’s Batman.” Please be realistic with yourself, and blaming movies over stuff you don’t like. We all have our opinions and I respect that, but to make a false claim like you’re doing is selfish.
Totally agreed, this is why, like someone else stated, tim burtons batman films will always be my favorite. I also liked Batman Forever, but hated Batman & Robin. nolans films have some things i liked, but overall at the end of the day if i want to watch a batman film, i will pick any of the original 3. the “new” movies are just a load of hype and trying to be oscar contenders. i dont think comic book movies should be trying to win oscars, i think they should be about being entertaining. to the OP of this article, i think you would love tim burtons batman movies if you want a real “comic book” portrayel. i think he came closest to the mark with his 2 films. i still think Forever by schumacher was great fun and really cool batman movie, but burtons had the darkness and depth that schumacher missed for the most part.
the original batsuits and batmobile were much better.
I thought I was the only one who didn’t like the Nolan Batman movies! Overall I felt like something was missing from them, it just didn’t feel like the Batman mythology. I didn’t mind the suit that much, and I loved the scene in the first Nolan installment when he discovers the bat cave, closes his eyes, and lets the bats surround him, essentially “becoming” Batman. Very cool scene. But I can’t stand the batmobile, that thing is awful. Hate the fighting scenes too, not enough cool moves or framing. And come on man where are the gadgets, we only get a little of that. And is it just me or did the script/story feel unfulfilling?
I think Nolan is a great director but this series missed the mark for me. On positive notes I will say the music was good and set the mood well. Performances were fairly solid, with the exception of Heath’s Joker which was more than solid it was AMAZING. That will go down in history as one of the most incredible, prolific portrayals of a classic villain.
For me it can be summed up like this: Joel Shumacher’s was way to gay and cartoony, Nolan’s was focused too much on realism. Finding the balance between comic and movie proves to be the elusive holy grail with Batman movies.
I think the Nolan versions benefited from the aftereffects of George Clooney being out-acted by Arnold Schwarzenegger. Batman and Robin was so horrible that everyone from casual to hardcore fans were happy with the idea of a reboot, especially one that was more serious/realistic.
But yes, Nolan’s vision had some serious issues with established canon. For me the worst part was Batman’s character and motivation. Especially in the final movie where he talks with Robin about living with bottled up anger and turning it into motivation. Batman was not about anger. Contrast, please, with The Incredible Hulk. Sure, he could get angry, but he didn’t fight crime because he was angry someone killed his parents. And it wasn’t vengeance either. Batman’s motivation was justice. He is a knight, a protector, a defender. He is that way because he didn’t want a repeat of the injustice of what happened to him with his parents. They took “The Dark Knight” and changed him to “The Vengeful Ninja”.
In reply to Ross
That’s a good point. The previous versions were so bad that everyone welcomed an attempt at making a serious film.
Perhaps I’m on my own island, but I thoroughly enjoyed the hyper realism. If your focused on gadgets, capes or fighting styles then you’re not really critiquing the film your arguing about its loyalty to the original canon, not it’s substance or lack thereof. I would say that Nolan utilized the source material and showed deference to it, but was not interested in making a fan boy film. Sorry bhagwad, but Iron Man and Thor where banal exercises in weak narrative and product placement (Burger King Mr. Stark?).
I think a crucial fact separates the Comic fans from the realism fans. In the Dark Knight Rises much more of Wayne is seen than Batman and this was one of the major complaints by some viewers. For me, seeing Wayne as a vulnerable man, bereft of purpose, his philosophy having seemingly been defeated by the Joker, dying with the dream that was Harvey Dent; provided an interesting character examination of Wayne’s mythical trajectory. My two cents would be that Nolan’s film was more geared toward the mythology of the hero (look to Joseph Campbell’s seminal “The Hero With a Thousand Faces” or consider aspects of Beowulf), a fatalistic being who loses faith and must be fall and rise again to strip himself of all fear, all worries, affirming his purpose. He inhabits the pit, the prison of Bane and from this he rises, stripped of the self-denying aspects of his soul, or whatever concept you would like to place here (in a mythological sense). Thus, the trilogy is a finite period, with a determinant end. It’s the full cycle of the traditional hero whereas the traditional comic Batman is a seemingly unending figure fighting case after case.
I think the fundamental distinction is that some of us enjoy the socio-political mirror reflections of our present society that are permeating the entire trilogy. I understand some people want the comic book version, but your arguments merely support that desire, they don’t really offer any compelling argument as to why Nolan’s films in themselves are not great blockbuster’s with some general substantive ideas (for the laymen and intellectual) to experience and perhaps even ponder.
In reply to Nate
(Burger King Mr. Stark?).
It’s rather amusing how people can in one breath talk about hyper-realism, and then knock product placement in that same breath. You can’t get more real than having someone eat food from an establishment that is probably less than a mile for your house. Burger King exists, what reality does Gotham reside in where people don’t watch or talk about television shows, eat fast food, or . . . okay they do go to sporting events.
Just joking, though my point is valid. I still say that Nolan’s Batman realism is the same as James Bond (Mr. Craig please) realism, and Bond is still more realistic. Nolan gives you the illusion of realism, but make no mistake such a situation in the “real world” would not play out that way actual Batman or not. Our government would not have a stand off with terrorists in an American city under siege last for three months. A broken back takes slightly longer than a half a year to heal and even then I doubt you’d be 100%. Speaking of Bond, doesn’t Bane and Talia seem really reminiscent of the relationship between Electra King and Renard? Even to the point that both movies wasted a really good bad guy by having all his motivation come from being devoted to a woman that will never recognize it? Say what you will about the comic version of Bane, his motivation and execution of “his” own plans were made much more sense and were much more intriguing in the comic.
I will give you that what Nolan did does serve “his” purposes well, and he did a good job, but a lot of people are making these films to have a lot greater significance than they warrant, and what significance they is not being upheld by this hue and cry of “realism”.
[Also if I don’t hear a reference to Campbell’s the hero’s journey, or The Hero With A Thousand Face it would be to soon. Every freakin’ story with get from Hollywood and every epic game uses to template so blatantly it’s become stale ] There are other story paradigms out there and the quicker somebody starts utilizing them, the better the entertainment industry will become.]
In reply to James Smith
Damn, this site needs an edit button, or a preview button.
Last sentence 2nd para.
. . .his motivation and execution of “his” own plans made much more sense, and were much more intriguing in the comic.
3rd para.
. . .a lot of people are making these films appear to have a lot greater significance than they warrant,
Aside:
Every freakin’ story {we} get from Hollywood, and every epic game uses to template so blatantly it’s become stale ]
I hate it when I re-read my own post and can’t make sense of what I just said. : )
In reply to James Smith
I’ve tried to put in additional comment features, but they usually just end up making the page slower…especially when a post like this gets a lot of comments.
But it’s still something to think about…
Also, you may enjoy this examination by the philosopher Slavoj Zizek on the third installment which highlights some of the many benefits and ideas implicit in the realism of Nolan’s recent film.
http://boitempoeditorial.wordpress.com/2012/08/08/dictatorship-of-the-proletariat-in-gotham-city-slavoj-zizek-on-the-dark-knight-rises/
Let me put it another way, because it sounds like I dislike Nolan’s Batman and that’s not the case. I think that arguments about it’s “realism” are not the way to debate the merits of the films.
The primary point being that the argument is based on a fallacy. You can tell, or make a relevant or significant movie, or book in any genre. There have been stories with ideas, or commentary of society done in all genres; horror, Sf, adventure, and Westerns; many of those films aren’t particularly realistic (Romero’s dead pictures for instance), but they say quite a bit about the society. So trying to say that Nolan’s Batman films are superior because of their “realism” is not correct. If you want to make a realistic film about vigilantism, or anarchy then don’t make a Batman film; however you can easily make those the themes the forefront in a story that happens in a world with costumed crime fighters by good writing, good direction, and staying true to your story throughline. I’d say Nolan did a rather superb job in TDK with that very thing. What I really think is tripping people up is the notion that making somebody believe something they happen to be watching in a theater is synonymous with that film being realistic when all it really means is that the filmmakers didn’t violate that viewers particular suspension of disbelief threshold.